Tag Archives: doctor

Decisions.

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Adulting is hard not because we are not up to the responsibilities that accompany it. Rather, the decisions that we have to make can weigh us down, especially if these decisions can alter how we live our lives and all other decisions that we will be making in the future.

Circumstances brought me here to Manila to do a lot of contemplating on what to do next. And one of them is about breast cancer. Yes, I plan to have an executive checkup here in Manila after my husband leaves for abroad. I already inquired in one of the hospitals in our province, unfortunately, they don’t offer executive checkups yet.

If my breast ultrasound (included in the executive checkup) comes out clear, I still plan on consulting with Mom’s oncologist when I get back to Bicol to ask if I should still have a mammogram since I’m only 38 years old. The recommended age for having a mammogram is 40 years old and above.

But given our family’s history of breast cancer, I would like to know what my options are. To be honest though, I feel awkward consulting with male doctors. 😁 I don’t know why in my previous consultations and even when I was hospitalized because of dengue, all the doctors who attended to me were all females though I never requested it.

Please don’t get me wrong because I am no sexist. It’s just that I feel like I can’t bare my heart out to a male doctor. lol Now, that gives you an idea already that I don’t have guy friends. To all the male doctors out there, I send you greetings of peace. ✌️😁 With female doctors, I tend to be very talkative especially when I’m nervous.

But it looks like my Mom’s oncologist will be an exception because of 2 things. First, I trust him because I already witnessed how he and the other doctors helped Mom manage her illness even though she’s in a very critical condition already. And second, I read this article on why credentials matter when choosing a doctor. He’s got strong credentials, so I’m assuming he’s the best of the best. Or maybe I’m just biased. lol Nah, he is the best in town – there’s no need for second-guessing here. 👍 These two factors are very important because basically, my life will depend on him.

I have a lot of questions that I’ve been meaning to ask him once we meet. One of them is if it’s a better alternative to have a double mastectomy just like what Angelina Jolie did to minimize the possibility of having breast cancer later on. But here’s my problem. What if I still want to have kids?

A double/bilateral mastectomy would mean I will no longer be able to breastfeed. After seeing the testimonies of other patients in the breast cancer support groups, I have decided not to push through with breast reconstruction surgery (skin grafting/implant), if ever, to lessen the chances of a recurrence or getting an infection. Although I read one case wherein after a bilateral mastectomy, the patient still had a recurrence on her chest wall this time.

I guess breast cancer cases really vary depending on whether the type of breast cancer is aggressive or not. I am hoping Dad’s genes are more dominant than my Mom’s, and my siblings and I will be spared from having breast cancer later on. Then I suddenly remembered that my Dad’s aunt (the sister of his dad) passed away because of breast cancer, too.

Yes, it will be a miracle if I die later on because of old age or any other sickness. But nothing is impossible with God. And if we also do our part to live a healthy lifestyle and have our regular checkups, then I believe dying of old age is still achievable.

Right now, all my siblings (1 brother and 3 sisters) are doing okay, by God’s grace, and they are between the ages of 40-50 already. But the thing is, we all haven’t had any breast cancer screenings lately.

I’m on a mission now to convince them to accompany me when we visit the doctor so they can have their checkups, too. I don’t know if my siblings are up to it because on my end, I am not afraid of whatever the findings are. Because when I do trust the doctor, even if I’m about to die, I will be at peace. My only request is to make my dying as painless as possible. Oh, and also, I want to die pretty.

I’m sure the doctor will tell me, “Tin, maybe what you need is a makeup artist and not a doctor.” 😅 Seriously though, nothing is more difficult than making decisions wherein your life is at stake. It’s as if you are given choices that will still eventually lead to you dying. What you’re actually given are options to die sooner or later.

So, how do I take this? It really depends on what God’s will is. Because right now, I am ready to go any time. I am at peace with everything because I already achieved some of my dreams, I did what I’ve always wanted to do in life, my siblings are doing okay, Dad has lived in full circle, and my husband has a bright future ahead of him – I am already content.

But as always, not our will but let God’s will be done always. We only do what is required of us, then we let God do the rest. Right now, I am contemplating whether having a child will still be my priority or if living cancer-free will take center stage from here onwards.

I still would want a child though even if I have it through IUI (as suggested by our ob-gyn 6 years ago but hubby was not yet ready). The thing is, my pregnancy will increase the estrogen levels in my body, and estrogen is what cancer cells feed on. However, if having a kid is not meant to be, then just like what Heart Evangelista said, “maybe we’re really not meant to have it all.”

When it comes to living a life with a flat chest because of bilateral mastectomy, the matriarchs in our family survived breast cancer and still got to live meaningful lives until they became seniors. For our generation, only God knows our fate. 🙂

Decisions, decisions. Make them wise, make them count. This I claim, and this I pray. 🙏

Let’s backtrack to a ’90s song (I’m a ’90s kid) that became a dance hit because I am feeling sentimental this Saturday. 😌

“Teach us (Lord) to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.” – Psalm 90:12

KonsultaMD + Singlife & Sun Life: Are They Worth It?

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This year, God is telling me to prioritize my health above anything else. And once again, God never fails to provide when you ask.

“Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.” – Matthew 7:7

My KonsultaMD activation came just in time for the celebration of International Women’s Day yesterday. Ah yes, thank You, Lord, for this wonderful gift. 🙏

And yes, it’s really a blessing because I got 3 months’ worth of free access including 1 video and unlimited voice consultations with a general practitioner/specialist. Super awesome, right? I can’t wait to ask the doctor every question I could think of like, “Doc, as a man of Science, do you think the air there in Nibiru is toxic to humans?” Or how salty is salty? Or why is cancer called “cancer”? Can’t we call it “Scorpio” or “Capricorn”? Or how about “Taurus”? 😂

Most likely the doctor will red-tag me as the worst patient ever in human history. lol And the next time I consult with the doctor, he/she is going to tell me to stop pestering him/her with all this nonsense. But I already prepared an answer for that, too: “Oh I am terribly sorry, Doc. I thought you’re an AI Doctor.” 😆

Okay now, let’s skip the jokes lest the doctors who get to read this block me on the app forever. Going back to KonsultaMD, if you’re wondering how I got the free access, it’s included in the new Singlife health insurance I purchased through the GCash app. For the past weeks, I’ve been researching and comparing the differences between HMOs (Health Maintenance Organizations), health insurance, and VUL (Variable Universal Life) insurance. We all know that getting sick can be quite expensive, and we don’t want to spend all our life savings on hospital bills and medications.

I was doing my research on insurance the past weeks, thus, the WordPress hibernation. Another reason for my absence is that I have to limit my digital footprint as part of my preparations for yet another task. So this means I’ll be setting the visibility of this blog to “private” after a few weeks. But I’ll change it to “public” again when the time is right (because I just love my WordPress community). I was also busy “scrounging” the internet for any free medical services that I could find so I can share them with the breast cancer support groups on Facebook.

The number of breast cancer warriors who do not have the means to get their medical checkups is still increasing. My heart bleeds for these women. Sometimes I can’t help but cry because some of them are too sick and have been suffering from severe pain for a long time already because they don’t even have enough money for their basic needs.

But how do I help them? I feel like I only have 5 barley loaves and fishes and there are thousands to feed (Matthew 14:17-19). Day and night, every time I see a post asking for help where to get free medical consultations, lab tests, medicines, etc., I would pray to God to give me the resources to help them.

And God answered – I came across these free events and lectures (thanks, Doc Emmeline!) on social media. I am also praying for opportunities to accompany some of the women in the group especially those who are alone, are too weak to go to nearby hospitals, are too scared, are at a total loss for what to do and where to start, or don’t have enough money to pay for transportation expenses.

Unfortunately, this will have to wait because I’m currently busy helping my husband prepare for his exam this coming Monday. I am praying he will pass the exam so he can achieve his dream of working abroad. I am so happy to see how God is working in my husband’s life right now. It also motivates me to trust God even more. After sending him off, I hope I can devote some of my time doing volunteer work for breast cancer warriors back home.

Why Singlife?

I discovered Singlife through Globe’s GCash app back in 2020 when the Covid-19 pandemic started. I wasn’t able to activate the free health insurance though which covered illnesses like Covid-19 and dengue because I didn’t need it at that time. But after what happened to Mom, I thought that now was the perfect time to explore what Singlife has to offer.

I chose Singlife because it’s a low-risk investment, and yet offers higher coverage compared to HMOs (up to 100-120k only). But it is best to use the HMOs during medical emergencies. A lot of my friends tried to convince me to get a Sun Life insurance a few years ago (and until now), but I told them I’ll hold off getting one for now.

I guess these are the advantages of delayed gratification – you get to wait for a service or product to improve after some time, maximize the benefits later on, and get your money’s worth because there are now better options. My other reason for not getting Sun Life insurance is that my husband and I do not have kids. We don’t have beneficiaries in other words.

I am also apprehensive about getting one after what happened to previous insurance companies that went bankrupt, and policyholders weren’t able to get their invested funds back. Now that the US is heading toward another economic recession, I am unsure how these insurance companies will protect their policyholders’ funds that were invested in stocks and other volatile investments given the global economic outlook in the coming years.

Sun Life’s VUL insurances are a bit of a high-risk investment for me. Though I am considering getting their Business Owner Insurance Package later on God willing. I’m assuming this is one of their new insurance plans so this means conducting due diligence on my end and assessing how our family’s business could benefit from this insurance package. I’m considering it as another option that will add an extra layer of protection (buffer funds) to help sustain the business and recover in case of an economic collapse. Agripreneurs, by the way, can insure their businesses through the Philippine Crop Insurance Corporation under the Department of Agriculture.

As for Singlife, it offers more flexibility when it comes to monthly premiums. I tried the 100-in-1 Medical Plan, and I am looking into buying another plan (Cash for Medical Costs), which offers a higher monthly premium to increase my insurance coverage. But I’ll wait until the free KonsultaMD subscription of my first Singlife plan ends so it won’t overlap with the new plan.

My only prayer now is to find a way to share these unlimited consultations with some of the women in the BC support groups. How I wish I was allowed to schedule a doctor’s appointment on their behalf using my account. So my next task is to explore these opportunities and continue to look for more of them. As they say, when a door won’t open after you knocked, break it down. I’m kidding. We just keep on looking for more doors to open.

I am planning to share all about Singlife on social media because I believe this will help reduce the number of patients trying to avail the free medical services offered by public hospitals. Those who can afford to pay the monthly premiums offered by Singlife can choose a plan that fits their budget. The benefit of having one is that policyholders get to skip long lines and long waiting times to schedule laboratory tests and initial medical consultations (thru KonsultaMD) aside from the cash benefit that they can claim upon diagnosis of an illness and during hospitalization.

I am praying though that more doctors will sign up at KonsultaMD. We can expect more inquiries coming in and possibly more health insurance applications and medical consultations once I share this on social media. I also noticed there is 0-1 doctor only listed under some specializations. I hope there are still more doctors who can accommodate consultations via KonsultaMD in their schedules. Don’t worry Docs, we will try to ask (nonsensical) questions sparingly. ✌️

When it comes to the KonsultaMD app’s overall interface, it is very user-friendly. It is also easy to access and switch from one app feature to the other. And I love the portion of the app where they have a list of comprehensive medical checkup packages (prices included) classified according to gender, age, and illness. I find this very helpful because I plan to have my executive checkup soon though I am feeling well right now, and it’s next on my to-do list after I send off ze hubby. In summary, our best option to safeguard our assets, investments, and life savings when we get sick is to maximize what we can benefit from our HMO, health insurance, and PhilHealth.

And yes, we also never stop looking for opportunities to offer help in any way we can, especially to those who are in dire need of medical assistance. I agree with Prof. Samar Aoun, one of the speakers at the recently held webinar hosted by the European Association for Palliative Care, when she emphasized the need for reflective practice by addressing social needs (identifying the circumstances surrounding the need) and not just look into the pathological lens when it comes to understanding and dealing with patients.

To end this article, here’s my favorite quotation by Edward Everett Hale that hopefully will encourage us all to keep on doing what is good and what is best for everyone:

“I am only one, but I am one; I cannot do everything, but I can do something. What I can do I ought to do, and what I ought to do, by God’s grace, I will do.”

P.S. God’s surprises never end here. Stay tuned for my next post. 🙂

Clinics And Little Boy

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Oh Manila, must you be so hostile to me? I never said I hated you. I only said we’re not compatible. lol Must you punish me for telling the truth? 😅

I’ve been here in Manila for only a week and here I am paying a visit to the clinic because of my skin rashes that do not subside and swollen lymph nodes. This is actually my body’s way of telling me that it’s fighting some sort of infection.

Doctors Are Out, The Boy Is In

Unfortunately, Gen med doctors aren’t available, booking a Grab to get to the nearest clinic is taking so long, and it’s already 2 PM, so I decided to go home. While contemplating on whether to commute via Grab, taxi, or public transportation, I decided to sit on a bench. Then a little boy sat beside me. I noticed from my peripheral vision that he can’t sit still so I thought he might have mild ADHD.

But then I also observed that it looked like he wanted to talk to me but was hesitating maybe because his parents warned him to never talk to strangers. lol So I looked at him and he smiled his sweetest smile at me and said “Hi.” I smiled my sweetest back at him too and I couldn’t help but laugh silently.

This handsome boy is quite a natural charmer. lol And he’s only about 6 or 7 years old. 😄 From my experience as a former grade school SpEd teacher, children don’t normally approach strangers and say “Hi” to them. So maybe I reminded him of his Mom.

Then his grandmother called him, and I also decided to go home via public transportation and took a jeepney. Because the traffic is worse going to my sister’s condo, I just decided to get off halfway through the trip and walked the remaining 1.9 km.

Physical Activity For A Better Body

It’s a good thing I did that because my body seemed to be craving for it. I felt a lot better and the symptoms subsided and I couldn’t explain how it happened (what the what? 😀). I love walking, by the way. Maybe because I was used to doing it back in UP Diliman when I was a college student. I remember walking more than 2 kilometers just to get to my next class when jeepneys were taking too long to arrive.

Back in my hometown, I am always going around doing something. Roaming around the farm is also similar to doing a 1-day hike. And at home, I do a lot of household chores because our house help is currently unable to work due to health concerns. I pray she’ll be able to come back next year because a big house is really hard to maintain. I just don’t know how Mom managed everything perfectly at home. (Oh, Mom. I missed you terribly.)

Anyway, it was a good thing I was wearing comfy gym clothes, so I was able to enjoy brisk walking going to the condo. And I can’t help but smile again. God surely knows how to cheer me up because though I wasn’t able to accomplish what I needed to do for the day, a handsome little boy put a smile back on my face.

A Trip To The Vet Clinic

It’s as if God was reminding me to never be anxious about everything. Just a couple of weeks ago, I got extremely worried when Peekah, our orange cat, couldn’t close her mouth, and she was drooling nonstop.

I thought she was going through some sort of paralysis. So I urged my sister that we bring her to the vet ASAP. Peekah seemed to have sensed my anxiety, she hid under my bed and only came out when I offered her cat treats.

When we reached the vet clinic, Doc JM checked her mouth and almost laughingly told us that it was only because of a loose tooth, and it was about to come off. lol Oh, you tooth. I almost had a heart attack because of you. 😅 I was so worried that I might also lose Peekah this year.

I was like, Lord, not now, please. I already lost so much. And yet not my will but Your will be done even if it is too painful. Doc JM told me that he can ease Peekah’s discomfort by extracting her tooth but she has to be sedated. The thing is, she’s already a senior cat – I got her in 2013. So he advised that we monitor her condition first and if the problem persisted, we bring her to the clinic again. Thankfully, Peekah was back to her normal self the next day as if nothing happened. And I don’t know how she got her tooth out. 😅

Peekah, btw, is an adopted stray cat from the streets of Cubao when we were still renting an apartment there in 2013. She was a tiny kitten back then when I adopted her and her sister. Unfortunately, her sister died unexpectedly a year later. I was glad though I brought them to my hometown because they got to explore the outdoors more often.

To wrap this up, everything ends well when we trust God to move on our behalf. As for that handsome little prince charming, I hope to see him again one day. Because I wanted to tell him this, “You melted my heart with your cute smile and sweet “Hi” and turned my bad day into a happy one – I’ll never forget you and that day.” ❤️

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7

A Healthy Self-Care: When God Says ‘Rest’

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Our bodies are like a rose. When it wilts, it loses its beauty and its essence. When our health fails, we lose vigor and vitality. I was prompted to write this article after feeling down under the weather the past days – a call for a healthy self-care.

To Rest is Not A Sin

I have this allergic rhinitis where I sneeze almost every hour accompanied by a runny nose. There’s a flu going around too and I think it triggered the attacks.

A few days back I experienced shortness of breath and chest pain and I asked my husband if it’s a panic attack or was it asthma. He told me to monitor the symptoms first. We have a history of asthma in the family and allergies and I used to have skin asthma or eczema. After a consultation with my derma, one of the triggering factors is stress and my first eczema outbreak happened back in college when I was trying to finish my undergrad thesis.

It’s been almost two years since the last time I had an outbreak. But now, I noticed that every time my immune system is low, my soles become very itchy especially when I eat something that contains allergens. It’s just so itchy you pretty much would like to crack your soles open and see where that itch is coming from. After the itch is gone, the soles of your feet will have dry, scaly skin – an indication that it went through a ‘rough’ battle. One of my sisters has this condition, by the way, that started back when she’s just a kid.

Only We Can Feel What Goes On in Our Bodies

I have a high threshold for pain. I can tolerate severe migraine attacks or very itchy feet without taking painkillers. But now, I am also allergic to some painkillers and I am close to believing I really have a weak immune system by genetic composition.

I told my husband I can sense that something is wrong with my body. I am also feeling pain in certain parts of my right breast and I don’t want to give myself a scare but it calls for one mandatory checkup in the family that I’ve been stalling for years now – mammogram. You may read this article about the history of breast cancer in my family.

Healing By Faith and Science

Succumb. Let Science play its role for now. Because for how many years I’ve been trying to leave it all to faith. ☺

Just like me and my husband’s attempts to have a child for 3 years now. He believes it is about time we seek for professional help and be at peace whatever the results may be.

We are scheduled to have a thorough checkup with an ob-gyn tomorrow and I plan to have a mammogram by the end of the month. I am stalling the PE too required at work because let’s just say I’ve been evasive of everything ‘medical’ the past years. Not because I am fearful of the results but I am believing that God will heal me by faith alone.

But then again, I know sooner or later I just have to go through these medical checkups most especially when symptoms are too visible to disregard and they disrupt my daily routine. It can really become too much of a hassle and an inconvenience.

I actually told my husband that I have the will power to still do things despite my weak physical condition because I am very strong-willed. But when it’s your body that starts failing you, that’s where doing things become really hard.

Our bodies are a vessel. Without it, we can do nothing. Our sense of purpose in this world comes from our ability to do things physically and a deteriorating vessel will be of no use. Except perhaps to fulfill a purpose that only God knows and only God will reveal in His perfect time.

For now, God is asking for a healthy self-care. He’s been asking for years. And did I say that I am just too plain stubborn? 😀

Now obeying and resting when God says so,

“A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength.” – Proverbs 17:22

P.S.

The roses were given to me by hubby dear last Valentine’s Day and methinks they are too pretty to just let them wilt. So here goes my appreciation by including them here. 😊

Look At The Red Light

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“Look at the red light…”

That was what my surgeon, Dr. Ang, would tell me when I had my femtosecond lasik surgery on both eyes as a study patient at Asian Eye Institute last November 2013. I was overjoyed upon hearing I passed the initial screening considering I am a myopic with a 7.50 grade on both eyes, a .25 astigmatism on my right eye and my test results confirmed I have a thin cornea. This proposed as a problem among the research team as any miscalculation during the surgery will be considered fatal. Yes, I am what eye experts would call as legally blind. It was my very first surgery and I was extremely nervous. It is actually very ironic because I have never been confined in a hospital, never loved the idea, and yet there I was having my eye surgery – 100% conscious. 🙂

My brother accompanied me to AEI and stayed there until the time came that I was ushered into the clean room 30 minutes prior to prepare for the procedure. Drops were placed on my eyes and I cannot give you the specifics as to what kind of drops they were. (Sorry, I am not a medical professional.) 😉

While waiting, I saw nothing except for a blur because I am not wearing my eyeglasses anymore. I was sitting pretty and comfy then my name was called. A nurse guided me inside the operating room and I could not even see where the procedure will take place. Oh poor eyesight, poor me indeed.

I just sat and lied down where they instructed me and I sort of relied on my other senses for most of the session – sense of touch most definitely and my sense of hearing. Then I heard my doctor’s voice explaining what we are about to go through and I just nodded staring at the ceiling. Or something else? I am not so sure as I really could not tell because everything was really a blur.

Then came the squishy water poured over my eyes and I could see a bright light, probably the ones used during surgical procedures. A machine hovered over my eyes and I felt pressure. They did this for each eye then I saw a thin piece of metal being inserted to clip my eyelids which would prevent my eyes from closing during the operation. Then more liquid came gushing into my eyes and what I remembered next was a very thin and tiny piece of rod used to scrape my cornea and to lift it up.

After they did this, I totally saw nothing. It was all white, not even silhouettes or shadows. Then came Dr. Ang’s words reminding me to look at the red light. That was the time they started using the laser to correct the shape of my cornea and enhance my visual acuity. I could smell burning flesh. It is a good thing though I didn’t throw up but I am so close to panic mode with a heartbeat racing faster than the normal. Now this is probably the reason why Dr. Ang would always remind me to look at the red light. My eyes are trying to look for something. That was my first feeling on how it is to be completely blind. Almost complete darkness but I can see no lines, no movement, no anything except for a very faint red light from a distance which I so tried to search and focus on.

Just like the Truth and the Light.

Imagine yourself in a dark, deep pit. You see nothing around you, tried to grope around you but the darkness is too overwhelming it suffocates your entire being. It clings on to you as if of a cloak that you cannot just take off every time you want to. Then you see a very, very tiny light from afar. So tiny you would find it difficult to focus on.

BUT then again, you are too scared to let that light pass you by so you stared at it far too long. You reached out your hand to take hold of it so it wouldn’t escape you. Then just as sudden as you have reached out your hand, the light started to become bigger and bigger. Until you felt yourself being lifted slowly, bit by bit, out of that dark, deep pit.

Alas, you saw the light. You now see everything more clearly. And it was a wonderful feeling. Until now, it still is.

No longer will you settle to be surrounded by darkness but you will try harder to search for that light. Every time the claws of darkness will take hold of you, you try every effort and every ounce of strength in you to escape it. Because you know that “at the end of every tunnel there comes light.”

A guiding force will lead you out of the struggle – out of the pit, out of the darkness. A force that is more powerful than anything in this world. The force came in the form of a man. The man who, though was brought to pain and suffering, became the light that shone all through mankind. The light that can never be extinguished, that stood shining above all peril in all its darkness.

Jesus Christ was and is that Light.

Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” – John 14:6

He came to be with us, because He loved us first. As I savor in this light, I know my love for Him will be my passage to reclaiming that light in moments that it becomes dim. But I know for certain, it will never diminish and for as long as I see that light, there is hope. And I will cling on to that until the Lord’s work in me is done.

I live for only one thing – to glorify my God, the living Father. He lives in you and me. Do not depart from the light, seek it with all your heart. Then, you will know how it really feels to be saved and to be loved. 🙂