Serious Talks: Insurgencies and Helping Hands

Posted on March 2, 2018 by Christine Lailani

As you all know I barely touch on political and social issues here on my blog. This is also the reason why the articles before this are pretty “light.” I intended to organize them in this manner because today’s article is heavy reading. Definitely not heavy reading similar to academic or scholastic reading but let’s just say most points are all serious talks. 🙂

Another reason why I also skip covering these topics is that they are highly debatable. I love to hear varying and opposing views because you get to see both sides of the coin. However, when it becomes a heated discussion that leads to an argument, there is a tendency for the discussion to go off-topic. This is with the exception of debate teams, of course. They were trained how to keep their arguments well within the premises of the discussion and topic on hand.

On the contrary, when I share about faith, my appeal is usually reflective and personal. Yes, no one can question your experiences or what you have learned from your experiences. It is your story, you own it, nobody can nullify your “arguments.” Unless, of course, if it is a rebuke by the Spirit in cases where your testimony contains any of these – arrogance, pride, selfishness, self-entitlement, etc. and never in a way brings glory to God but glory to self.

Sometimes the Spirit’s leading brings me to topics that I would like to swerve away from but found myself writing about it just like now. So before I wrote this post, I asked God’s leading that I may choose the right words (never to condemn anyone) to let the message across. By the way, as of writing, it is Sunday but I will post it Friday. The tugging already came in now. 😉

Yet another reason why I don’t post heavy political writings is that I graduated from a university stereotyped as the university where most student activists were born and made – the University of the Philippines (Diliman). I cannot junk this statement either as truth or fallacy. It is partly true and it is partly false. I love my alma mater. I owe so much from this academe though it brought me bittersweet experiences. On a broader perspective, it made me to who I am now – just like faith.

Now for this one, a current issue about UP students becoming activists and doing nothing but to rally on the streets instead of focusing on their studies became the limelight of Facebook newsfeed as of the late. I read extremely derogatory accusations targeted towards the entire community of UP. I wanted to defend my alma mater. But I chose to keep mum about it on social media.

Why, Tin?

I know there are so many things that are beyond our control much more the human reactions and the human thoughts. I can never force people to understand where I came from and why my sentiments are such in those matters. Even if, let’s say, my sentiments have so much more bearing because I have first-hand experiences about growing up and living in the UP community as an “Iskolar ng Bayan.”

Iskolar ng Bayan – that is the second name UP students go by. Translated into English, we are scholars wherein our education is funded by the state. We were the high school students all over the Philippines who qualified by passing a mind-boggling entrance exam in layman’s terms. 😉 Our education is not free. But we pay low tuition fees for a good quality of education. Yes, UP is considered as one of the premier state universities in the country.

Not all of us are activists who rally on the streets. But all of us are ACTIVISTS BY HEART. The indoctrination of the university to serve the country as a way of giving back to the privilege of having scholarships granted to us lies embedded deep within us. It taught us resilience, to fight for what is right, to defend those who can’t, and to help those in need.

If there is one factor that I appreciate being an alumna of this university, it is the fact that I first became aware of the social and political issues when I was a college student back in 2002. The social experience and acculturation of the UP spirit are more defined and rooted among the undergraduates than on those who studied in the campus for their graduate studies. I guess this is self-explanatory? But I’ll explain it anyhow. 😀

Graduate students commonly meet once a week only and are not required to be involved with the university’s non-academic student functions and affairs. The only exception is when it is the grad student’s personal interest to immerse in those activities voluntarily. It is more likely too that grad students are preoccupied with a day job. Whereas if you’re an undergrad student, the peer pressure is greater. When your college friends started joining organizations, attending UP concerts, hanging out in dorms, etc., you are more or less forced to join the crowd.

This is the UP culture itself. It urged me to look beyond the social dogma and to learn how to work hand in hand with fellow students from all walks of life may it be the son of a senator or the daughter of a farmer. I became aware what the society is lacking, what the government is trying to do, and how the entire citizens are faring. And what can you, as students and in your own little way, give back to help?

We are not all activists who rally on the streets. BUT we are all aiming to become CATALYSTS OF SOCIAL CHANGE. Now, these two are completely different. An activist opposes a particular system, rule, or law and DEMANDS CHANGE. But catalysts of social change are those who, in their little power, INITIATE CHANGE and make the world a better place. Yes, not just my country. But it is very well a good advocacy to help those around you first, right? This is where the community comes in.

Rallies are the same as insurgencies. It is always an upheaval against the current way of governance regardless of who is the appointed leader. When we decided to utilize a property whether it is for commercial purposes or not, we are faced with one particular challenge – dealing with insurgencies and revolutionary taxes.

When I was a kid, I am already aware what “revolutionary taxes” are for. My dad, as a farmer and an engineer, gives these so-called “revolutionary taxes” along with other farmers and business owners in our town. They are an amount of money provided to the CPP-NPA or the Communist Party of the Philippines- New People’s Army.

They are very active in the provinces. Sometimes we hear news of people being shot point blank in public and rumors going around that the person was killed because that person committed an offense to someone. Then that someone sought justice and help from the NPA.

We do not condone such practices but sadly, it has already become the norm. When I asked Dad back when I was a child why we have to give, he just said it is mandatory. If you can’t pay the revolutionary taxes, they usually resort to destroying your establishments or property if you are a business owner. I asked Dad who these people are. He said that they are the ones who protect the people. If I interpreted it right, the people’s hope and savior.

When I was a little girl, I have always loved the idea of your “Knight in Shining Armor.” Ah yes, who among the ladies wouldn’t be bedazzled with that? Even guys loved the idea of having saviors like a superhero – the one who saved the world. Marvel has so much of that. 😉

But I also thought, the wrong notion of “saviors” and “salvation” can actually lead to even more lost lives, more chaos, more war, more pain, more hunger, and more poverty. Countries where there is zero violence, like Norway, are the richest countries all over the world (Source: http://fortune.com/2017/11/17/richest-country-in-the-world/). But in countries where war is anywhere but there, there are all sorts of endless social problems from hunger, poverty, illnesses, to murder, crimes, robbery, etc.

Salvation is an ideology to some. Society may not tackle it like how the church does but at some point, the church has a greater responsibility in informing the public what TRUE SALVATION is and who is the RIGHTFUL SAVIOR. It definitely is not our President who can save us from all the calamities that will befall our land and neither can it be the “Knight in Shining Armor” no matter how shiny his shield is. Salvation is never ideological but experiential. You will never know salvation if you haven’t been in a situation where you truly sought for God’s help because no one else can help you.

Going back to businesses, businesses are there to help communities. It helps build a community and a society in fact. Where there is revenue, there is commerce. Where there is commerce, there is an industry. Where there is an industry, there is manpower and livelihood. Destroy the businesses, the livelihood, and the communities, everything else will follow. Where there is destruction, there is hopelessness. People look for “saviors” who can lift them out of their desolate situations.

A changed life surrendered to the rightful Savior in the name of Jesus Christ will result in the salvation of a community. Bring that one person home and surely his influences will go on to his children, grandchildren, etc. When it becomes magnified, it can change a community. It is easier said than done but think of Jesus, Pilates, and the Romans. Jesus instilled change, Jesus was considered an “insurgent,” and many opposed it which brought Him to His death on the Cross. But little did everyone know that it was the kind of death which magnified Him as the Son of God and the power of God, Himself. This is now the HOPE that we cling on to.

Helping people cross over. 🙂 Photo copyright: istock.com

My prayer now is for God to lead us in helping communities progress through our sustainable projects not just with the livelihood, but to shed light upon who is the ultimate Savior – the one who died on the Cross for us. May more minds and eyes are opened and more hearts be touched, may it be in whatever medium that God will use as His instrument for the Good News to break through. Yes, we can only do so little in helping others compared to how God can completely transform the life of one human being, of one community, of one nation, and ultimately, of the world.

By the way, this is supposed to be a Holy Week special but I thought about posting it earlier since most of us will have our own moments of reflection during the week. 🙂

I just hope this article will remind us how to commemorate what took place on the Cross hundreds of years ago and how we can all be catalysts of social change through God’s grace and guidance. May His Saving power allow us all to fulfill the tasks set out before us in His perfect time – how we will carry our own crosses. ❤

“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, and you will be My witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” – Acts 1:8

“And then He told them, “Go into all the world and preach the Good News to everyone.” – Mark 16:15

P.S.

If you aren’t sure how or where to get started in initiating change, start by helping fund a student’s education. Some of the organizations listed in the left panel (web version) or lower portion (mobile version) of my website help kids get a scholarship. You can also ask your local church if they sponsor outreach activities and medical missions to communities. Or if you know a certain family, reach out to them. Helping doesn’t necessarily have to involve money. You can help by offering emotional and spiritual support through mentoring or even by prayers. Yes, never underestimate the power of prayers. 🙂

Also, these serious talks won’t be complete without this – it is Dad’s 78th birthday today! To honor him, I made him a portrait sketch which looked like he is in his 40s. 😀 Ah yes, may the good Lord bless the work of his hands, give him good health, protection, and strength in the coming years. ❤ ❤ ❤

“Daddy” (9″ x 12″ Pencil Sketch)

Knowing Your Purpose: Are You a Godpreneur?

Posted on February 9, 2018 by Christine Lailani

Disclaimer: This is a pretty long message but you’ll enjoy reading the rest of it (I think or I think not). 😀 If you do feel sleepy in the middle though, you may skip the boring ones and just get on to the next pile of stories. 😉

“Are you a Godpreneur?”

Yes, I am a Godpreneur…..in the making. That is, for me and my siblings. 😀

But first, thanks be to God for restoring our landline and wi-fi connection from super slow to nothing last week to just right fast now. Just in time for me to prepare for this article yesterday, write, and post it today. Btw, 1mb for me is fast enough. lol 😀 If you are wondering too if I have no work assigned today, yep, God allowed it my Thursday and Friday be free for this week so I could research and prepare for this article.

So what is a Godpreneur? This might be the first time you’ve heard of it. If you have read my post entitled An Ode to My Grandpa: Memoirs, that was the first time I mentioned the term “Godpreneur.”

This is the website where I encountered the term first: http://www.dailygodpreneur.com/. When I checked it out, I can only say that indeed, this is what I need for this season. I’d like to reiterate what the owner of Daily Godpreneur said regarding the importance of reading your bible on a daily basis every morning. I do that every day too since I got saved in 2013. It is such a vital process if you want to know what God’s will is for you and in knowing your calling. Here’s how my journal/planner looks like – a combination of daily bible verses, daily devotionals, and prayers:

Try writing in cursive, it is becoming rare nowadays. 🙂

But before I went to that website, I first got a glimpse of it through IG in its random Search feed where it collates similar photos based on your likes. Most of my liked photos are about bible verses so I thought maybe it got integrated with it. It captured my attention (God’s plan for sure) and I checked out the IG profile. At that time, I just came back from my hometown where hubby and I spent our Christmas vacation.

You may download his e-book for free: “How to Become a Godpreneur and Let God Be Your CEO.” 😍

After the prayer and fasting, this became one of the topics that the Spirit prompted me to write about – An Ode to My Grandpa: Memoirs. I wrote the article, shared it on Facebook, and tagged my siblings. I did mention in the article I have no idea how to utilize the land without the finances to back it up. The next thing that happened, we were all making serious plans about it. Literally serious plans. 🙂

When I wrote that article I guess I was praying to God that if this is His will over me and my family, may He lead the way and prepare us all for the tasks beforehand. Now, when I look back to the decisions I made, the sacrifices my husband and I had to go through, it seems the pieces of the puzzle are starting to fall into place though the entire picture is nowhere near completion.

Everything made sense.

All you need to do is just let go and let God, again and again and again. 🙂 Part of the sacrifices and hard decisions I mentioned is letting go of an opportunity to be promoted to a Managing Editor and earn 30-40k which could’ve brought me and my husband to such great relief financially. But when I prayed to God about it, the question He asked was this, “What is your motivation, Tin, for getting the promotion?”

Don’t get me wrong though, I absolutely love my job now as a freelance content writer. I never enjoyed any work I did in my previous jobs than how I do now. I love how my work demanded versatility as a writer with all the different clients and specific demands we have to deal with. But my reason is mainly that I didn’t feel it in my heart to take on the responsibility. If my motivation is the high salary, we all know it is the wrong motivation. I may be ready to take on editing roles, however, managing people is my waterloo. I wasn’t prepared so to speak and I felt it isn’t God’s perfect time either.

But hear ye, hear ye. God hears prayers even those little voices that our hearts tend to whisper because we are unaware we’re praying for them already. This article (http://www.dailygodpreneur.com/disciplining-employees/) yet again from Daily Godpreneur came just in time along with so many articles that I can totally relate now. I can’t help sharing them with my siblings too. In one instance, my brother mentioned in one of our meetings that if we are to venture into this business, it is not going to be for profit. We all agreed to it.

I also suggested we can use parts of the land as a retreat area and for the vacation home, God already gave us ideas how it should look like. For example, I got this idea of putting tables with bible verses on top of it when we ate at Mary Grace restaurant. Nothing is more spiritually rejuvenating during your retreat than being surrounded by the exact Words of God while communing with nature which is God’s creation at its best, right? 🙂

I was also hooked on this survival game called Ocean is Home. I loved it because the setting is on a deserted island (nature). But the good thing is that you get to design and build your own house just like a real architect’s AutoCAD. I know you’re going to laugh at me if I tell you that I actually made a floor plan for the game like what real architects do. lol 😀

Just to share though, this is common in the family. When I was young, I always see my Mom making floor plans. Both Mom (grade school teacher) and Dad (civil engineer) designed our ancestral house. I also have a cousin (mother side) who’s an architect and yet another cousin (father’s side) who’s a talented painter and artist. So I guess sketching and floor plans are quite a normal thing to do in the fam either by profession or as a hobby. 😉

Back to the game, I took screenshots of it after how many days of building it. Then suddenly an idea popped into my head and blurted it out to my hubby: “Hon, do you think it’ll be a great idea if I show this to my siblings as one suggestion for the design of the vacation home?” What do you think? 😀 I highly recommend this game if you’re into building stuff.

My eldest sister also suggested the idea of using our business to provide a livelihood in our community. The farmers and their families living near the property which we plan to utilize have work depending on the planting and harvest season only. This means they need to look for other jobs to sustain their families during the times they have no farm work. These farmers and their families have been serving our families for decades since we were young and even way before that when it was my late grandpa who was managing the farm.

We would like to pay it forward by serving them and their needs too. I did mention in my previous articles that God placed a desire in my heart to put up my own school someday and a foundation that will help students without the financial capability to have a good education. This is actually the reason why I pursued a master’s degree in Special Education altho halfway through my grad study, I did let the opportunity go because God led me to a different path. If it is still God’s will for me to put up a school, this could still materialize how many years or decades from now in the property which we plan to utilize.

I was born a people-pleaser. My Mom once told me it isn’t a good thing. But thinking about it in a Christian context, I believe being a people-pleaser is actually good. Only this time the one I am pleasing is not people but God. How? By serving others not to earn my way to Heaven or receive a reward from God but to fulfill His tasks and to share what He has given me.

My siblings and I have been gifted with skills and resources despite some setbacks and I know they are for a purpose and never for self-gain. All of us, I believe, have been gifted with certain talents and skills because we all compose the body of Christ – everyone has a specific role to play. Just like how 5 of us, siblings, have a special part to fulfill to make our project work. But then again, use it never for self-gain. If God gifted you with so many talents and skills, then He has greater work for you to do.

One of the famous entrepreneurs in history and Microsoft founder Bill Gates also said the same thing:

Biblically speaking, it can be found in this verse:

“…When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.” – Luke 12:48

Speaking of skills, you’ll never know when God will use them for His purposes. It doesn’t mean you have to go through the same experiences others did so you’d “activate” them. But it is all between you and God. He will use circumstances only designed for you and you alone because that is part of His blueprint when He designed you to fulfill a certain task – your calling. Do not try to copy how others lived and what they pursued because that is God’s calling for their lives. If we will always follow what others are doing WITHOUT consulting God FIRST, we are wasting away what God has prepared for us which, as we all know, is always the best. ❤

You may want to check this one out too. Every time I write my Friday article or even articles at work, I listen to worship songs. I sometimes play my guitar and my husband’s guitar as my icebreaker away from any screen (mobile phone or laptop).

So I browsed the internet one time for chords and lyrics of some worship songs I heard during a Sunday service. Voila, I stumbled upon this awesome website and it’s just the perfect site I was looking for. You’ll find most worship songs here with chords, lyrics, and tabs along with music videos and interviews with the composers and songwriters themselves. I am pretty sure they, too, have their own set of testimonials which led them to pursue God’s calling for them.

http://worshiptogether.com/songs/broken-vessels-amazing-grace/

Yes, they are all using their gifts, talents, and skills to fulfill God’s calling for them. Just like our very own Filipina composer, musician, and singer (a beautiful lady too), sis Moira Dela Torre. Here’s her original composition entitled Safe now featured in Victory Worship’s new album. Can you guess what the title of the album is? You guessed that right, “For Your Purpose.” Amazing, isn’t it? 😀

You may watch her acoustic version in the video below:

Going back to God’s purpose, my husband and I are going to relocate yet again to a new place soon which, I am sure, is part of God’s plans too. We have a lot of people to be grateful for in this season and I just can’t help thanking God for them every single day. Along with it also came great opportunities. I already have hints how the plans will play out but I can’t say it is exactly what will happen. Simply because I am not God and “His ways are higher than mine and so are His thoughts higher than my thoughts.” 😀

So finding out what my hints are is something for you to look forward to. I’ll share if my instincts, guesses, foresight, prophecy, ESP, whatever term you may call it, are correct. So stay tuned for my next Friday article. 😀

Also, yesterday a bible verse for the day popped up from my screen courtesy of BibleScreen.com which ignited something that I have been trying to figure out but at a loss what was it. The word came out – prosperity of the wicked. I decided to type it into Google search and ended up reading bible study websites which pointed me to Psalm 37. Upon reading it, Psalm 37 encapsulated what I think now is God’s way of preparing us – how to deal with the money and success through God’s way since we are going to put up a business which, as we all know, is greatly involved with money. Money is the root of all evil, that is a given too. So God made a step ahead to guard our hearts against finding the wrong motive.

For now, I know I am in towards a whole new set of different seasons and I am feeling scary ( no, I should not be) but I have these verses to equip the journey ahead. Yes, God will pave the way too and I need not worry. 🙂

“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.” – Exodus 20:12

“You shall walk in all the ways which the Lord has commanded you, that you may live and that it may be well with you, and that you may prolong your days in the land which you shall possess.” – Deuteronomy 5:33

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” – John 15:5

“You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will prevail.” – Proverbs 19:21

“Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and He will establish your plans.” – Proverbs 16:3

“Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need.” – Matthew 6:33

“The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” – Deuteronomy 31:8

“For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” – Philippians 4:13

“Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” – Matthew 19:6

P.S.

I hope these verses gave you the armor you needed too in whatever quest or crusade you’re set to journey on. The same goes when it comes to discovering the purpose that God has set for you to fulfill. Let’s all pray for God’s leading, our Master in everything, and claim the beautiful promises that He has for you, for me, and for the rest.

“Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take.” – Proverbs 3:6

From God’s journeyman with love,

Tin ❤

What Matters

Posted on January 26, 2018 by Christine Lailani

Friday blog post is here! 😀 I guess I need to start every Friday’s blog post with an attitude of gratitude thanking God who gives me the Grace always. 😉 Why? It seldom happens that I am idle and doing nothing. This means I need to find time for my blog and of course, find time for God. 😉 But as always, hindi Nya ako binibigo. Lagi Syang nandyan para alalayan ako.

For the most part of this article, English ang gagamitin kong lenggwahe. ‘Yun ay dahil ni-copy and paste ko lang sila from the caption of my photos over Instagram and tweaked it a bit para maging isang article. 😀

The gist of this article revolves around last holidays’ events (still) since I was hibernating for almost a month in the blogosphere. So, here goes my story. 🙂

I am sure a holiday never passes by na wala tayong natatanggap na regalo. Kahit sabihin nating konti lamang natanggap natin, meron at meron pa din tayong natanggap. However, in my case, I don’t go about counting how many gifts I received. I am even fine in case I don’t receive any.

Why? Let’s just say I am never materialistic because my love language is quality time. I appreciate gifts not based on their worth or brand but based on the sentimental value. Yet I never fail to appreciate all of them because I know they’ve been given thoughtfully.

To our beloved families and friends, our deepest thank you for all your time and effort to shower us with these gifts. This gives us all the more reason to pay it forward. So if you see me using branded stuff, they are not a personal choice but are gifts. 😉

Next in line was the holiday feast – yes, the food coma. *burp* I have made a promise that during the holiday season, one of my ways to express my love for God is to serve others. The best way to serve your family is through the tummy, right? 😃

Though it’s hard to pull off several dishes (chicken skewers, shrimp scampi, embutido, stuffed roasted chicken, beef broccoli, leche flan – not in the pic), I am just grateful to my assistant chefs (Ate Boden and hubby dear) for helping me out in the kitchen. But most importantly, I give thanks to God for giving me the grace to do it. ☝❤

“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” – 1 Peter 4:10

This was the reason why I was hibernating on social media during the holiday season. I was very busy in the kitchen because having good food on the table means longer conversations a.k.a. meaningful, priceless moments with the family. This is something that social media can never offer – genuine moments and memories made along with your loved ones.

The cake’s not mine though because baking’s not my cup of tea. I am also not a lover of cakes but my Mom is the ultimate fan so there went Goldilocks’ Rocky Road. 😀

For the latter part of the holidays and the early part of January, hubby and I spent quality time with my second sister, Ate Ayn, and her Norwegian hubby, Kuya TK (they recently got married! Yay!). One of these photos was taken after our church service at Victory Fort.

Ah yes, this is just one of my answered prayers for my second sister – to have a lifelong companion who will be her prayer partner and who will share in her ups and downs, in sickness and in health ’til death parts them both. I am just grateful for this especially since she lives in Norway and we have no relatives there.

Indeed Lord, despite all the troubles we faced, You always give us a reason to smile, be grateful, and know Your goodness. Thank You for everything You’ve done for me, my hubby, and our families. All of us will remain to worship You as our one and only GOD in our lives.

Real treasures aren’t really those that are tangible but those that lay hidden in the depths of our souls and our hearts. They are what matters to God.

“..but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the Word, making it unfruitful.” – Mark 4:19

May we all not be pierced with so many sorrows brought about by the complexities of our own worldly choices. But may our minds be renewed so we can live in utmost freedom savoring the very essence of salvation – the priceless, most beautiful gift we have received and we can ever receive. ❤

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” – Romans 12:2

So this is it! This wraps up the Friday article for this week and I am wishing everyone a blessed weekend ahead! 🙂

From God’s daughter with love,

Tin ❤

It’s 2018!

Posted on January 13, 2018 by Christine Lailani

Fiery 2018 New Year date with sparkling trails

Photo credit: Christmas Stock Images

Hello, everyone! I am back and I am sooooo excited to be back! I have so many things to post (all saved as drafts on my phone) and yet so little time! 😉

I am actually on bed rest because I caught the flu bug and I’ve been sick for almost two weeks now. I easily get sick but I prefer not to take meds and train my body to boost its own immune system. Anyway, I still want to make good use of my idle time while I still have the free time. Thus, the post. 😀

So, if you’ve been following my blog for quite some time now, I usually don’t have a blog entry in the month of December for 2 reasons – it is my birth month and busy holidays. I also take this time off from social media as my own year-ender fasting in deep retrospect.

Speaking of fasting, I think you all know we also have a week-long fasting in our church at the beginning of every year. So the January blog entry is, for me, VERY spiritual and personal. 🙂

No, I won’t cry a river in this post like I did the past years. But if I do shed a tear, that tear is precious. It speaks volume of the countless blessings and answered prayers I had back in 2017.

Ah yes, the Lord is GOOD! Freedom from the stronghold of the enemy, freedom at its finest, indeed. 🙂

2018 is FREEDOM. 🙂

Yes, the year 2017 fared fairly well for me and my hubby and our families. We did have some setbacks but the year ended with such a pretty awesome bang. What I meant by a “bang” is one major prayer request being answered – restoration of broken relationships through sincere forgiveness. Not mine though, God answered it at the beginning of the year 2017. But this is for people we’ve been praying for.

Thus, I just smiled my widest ever smile when on the first day of our prayer and fasting in church, I randomly saw this after accompanying my sister and bro-in-law at the airport:

God is good all the time, all the time God is good. 🙂

The tangible assurance is there. God is always with us – Emmanuel. This is the reason for the season as they say. Personally though, I celebrate Jesus’ birth every single day. I thank Him every day for the greatest gift I have received from the Father which is salvation. December 25 for me is just a widespread, massive, collaborative celebration of the Savior’s birth worldwide.

Since I got saved back in 2013, I have seen the works of the Lord not just in me but through the people around me and even with the nations. I have learned since that year until now the very essence of Ecclesiastes 3, the joy of patiently waiting on the Lord, the complete trust, and the faith that we have such a great God though what we see around is the complete opposite.

I do not intend to make this post a very long one like my previous January posts. But that is only because I intend to write short posts once a week. The prayer and fasting at the beginning of this year imprinted on me these verses:

“Do not neglect the spiritual gift you received through the prophecy spoken over you when the elders of the church laid their hands on you.” – 1 Timothy 4:14

“Give your complete attention to these matters. Throw yourself into your tasks so that everyone will see your progress.” – 1 Timothy 4: 15

This blog came alive right after I got saved. A very trying circumstance prompted me to make one. I made this first out of a need then, later on, I realized God used that circumstance and turned it around to serve His purpose. This blog now serves as the “megaphone” for my faith.

No, I dare not turn my back from my calling – sharing of faith-based testimonials through this blog. God knows there is a possibility I will because of other priorities. But God demands He remains the #1. Thus, the reminders. 🙂

From me, my hubby and our families, let’s all claim for a fruitful 2018 come what may and cheers to more upcoming posts that will glorify His Name!

“As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” – Joshua 24:15

The Ginete Family (missing Ate Ayn and her hubby) with our 94-year old maternal grandma. 🙂

The Ginete Family, now reunited with Ate Ayn and her hubby but still missing another sibling and our parents. 😀

The Rome Family missing my Dad-in-law. 🙂

Always remember, our God is ALWAYS WITH US. Seek Him and you will find Him. ❤

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” – John 15:5

P.S.

My future posts will be written through a mash-up of my native language (Filipino) and English. We have a very rich language and the Spirit also imprinted I use it often. I am sure Google Translator will do a fantastic job of translating them for you all. Or better yet, you can try learning our language too. I say, “yes” to the latter. 😉

Make Praying Your Daily Habit

Posted on November 13, 2017 by Christine Lailani

At home, my husband and I made it a habit to take turns in praying before bedtime and before mealtime. This is regardless if we are going through tough times or good times. We intend our future kids to do the same for the following reasons:

1. They learn how to pray regardless of their ages. The little one (early grade schooler) can say a line or a 3-line prayer while for the older one (pre-teens), 5 sentences (so precise, Tin. lol) can be enough. 😉

2. You teach them responsibility and accountability at an early age. This will give them the confidence to take on leadership roles in the future and be accountable for it. They will have to choose what to pray for.

If they ask, “Mom/Dad, I don’t know what to pray for.” You can simply say, “Listen carefully when Dad or Mom prays. You may pray the same things but when you are older, pray from your heart and what your heart is telling you.”

3. They learn to address us, parents, as spiritual leaders of the household. We are the mentors, we guide them, we set the examples. They will copy what they observe, thus, it is best to leave a legacy behind that is worth following/copying.

4. They learn to say grace, to extend grace, and to receive grace from God who provides all – a great opportunity to introduce and build faith in the family.

If you and your family don’t pray together, make it a habit now. Remember, it is also our responsibility as parents to lead them well while they are still young. 🙂

“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” – Proverbs 22:6

The Christian Professional: How Do You Respond?

Posted on October 5, 2017 by Christine Lailani

Photo courtesy: StockSnap

I originally thought about putting the word “react” in the title. But based on what I’ve learned in our bible study group, there’s a difference between “respond” and “react.” In a situation, when you choose to react, emotions come into play first. Whereas with responding, you think and analyze first what is the situation on hand then that’s when you act. The former is usually regarded as negative and the latter as positive.

Too often we neglect responding when driven towards tight and tense situations. I must admit there are times wherein I reacted with anger and we all know what happened next – more consequences came along with it. Yes, reacting ends with regretting.

When I became a Christian, I have learned so much about self-control and discipline. It applies on all – the way I speak, the way I think, the way I act, and even with the way I decide. I cannot say I’ve done it perfectly now but it was a long grueling process of transformation. I am not sure if you’ll believe me when I say that before I got saved I am a cynic. Sarcasm’s my favorite language.

A person from my past once told me, “Tin, you don’t need a knife or any weapon to kill someone. Your words are enough.” At that time, I glorified in it. Yes, it gives me that sense of power when you crush someone’s ego and pride.

But my sarcasm ended there when part of my spiritual transformation involved I, myself, experience how it feels to be on the other end – the recipient of that sarcasm. That’s how I learned that God indeed punishes as part of His disciplinary actions as a Father to make His children better. So I’ve learned how painful it is. Only then did I realize I needed to change it completely.

Changing is hard if you’re doing it alone. You cannot change if you don’t know why you need to change and what is it that needs changing. When I was starting to immerse myself in the Bible back in 2013, I have found everything I needed to help me with the transformation – letting go of the old self and ushering in the new one.

You will find in the bible everything about forgiveness, about unconditional love, patience, understanding, gentleness, about not retaliating and so much more. So I got to say to myself that indeed, these are what it takes to learn them.

I am at this age (31) where I have been in different work settings since I started as a working professional back in 2008. I have seen the different work cultures and the diverse people I have worked with. I have also heard stories upon stories about their ordeal in the workplace and the struggle of having to live with those challenges day by day.

I have observed how crab mentality, favoritism, abuse of authority, wrong accusations, taking the blame for someone else’s mistake, bullying, and persecution are all present in every workplace. The workplace showcases the complexities of the human behavior which we have no control over and why there is a need for Christians to be the “salt and light” and set Christlike examples.

If we are to react in all the situations I have given, these are what will come out – irritability, anger, bitterness, hatred, and retaliation. I am sure you will agree with me there. That’s perfectly understandable – part of our fallen nature as a man is being corrupted with sinfulness such as greed, envy, jealousy, hunger for power, discontentment, rage, and all other sins. These are the same reasons why Adam and Eve were banished from the Garden of Eden.

And yet, those sins are part of what the Cross is for which is also part of our own crosses that we have to carry each day. But because Jesus already paid a price for those sins, we should claim free and uncorrupted lives.

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” – Romans 12:2

So what does God require of us now? Instead of retaliating, leave it all to God. I have long learned that we do not have the power to change people. In the same way that it was only God who helped me change, the same goes for others. Instead, what He instructed us to do is to lord it over to Him all these things and pray for others.

Instead of letting bitterness and anger take the best out of you and make your life miserable, choose to forgive. This way you’ll also learn to empathize with people. You’ll learn to understand why they have so much anger on you, why they are behaving that way or why they’ve done this to you.

Maybe they went through the same thing and their anger made them into the person that they hated. Maybe they are having relational problems at home. Maybe they are depressed. We really don’t know the reason why but only God sees the hearts of each and every one of us. He knows and sees everything so take heart in that too. Do not fear these people even. As God says,

“Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety.” – Proverbs 29:25

Don’t take it personally either. Why? If they haven’t been saved, we all know they are still under the stronghold of the enemy. They don’t know anything yet about the loving grace of God and how great His love is. So maybe that is the reason why God put us there so we could show them that.

Forgive and do not retaliate….answer with gentleness…submit to authority…follow without grumbling…and so on and so forth.

“Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the Word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain.” – Philippians 2: 14-16

I have seen numerous cases wherein when you leave everything to God, God always acts and would do something about it. He is the ultimate judge so to speak and has the ultimate power to do everything. In the same way that I have been disciplined for my wrongdoings, the same goes for those who have wronged others. I do not glorify in it because I also felt how painful it was when God disciplined me. However, I am grateful because I know this will be the start of a new chance for a new life for them too.

For the record, I am grateful to God I am working with a great team. Yes, it is not a perfect team but I appreciate all my supervisors’ work and the effort of the rest of the team members to work cooperatively despite our different backgrounds. I have no assurance it will stay this way forever but as always, it is in my prayers.

But for those who are going through the opposite right now, always believe in your heart God did not put you there for no reason. He has a very good reason why you have to be exactly where you are now. It might be painful but the best way to respond to it is to pray and ask God this:

“Father, what do you want me to learn from this adversity/season/trial?”

Then ask Him to lead you and your ways so you won’t go astray, you won’t be tempted, and you won’t fall to committing any sin and face the consequences.

I will end this article with a bible passage and I hope it will encourage you to fight the good fight of faith may it be in the workplace or anywhere else that He has called you to be.

Lastly, always pray not just for yourself but for the people around you too. ❤

Have the Attitude of Christ

“Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort from his love? Any fellowship together in the Spirit? Are your hearts tender and compassionate?Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one mind and purpose.

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.

You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.

Though he was God,^[a]
    he did not think of equality with God
    as something to cling to.
Instead, he gave up his divine privileges^[b];
    he took the humble position of a slave^[c]
    and was born as a human being.
When he appeared in human form,^[d]
  he humbled himself in obedience to God
    and died a criminal’s death on a cross.

Therefore, God elevated him to the place of highest honor

    and gave him the name above all other names,
that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
    in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue declare that Jesus Christ is Lord,
    to the glory of God the Father.

Shine Brightly for Christ

Dear friends, you always followed my instructions when I was with you. And now that I am away, it is even more important. Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear.For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.

Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people. Hold firmly to the word of life; then, on the day of Christ’s return, I will be proud that I did not run the race in vain and that my work was not useless. But I will rejoice even if I lose my life, pouring it out like a liquid offering to God, just like your faithful service is an offering to God. And I want all of you to share that joy. Yes, you should rejoice, and I will share your joy.”

– Philippians 2:1-18

P.S.

If after seeking for God’s help God has told you to leave a toxic company and all the negativity around it, it is best to take heed. Remember, it is not your boss who gave you your job, he was just used by God as an instrument for you to get that job. Bottomline is that, if God takes away that job from you, most likely He’ll give you another one according to His plans in His right time. 🙂

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

It’s Our 2nd! :-)

Posted on August 15, 2017 by Christine Lailani

Ha! I’m the first one to do the goofy pose this time (for a change). lol 😀

I am squeezing in this article despite my pending tasks for today as part of our 2nd year wedding anniversary celebration. Yes, 2 years down the marriage lane and by God’s grace, I can thankfully say we are getting better, stronger, and deeper with our relationship with God and with one another. (Awww Tin, sniff, sniff.) 😀

Seriously though, I am also sharing two awesome articles which I found over Fb news feed shared by a friend and the other was advertised. One is about grace and the other one is about how to keep your marriage intact. These articles are a huge help to all those who are married and even to those who are single but are planning to enter the married couples department.

Here they are:

In contrast to the article I have written for our first year wedding anniversary, I won’t delve into nitty gritty details about our year as a married couple for 2017. The start of this year has been more like the ‘calm after the storm.’ If you’ve been reading my blog posts since the start of this year, you’ll know why. 🙂

I told hubby dear that I don’t want to celebrate this year’s wedding anniversary with lavish dates and extravagant gifts because first, receiving gifts is not my love language and second, we are saving financially (I can be very kuripot too fyi. lol). The fact that we’re still together after all that we’ve been through is enough gift for me. In fact, it is the best gift that I always thank God for every single day. ❤

Ah yes, to the single sisters and brothers in Christ reading this, you’ll understand when you get married and go through yourself the chapters of the married life. But for the married couples, I know they all agree (including me) to what our pastors in church would always reiterate – “marriage is hard work.”

I told hubby that our first year wedding anniversary deserves that much of an emphasis because it’s the most crucial year for any newlyweds. It’s that year when you’re starting to get to know each other in an extremely deeper level like what ticks him off when he’s at home, what are my routines, etc., and adjusting to living together under one roof.

For the first few months after our first year wedding anniversary, we’re still experiencing ripples of that adjustment period and honestly, even now, we are still adjusting to one another. My Mom actually advised me that it indeed takes a lifetime to know your spouse. She added that she and my Dad (both in their 70s now) are still making those adjustments even after 44 years of being married.

But don’t interpret this in a way that the married life is far too burdensome. Although I might have to add that at some point in your married life you would feel that way, I assure you that for the greater part, it is an awesome journey holistically. It will nourish every aspect of your life and every aspect of who you are.

Personally, being married made us grow deeper in our walk with God. I must admit that our faith was extremely challenged to the point wherein we felt like we’re too exhausted to fight it out, and yet, by the grace of God, you will “indeed soar with wings like an eagle” and fly like never before.

To put it in another way, this article has no meaning if I won’t say that it was all God who made our marriage the way it is now. Our own efforts are useless – if and only if they are the only things that we hold on to every time challenges of all sort come our way. It was all about God, all about our prayers every single night, all about finding ways to attend and listen to the Sunday preaching, all about hearing out from spiritual mentors, and all about our trust in Him every single day, in every decision, in every thought, in every action, just literally everything.

Everything is about God and that is the bottom line of it all. Remove God in the husband and wife equation and it sure will fail. No amount of human effort can save a failing marriage except by the loving grace of God.

Believe me, I have been through very tough circumstances but I never gave up on my husband because I know God will never give up on us for as long as we keep the commitment – our marriage vows. I know that my husband is not perfect and neither am I that’s why it is a given that we will both fail each other through the entire course of our marriage. But it is not in ourselves that we rely on for hope, instead, we put it in God.

Well honestly, I can’t help but cry a tear or two (yes, I counted them. lol) while typing this and I looked back at every single moment that my husband and I went through. Through the good and the bad times, God was always there. I felt Him, I heard Him but it took me my COMPLETE trust in Him as well.

There were moments wherein imagining now, I know my husband and I wouldn’t be able to make it through, and you may indeed call it as the worst of the worst. But I held on to my faith. I trusted blindly to the point that I just surrendered everything to God.

Yes, our human frailties will require we REALLY let go of some things. Instead, let God take over, let God fix what needs to be fixed, ask God to give you wisdom, clarity, and instructions – HE WILL NEVER FAIL YOU.

If I cry now while I type this, that’s because I am overwhelmed by the fact that all three of us made it all through – God, Brian, and me. If you are reading this and you’re going through the toughest times in your marriage, I encourage you to NEVER GIVE UP. Never give up on your spouse and most definitely, never give up on God. HOLD ON TO HIS BEAUTIFUL PROMISES.

Pray that God will soften hearts; pray that God will heal gaping wounds; pray for restoration; pray for reconciliation; pray for forgiveness; pray for a change in you and a change in your spouse; and most of all, LISTEN TO WHAT GOD HAS TO SAY.

Never let your emotions drown the voice of God. Calm yourself and calm your spirit by immersing in the BIBLE day and night. Your bible will be your guide, it will be your weapon when the enemy starts to fill in your thoughts and your heart with lies.

What are these lies? Let me just share a couple of them and they are the usual thoughts:

your husband/wife doesn’t love you anymore
you are not worthy of love
you will not change
your spouse will not change
there is no hope for both of us
the damage has already been done
the damage is far too great
he/she will be happy with someone else
he/she is not the right one for me
I am a failure

Counterattack these lies with these TRUTHS instead:

my husband/wife will always love me no matter what
I am worthy of the greatest love Jesus died for me on the Cross
I will change by God’s grace in God’s time according to His plans
my spouse will change by God’s grace in God’s time according to His plans
there is ALWAYS HOPE IN CHRIST JESUS OUR SAVIOR
we all make mistakes BUT we are also given CHANCES
NOTHING is too damaged or too broken for God to heal and restore
I can make my spouse happy
my spouse is God’s best for me (claim it in Jesus’ Name)
I am a work in progress and God will see to it that “whatever work He’s started in me will be brought to completion in His perfect time”

Lastly, claim God’s beautiful promises for you and your spouse and fight for your marriage. Look at the bigger picture and don’t be too absorbed by the small things or the stumbling blocks in front of you.

Instead, THANK GOD EVERY DAY IN EVERY WAY.

And always look at your end goal as a married couple by keeping these vows you made in front of God latched in your heart safe and secure:

“Through thick and thin, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part…” ❤

P.S.

I’d like to thank my spouse for keeping the faith, for not giving up, for redirecting me to God during the times that I felt so weak, for praying with me always, for the many chances to change, and last but not the least, for loving me beyond my imperfections. ❤

Oh and also, for being so patient with me like in the photo above during one of our photo stints last Sunday for a project. 😀

I love God and I love my husband. Nope, it’s an understatement – I LOVE BOTH OF THEM SO MUCH – God first, my husband next. 🙂

To cap off this cheesiness, do watch this awesome cover of “Say You Won’t Let Go” by Moira dela Torre. 😉

If You Do Not Have Love

Posted on August 14, 2017 by Christine Lailani

heartlove

This is a morning thought that’s been itching to get out and I just need to write it fast before I get on with today’s tasks and busy schedule. Yes, my priority is God first. So this first before anything else. 🙂

However, I do not have the extra time (maybe later) to look up the exact biblical references (bible verses) for some of my quoted statements. You know I am never good in memorizing numbers but I can memorize a thought. But you can go the extra mile by typing them over Google search, it might show you other verses too that the Holy Spirit may be speaking to you in whatever season you’re in.

So what’s this morning thought I was saying? It’s this – as believers, may we not fall into the sin of having the superiority complex and the exclusivity of Christians mingling with fellow Christians or on-the-road-to-being-a-Christian alone. Remember that “we ALL have fallen short of the glory of God” and salvation is not reserved for the privileged few but it’s FREE FOR ALL.

That’s regardless if someone used to be/or currently a drug addict, a rapist, a robber, a criminal, an adulterer, an abortionist, etc., CHRISTIAN OR NOT. We are all brothers and sisters in Christ because we have ONE FATHER, ONE CREATOR.

Even pastors and ministers sin by saying the wrong word, by making the wrong decision, by being tempted with anger, etc. for they are as human as we all are and to sin is part of our fallen nature. Yet when we were given a new life when we got saved, we commit to a life of righteousness.

That is why the greatest way to show our love back to the Father who gave us this opportunity to a new life is to extend the GRACE that He has given us even if we all DO NOT DESERVE IT. We are all a work in progress in our spiritual journey, it is best to develop a character that ENCOURAGES, that gives HOPE, rather than a character that condemns and criticizes.

The core of Christianity was never just about faith nor discipleship but most importantly, about LOVE. The greatest commandment is this, “Love one another as I have loved you.”

Jesus came here not to condemn this world but to give HOPE out of His Father’s LOVE FOR US. That is why even “if we speak in tongues,…but DO NOT HAVE LOVE, we are only a resounding gong. And for anyone who doesn’t know how to love doesn’t have the love of the Father in them.”

And lastly, “faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is LOVE.”

What do you know about love? Read 1 Corinthians 13. I got to know all about it and apply what I learned from the bible when I got married.

Yes, my seasons changed and it was a total paradigm shift from knowing the theories alone (when I was single) to applying them for real (when I got married). And yet I am more than glad to God for giving me this opportunity. 🙂

My challenge is this:

If you can overlook an offense no matter how grave it is even to the point of life and death, then you know how it is to love. You know without a doubt the Father’s love for you and me. It was when Jesus died for our sins – the greatest sacrifice and form of love ever done.

For one, try to reach out and LOVE that person under the stronghold of drugs and massacred an innocent family. Pray for a new life to begin with God at the center of his life, then maybe that love you have given will radiate in him and him to others until it becomes a domino effect.

How do you change the world? Be that change by starting with one person at a time. That is our responsibility, leave the government to carry on with its own and other affairs.

Again, do you have the love of the Father in you? If yes, then we should love others as to how He loved us. Start it with someone you know whom you thought is impossible to love. You might be startled by the fact that it did not only change that person but it also changed you.

Indeed, “be the change you wish to see in the world.” 🙂

P.S.

This is the intro for my next article – the 2nd year wedding anniversary special. Pretty long, eh? 😀

Resting in His Saving and Amazing Grace

Posted on May 19, 2017 by Christine Lailani

“Do one thing: Live the life you always wanted to live. Avoid criticizing others and concentrate on fulfilling your dreams. This may not seem very important to you, but God, who sees all, knows that the example you give is helping Him to improve the world. And each day, He will bestow more blessings upon it.”

– Manuscript of Accra, Paulo Coehlo

I can see the cursor blinking in and out like an ellipsis….

So many words and yet so many ways to tell, undecided…

….how do I begin? 🙂

Yes, how do I begin testifying to a series of events that piled up already and yet I couldn’t find the “tugging” to post them until just now? *wink* Honestly, I still don’t have the slightest idea how to arrange the thoughts which have been sitting as a draft since February here in WordPress and share them. Yet I can only trust the Spirit’s leading on how the wordplay will come about in this post.

The posts in this blog for the past 2-3 years have been about nothing else but faith. This was how God intended it to be. Though for the first year of this blog I was grappling on what to write about, now, it is the other way around – I am battling with time for the numerous pending posts that I needed to write and post.

For March, it’ll summarize what went on from February until March. My January post summarized what transpired in the months of December and January. The month of March was about marching forward and yes, the character trait for March is CLARITY. As for February, it was AFFECTION (do read January post for this one.) 🙂

February: AFFECTION

March: CLARITY

This might explain why I was missing in the blogosphere for the month of February and why this post is super long (sorry about that, friends). February was the month of settling things – again, not a coincidence, but I have learned to rely on God’s plans all along even though some are hard to accept, some are hard to understand, and some are impossible to achieve. But then, that is one tough responsibility of a Christian and that is everyone’s calling too – live by faith and not by sight.

Last December, everything was unraveled. It was a moment of choosing among a multitude of choices and tough decisions. Every flaw, every need and every concern were brought out in the open. I have thought for that moment it might seem such an endless feat of emotional roller coaster and yet God had been faithful enough.

Fast forward to January, the start of 2017 was also the start of the turnaround of events. When seasons change and the comfort zone is no longer part of the next plans, it could be daunting. But as it was written, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:7

February was a month jam-packed of events. When you are caught in a whirlwind of events, oftentimes a “soul check” may come as the least of your priorities. But in faith, it is the other way around – a “soul check” is necessary and should be the top priority before everything else. That was what happened in the last few months, a question of am I doing it God’s way or not. I’ll just mention a few and most of them actually were answered prayers – prayers that I never thought I have prayed and yet silently in my heart, I did. Only God sees our hearts, anyway.

Maybe that is the reason why fulfillment in those answered prayers never really came from receiving the actual answer to the prayer per se but more about how God listens and how great He is to provide even the most impossible. It was all about God in the end, never about our desires but a satisfied desire on both our end and God’s that thru this fulfillment, we have established a kindred spirit and a deeper and personal relationship with our Creator. It is all a matter of communicating between Him and you alone – the ONLY thing that He asks from us.

So let’s begin the long journey of disclosing in this online journal what traversed in my moment of hibernation in the blogosphere starting February.

The incident:

A convo between my husband and I took place wherein I asked him what is it that he wants best in this life. His answer made me smile and speechless at the same time making me wonder where he could possibly be generating all these answers. My best guess – the heart. Who really am I to judge, indeed? I don’t see the heart, God does. 😉

“I don’t want material things but eternal rest.”

We came to that point wherein we had that (serious) husband and wife contemplation about priorities, the future and life in general. I can say that throughout the moments since I got saved, I did not regret any decision I have made which included my decision to marry. It is only through the entire duration of our years together as a married couple did I get to see why God gave me my husband in particular – I had so many answered prayers through my husband. It is either an answered prayer to that change I have been rooting to do internally but don’t have the guts to discipline myself or the big and small things that I have been wanting in my heart but never expressed them openly.

But God, once again, proved Himself faithful all throughout.

I have always wondered what if I married another man. Will he be patient, understanding and forgiving enough as my husband is right now to me and my circumstances? I oftentimes ask my husband how he feels regarding our situation and ask him to be patient with me as well and what I am going through. His answer was always a gentle, “I understand.” Though he would always say that, I know that he is sacrificing so much for both of us and as his partner, I have felt this inadequacy when it comes to fulfilling my role and my duties as a wife.

Starting the month of January until now, this was personally, for me, a season of instability. Firstly, every married couple gets to deal with financial difficulties and this season, my husband and I are going through with our own fair share. We have decided to finally move out from the apartment that my sisters and I have been living in for the past 20 years though it was only me who lived in the place for the last 7 years. We have decided to relocate near his workplace as it is more convenient for him and he gets to rest right away after work.

But this posed as a problem since I have no work when we both decided to move out and we are relying on my husband’s income alone for our daily expenses. If you’ll do the numbers from bills to necessities plus all the home stuff that we have to buy, the total suggested more funds. I did get a job. It was a convenient one but, unfortunately, it was not from my field of expertise and ironically, my water loo too – finance. Yes, it has something to do with numbers and money.

If you are wondering how I ended up in that job, I don’t know too. 😀 But I know God has a reason why because I got that job just 3 days after we moved in our new apartment. We were able to buy some of the basic stuff that we need at home. But as you all know it, I had to let the job go. I will not be able to give my best if it is something that I am not familiar with or is not my cup of tea. Numbers make me cringe and the fear of committing a mistake when it comes to computing plus the fact that it deals with money just proved that I might regret it later if I stayed longer. Another thing too, the worry of it all just took the better part of me and stress replaced what used to be a hopeful and positive attitude – I first thought I should give it a try. Employment equates to stress but when I started having stomach problems, difficulty sleeping at night and puking for no reason at all, I know I have to make a decision.

I wanted to go back to teaching. It was actually the very reason I stated when I resigned. The calling of being a teacher is greater. But then again, we all know that a teaching job is even more challenging when it comes to classroom management, multitasking, time management, etc. Again, no employment is ever easy and stress-free. But then again, I did want to try it out. Here came the opportunity – I had everything carefully and perfectly planned out so I’d get the job. But here came unprecedented circumstances which for the first few, I was able to gain control over but it required my husband and me to stay up until past midnight. I was able to pull it off. The next day I woke up with my estimated schedule. Everything should be smooth sailing until news came that the MRT 3 broke down and became operational only at 8am. I didn’t give up. If commuting was not an option then I’d go for the GRAB car – I was wrong. Since majority of the stranded commuters chose other alternatives of commuting, traffic was inevitable and it was worse than the usual. I decided by then that I had to let the opportunity go because it only means that it wasn’t intended for me. If I still pursued it then most likely I’ll be going against the grain of fate and will meet more unfortunate events along the way.

I am well aware of the idea to keep on swimming ahead even if the vision before you is hazy or the waters seem to be too deep and troubled or the shore is nowhere to be seen, figuratively speaking. But I am also well aware that from what I have experienced so far, if everything seems to be failing even if you have tried all possible attempts in getting things right, it only means it is beyond your control and God has intended a different plan for you. It could be God’s way of preventing you from any future loss/failure, future pain, even more hassle and inconvenience than intended.

So I asked God why I can’t have a regular office job. That moment of quietude with Him and me asking all these sort of questions trying to make sense of what has happened and what is happening came to a final halt – a matter of life and death.

I have already mentioned this a couple of times in my previous blog posts and health wise, I know I have nothing to fear. In the recent medical checkup I came clear but if I am not cautious enough i.e. check my lifestyle, sleeping patterns, food intake, physical activity, etc., and all these accumulated through the years could mean my ending up in a hospital bed earlier than expected.

I have to be cautious with everything.

I am not claiming it but I know it as a fact that I am a carrier of cancer genes. It was a generational curse – it didn’t skip a generation starting from my great grandmother (we don’t know if it started even way before her generation) to my grandmother then to my Mom. They were all breast cancer survivors. Most likely you’ll tell me I will survive too. 🙂

Yes, by faith and by God’s saving grace I know I will. But then it should not be reason enough for me to be complacent. My great grandmother, grandmother and Mom spent most of their lives in the province – a laid back lifestyle, pure simplicity, a fresh and clean environment and less complicated than city life. I spent half of my life in the metro starting college which was the opposite.

Again. I have to be more cautious.

If you will notice, I referred to breast cancer in the past tense because I am declaring that starting from my generation, not one among my 3 sisters and I will have breast cancer how many years from now and that the future generations of our family will be free of this generational curse.

There’s another generational curse too that I am declaring for my family and relatives and the future generations in our blood line to be free from starting with our generation but due to its sensitivity, I chose to keep it confidential.

These generational curses have no cure – ONLY God can deliver us from these curses. Not even the fields of medicine and science have the capacity to provide a lasting treatment/solution.

But,

“We can face the reality of our own mortality because we trust in God.” – Our Daily Bread

“Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” – Psalm 90:12

Another thing too, my husband and I have been trying to have a child but time declared we can’t have one as of yet. We did talk about it and he told me that whatever God’s will is, he is happy and content either way.

That, I absolutely and unquestioningly agree upon. I did tell him though that as much as I’d want to have a child, I wouldn’t want to raise a child and let him suffer in this world or be punished for the mistakes that his parents did or bear the generational curse passed on to him. If part of the sacrifice that we have to make in order to break the generational curse is to be childless, then we have to honor it.

But then again, it entirely depends on what God’s will is and what His plans are. Indeed,

“As you do not know the way the Spirit comes to the bones in the womb of a woman with child, so you do not know the work of God who makes everything.” – Ecclesiastes 11:5

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:9

The generational curses and the current situation my husband and I are going through both have one thing in common – stress as the triggering factor.

Looking back to what I had to give up, they were standards that this world dictated as what should be accomplished and yet it all equated to stress. When I gave up my graduate study, I asked myself if it is worth it especially when my eczema attacks started showing up again, I had to deal with black spots in my legs which lasted for how many months and I experienced tension headaches/migraines which lasted for 3 days twice a month. I also had to give up the liberty and privilege of working in the corporate world or in my field of expertise.

Do I have regrets? Certainly not. My decision to not conform to the terms of this world won’t rob me of my dignity and make me less of a woman, will it? My identity no longer is attached to those titles that this world offer but to the title that God has given me – His princess and His loving daughter.

“Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

My situation now? God showed me other alternatives. I know God did not give me skills just to see them all go to waste until I die and not be able to contribute to this world and help humanity in any way – it’ll make Him unhappy. 😀 I told my husband he need not worry because there are a lot of home-based jobs available for me in the fields of teaching and writing, my two best fortes, if I really need to get a professional job as a means to get an income. There are so many of them actually in different fields of expertise and if I will be “takaw tingin,” I’d prefer having at least 2 since their schedules are usually flexible. BUT, God will definitely say “No.” 😀

In addition, I have witnessed a lot of female friends who shifted from being corporate employees to staying at home, being a full-time Mom and housewife with a home-based job, stressed also but FULFILLED receiving the same salary that she gets if she works in the office spending energy and time commuting, coming home extremely exhausted and has no time for her family.

Yes, fulfillment makes all the difference, right? Even if you are paid triple of what a regular wage earner gets if the fulfillment isn’t there, work will just be equated to work per se in all technical aspect of the term. Aside from that, “whatever it is that our hearts value, there our treasure will be also.” The bad thing about this is if we’re putting our hope on treasures that are temporary and will eventually fade away. Building relationships with people I love are important to me – quality time is my love language. I want to invest more in it – being with my family.

What else?

As of the late, my husband asked me if I could do commissioned work for my sketching hobby after I posted the sketch (next blog article) I did of him during his birthday last May 4. He told me that one of his Mom’s friends asked if I could do their family portrait and his Mom and brother also requested the same along with a few of my relatives and friends ever since I posted some of my previous sketches. My answer was an unsure “let’s see.” 😀

If God gives us a talent as a gift, He has a very good purpose behind it all and honestly, I am not yet confident enough to take my sketching hobby to a higher level. 😀 It’s been 15 years since I started this hobby out of my need to have an outlet when things and times get rough. I am not confident as well to tag a price in each of my art work. I intended to give them for free actually and make the recipient of the art work happy – my ultimate goal as an artist. But if God instructs I have them paid, then I believe I should. Now this, I need to really pray hard as I don’t want to disappoint those who have requested to have their sketches done and there are a lot of them pending requests already. I just need more time to pray to God about it and wait for His answers. *insert wide smile here*

Another opportunity also came about my putting up a restaurant/café after hubby and I made this special burger recipe and his brother insisted we make it as a business as he knows someone who can be our supplier. I told him we talked about this option but we have chosen my hometown in Bicol as our business location – yup, you guessed that right, too far. My 3^rd sister and I have actually planned about this already and came up with the concept for the café and went through the basics of business analytics and management and the only thing she said was that it won’t materialize if I am not there with her to get things started and to keep them running. One of my hobbies is cooking and experimenting with different recipes but eating the food I cooked is not part of them. lol I believe I am to blame if hubby gained a lot of weight after we got married. Ooops, not my real intention there though. 😀 I just want to cook for other people and it makes me happy when they are happy with the dishes I serve them. Again, this is another prayer for my prayer line when it comes to wisdom, guidance and instruction.

Honestly, I was never after the money nor the recognition – getting compensated for the things I love to do and the things that God has gifted me with in terms of talents and skills. I’d like to contribute and share them to society and be able to make every individual happy and fulfilled or if what I contributed could help them in any other way regardless if I’d get anything in return or not (awards, recognition, money, etc.). I only needed money for survival and for now, that is what my hubby and I needed – for our daily needs but never to satisfy our wants and live in excess.

Moreover, I told my husband that if time comes God blessed us with more than we needed, I will retain the kind of lifestyle I have now and would still prefer the same living conditions – not a lavish nor grand lifestyle but a simple, minimalist one. Again, by having only the things that I need and never the things that I want.

Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” – Mark 10:21

But as we all know it, I can plan so many things, have so many choices and wonderful opportunities to choose from and small and big decisions to make and yet, “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.” – Proverbs 19:21

Thus, I rest my case. 😀

For all the generational curses, the lifestyle check, the shift in opportunities, the continued pursuit of God’s will in my life – they were not because I live in fear but because I have fear in the Lord and if obedience is what He requires of me in this season so He can usher me towards what He desires for my life, then I should, by all means comply, stop figuring out this life on my own and rest in His saving grace.

Solution? Pray harder and trust God and His plans even harder.

[In prayer we call on God “who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine.”] – Ephesians 3:20

Oh and I think I forgot to mention that in my Paulo Coehlo planner-turned-spiritual journal, April’s character trait is COOPERATION and May is FAITH.

April: COOPERATION

May: FAITH

Did God say, “Tin, you must cooperate with me and have faith?” I think He just did that’s why I wrote this. *insert wide smile here again* 😀

“Since we have these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from every defilement of body and spirit, bringing holiness to completion in the fear of God.” – 2 Corinthians 7:1

P.S.

For the first quarter of year 2017, my life/planner went from having TOLERANCE (January), giving AFFECTION (February), to achieving CLARITY (March), giving COOPERATION (April) and last but not the least, having FAITH (May). 🙂

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

“Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm for God can be trusted to keep His promises.” – Hebrews 10:23

“God can be trusted to guide us.” – Our Daily Bread

“…the challenge is to trust (in) God’s ability to lead rather than in our ability to follow.” – Genesis 12:1

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” – Romans 8:28

Year 2017: Everything Made New

Posted on January 31, 2017 by Christine Lailani

Vindicated is the world’s term for it, redeemed is how faith coins it.

This article was sitting as a draft since November. But I only had the urge to finish writing it today because a lot more happened after November. So for the month of December I didn’t publish any article – a moment of solitude and immersion in faith. 🙂

There’s social unrest in the decision of current president of the Philippines, President Duterte, and the supreme court to allow the remains of a dictator and former President of the Philippines Ferdinand Marcos to be buried in the Libingan ng mga Bayani or be given a hero’s burial. It was an unfair decision to most considering all the human rights violation committed, plunder and social injustice in all forms when the country was placed under martial law during the Marcos regime.

It doesn’t seem such a reasonable, sensitive and acceptable answer by comforting the victims of martial law and their families by the statement “forgive and move on.” If you are to ask my side, I chose to settle it with God instead – not my terms but His.

I went thru a similar situation myself about two months ago, so please bear with me if this part will be a bit sensitive and emotional. It was just one of those heated disagreements between me and hubby. Through this challenging situation, it was heartbreaking to hear your spouse renounce his faith and even curse God which made me speak against my faith too. Yes, it was a very sad moment between us which turned into something worse that our families needed to meddle to stop the damage from getting bigger. Hubby and I decided we live separately for the meantime for our own safety and for the sake of saving our marriage.

When I went to the province, I was given the wrong ticket for the first time in my entire 15 years of traveling back and forth going home. Can you guess what was the wrong ticket amount? It’s 888. 😀 Yes, I interpreted it as an assurance that the Lord, our God, is indeed with us we need not worry.

How ironic it is though that my husband’s surname is Rome. Jesus’ number one persecutor is none other than the Romans. 🙂 They tried to gain control over Jesus but in the end they were the ones defeated when He overcame death. Jesus symbolizes the church, if not, He is the church. In a marriage, the wife is the church.

This clearly illustrates how man tried to separate from God/church/wife because of the sins and that only Jesus can bridge this gap so the relationship between man and God will be restored. This is just like when Israel rebelled against God and how God tried to make them turn to Him.

What happened was this, God made my relationship something to learn from and yet just like the martial law victims whose rights were violated, God will be the only one with the authority and the power to judge anyone.

They say that when you are deeply hurting, God is creating something wonderful in you and He is veering you away from possible destruction. Yet, it always starts with humility and forgiveness. Just like in this quote from my Our Daily Bread daily devotion, “To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you. – C.S. Lewis”

For the two months that we have been apart, I persevered in assuring my husband that tho I have agreed we live separately for the time being, it doesn’t mean I am giving up on him and our marriage. It is indeed true that for all that we have been through, not once did I give up on our relationship and our marriage and I never will. The first thing that came to my mind during this season was the “love dare” from one of the greatest Christian films I have watched about marriages which is Fireproof.

Just like in the movie, I too am extremely grateful right now that God gave me a family whom I deeply appreciate being mentors in this ordeal who lead me to God and towards the right path. It was difficult to hear and choose from a lot of different prespectives but they did help a lot in widening my mindset about a lot of things through the Spirit’s guidance.

It wasn’t God’s goal that He’ll give you the perfect spouse because your husband/wife will fail you in the entire course of your marriage. This is not because God wants to see us suffer but He wanted to see how we will honor our commitment to Him and to our spouse, how will we continue fighting for our faith towards the beautiful promises that He has and last but not the least, to love unconditionally in the same way that He has loved us. We were born sinners, we are imperfect and we have been saved only by GRACE – something that we did not deserve but was given as a gift out of His great love for us.

I remembered a few years back when a male colleague actually confronted me with a startling confession, “Tin, no guy will ever be a match for you. You are talented, beautiful, almost everything.” I couldn’t give him a fair answer except that I wasn’t created by God to be someone’s or anybody’s rival. I was made as a man’s partner, as equal and as unique as everyone else. I, as a woman, do not have high standards or maybe I do but it doesn’t matter because what matters is that we have a God who has REALLY high standards and these are the standards that we ought to meet – not mine, not yours, but His.

So for two months I can say a lot have happened. But for the general feel of those two months, I can describe it as very painful and yet it was life-changing. As expected, I got a new Paulo Coehlo planner during the start of the year. This is my brother and sister-in-law’s consistent Christmas gift for me which, I must say, I appreciate a lot as my spiritual journey won’t be complete without it. This planner and I shared a lot of memories and it records all of my prayers, requests, letters of gratitude, revelations and daily bible verses from YouVersion and Our Daily Bread apps.

We also have a prayer and fasting in church at the start of the year and I must say too it was during this time that I had the greatest revelation from yes, the book of Revelation itself. 🙂

At first I did find it funny. I mean, even before, God’s ways are always amazing. He is so full of surprises. Most often these surprises will make you cry in awe – I always do. But it also made me humble – humble enough to acknowledge how could I have questioned God’s plans. It’s as if I am hearing Jesus when He said to His disciples, “you who have such little faith.” Well, when prayer time comes and I do get to talk with God, I feel all too guilty of this. However, His love and grace remain steadfast and true – it sets you free and it gives you a new chance in life always.

I shared this testimony exactly after the prayer and fasting ended. When I went home to my province last December, no one was left to tend my little garden. I just have faith that God will take good care of them for me in the same way He takes care of the wild forests. When I came back in January, true enough, my plants were flourishing except for one – the oldest plant I have since 2005 which is a calamansi plant. It doesn’t bear any fruit probably because there’s no other calamansi plant around that can pollinate it.

All the leaves of my calamansi plant were curled and dried up. My sister was the one who noticed it first and asked me what happened. We both could not explain as the rest of my plants were thriving. So she said maybe a fungus attacked the roots and I thought that it could very well be the reason. She suggested I throw the plant away. I thought it best too as it’ll be absurd keeping a dead plant in your garden. 😀

But on second thoughts, I have decided to keep it. I did water it for a day or two after we got back but when I saw that the leaves are really all dried up and they were starting to fall off one by one, I stopped watering it for about 2 weeks except for the occasional rainshowers but still chose to keep it. I just don’t know why I still kept it. 🙂

Anyway, for the month of November the character trait in my planner was patience, December was determination and January 2017 is tolerance. Nope, it is not an irony these traits are exactly what I needed to learn in the season I was in but I believe they’re all part of His plans. I have remained hopeful and faithful for the time when my husband will be saved and for the time when we will be together again. Ah yes, those grueling two months of being apart and you felt that your life was in shambles and what you have with you is nothing else but faith.

I asked God for forgiveness, that He would change me and yet I asked Him for strength and courage too. I know God is changing my hubby too. It is always between God and the person and that the people around are used only as vessels for God to allow that change to take place. I was claiming that the year 2017 will be the start of a lot of positive changes for all even if we seem to have lost everything. I am believing too that more unbelieving spouses will rise in the calling that God has for them to be Godly husbands and wives and Godly parents to their children. I am praying that the generations to come will learn from the generational curses that have been set and passed on to them by their ancestors and they will break free from them through the Cross.

As much as I’d want to share every single detail of those two months that I can say God was purifying me thus made me choose a white dress for Christmas day (see photo below), I would like to share the following bible verses, quotations in my daily devotion, articles I came across and questions I have asked God wherein I have felt much of the Spirit’s presence in what I was and am going through until now. I hope you will be blessed by them too in whatever season you are in. These verses came one by one consistently everyday. 🙂

P.S.

Don’t forget to read the last part – I have good news to tell. 😉

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding..” – Proverbs 3:5

“For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:9

“Give your burdens to the LORD, and He will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” – Psalm 55:2

“Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.” – John 15:4

“We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting Him, He endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now He is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.” – Hebrews 12:2

Lord, teach me how to carry my own cross and how to carry it well.

“This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands. For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do.”- 1 Peter 3:3‭-‬6

“God is at work to make us who He intends us to be.” – Our Daily Bread

“Hear the word of the Lord.” – Jeremiah 7: 2

“I am making everything new.” – Revelation 21:5

“The word of the Lord never fails.” – Luke 1:3

“But seek first the Kingdom of God and live righteously and He will give you everything you need.” – Matthew 6:33

“Only Jesus can give us new life.” (John 14:19)

“Christ will never leave His wife. Ever. There may be times of painful distance and tragic backsliding on our part. But Christ keeps His covenant forever. Marriage is a display of that! That is the most ultimate thing we can say about it.”

– http://www.desiringgod.org/messages/staying-married-is-not-about-staying-in-love-part-1

A display of His greatness.

I often wonder if my life was patterned after every devotion I am using – every bible verse, every Godly wisdom shared, I felt applying them all for real for they were all timely in every event that I am going through.

“So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time He will lift you up in honor.” – 1 Peter 5:6

Why choose me, Lord?

Who am I to question God and His ways?

“Let others see your testimony as well as hear it.” – Our Daily Bread (2 Corinthians 4:7)

For I prefer Lord for my faith to be tested like iron is being forged in fire. For I do not intend to be lukewarm in my faith.

“There is no risk in abandoning ourselves to God.” (Romans 12:1)

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you. – C.S. Lewis” (Romans 7:14)

“But the Lord is faithful; He will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one.” – 2 Thessalonians 3:3

“Christ holds all things together.” (Colossians 1:17)

Now we’re on to the last part of this article which I was referring to previously. So what’s the good news? Well, God’s grace made it possible for our marriage to be restored and we are on to an absolutely new chapter of our lives as a married couple. A new chapter indeed because we are finally deciding to relocate to a place near his work, I am going back to the work force and I just felt real change within me and my spouse. At first I was apprehensive about this change but if God brought us here, then He will help us go through it all as well.

As my husband put it (yes, my husband. 😀 ), God is good. 🙂

Oh and yes, remember the plant that died which I still kept? After 2 weeks, this is how it looks now – new leaves. It’s alive! “The old is gone and the new has come and I am making everything new” indeed as what the Lord says. All it took was FAITH. 😀

To end this article, I’ll share this bible verse which was from my laptop’s screensaver yesterday (it displays a different bible verse everyday). Yet another revelation from the book of Revelation:

“Because you have obeyed my command to persevere, I will protect you from the great time of testing that will come upon the whole world to test those who belong to this world.” – Revelation 3:10

Oh how I love my God. ❤ *insert wide smile here*

Continue fighting the good fight of faith my dear brothers and sisters. 🙂

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