Always On Fire

Posted on July 6, 2024 by Christine Lailani

The last day of this year’s Mid-Year Prayer and Fasting ended with such high energy – it’s dedicated to campus ministry. So expected na that the youth will still be full of energy kahit nagfa-fasting. Ang mga tanders gusto nang umuwi. 😅

Ah yes, watching the youth jump and sing their hearts out and with so much fervor during praise and worship brings back memories of mine na sobrang naka-relate ako. Kahit tahimik at mahiyain ako noon (kahit ngayon), kapag ang mga kasama mo mag-worship ay ganyan ka-energetic, mahahawa ka din talaga.

But they were among the best memories of my spiritual journey as a born-again Christian. Naalala ko dati, after ng church service, parang andami mo pang energy at kulang na lang hindi ka na uuwi at sa church ka na lang lagi.

I started my baby steps as a born-again Christian sa Victory Katipunan at ang dating Victory GT Toyota in UP Diliman. Karamihan sa churchgoers doon ay mga estudyante. I was a young professional back then pero ito lang ang mga malapit na Victory churches sa apartment namin dati kaya dito ako nagsimba. I had my 1-on-1 discipleship journey and Victory Weekend in Victory Katipunan in 2013.

Kaya kapag pakiramdam mo nanlalamig ka na sa faith, just attend a Youth Service (every Friday night ito usually). Because to be honest, we can learn a lot from the youth. They bring in new perspectives, which allow us to better understand their culture now and could be the solution to bridging the generational gap as far as discipleship is concerned.

And they have LOTS of energy. Kailangan i-channel ito para sa iba’t ibang talents like singing and dancing pero within the church community. Ganito rin kami sa Protestant church namin sa hometown ko where I attended church services when I was a kid. Merong intermission number ang youth sa kalagitnaan ng church service.

If I’m going to be a parent, I’d rather see my child being rambunctious and on fire serving the Lord through praise and worship than attending some concerts where drunkenness, illegal drugs, sex, etc. are prevalent at ang mga lyrics ng kanta either sobrang depressing or maraming mura. Kaya ang Spotify ko ngayon sinasala ko what are the songs that I should and should not include in my playlists. May iba na medyo sablay ng konti sa lyrics, but because I love the melody, pinapakinggan ko sya. But I don’t let the words get into my head.

Speaking of being on fire, I’ve been pondering on these two questions recently. Like what if someone asks me these questions, ano ba ang isasagot ko? 🙂

“Have you always been this on fire for the Lord?“

“Are you always this passionate with this Jesus thing?“

My answer sa mga tanong na ito is that, yes, I have always been on fire for the Lord. May mga times na hindi ako madalas makasimba, but my faith never became lukewarm. Lagi kasing may tugging ng Spirit to remain true sa calling at isa na dyan itong blog ko. Na kailangan ipagpatuloy ang pag-share ng Word and spiritual journey ko dito to fulfill the commitment I made when I surrendered my life to Him. Ganyan si God pagdating sa accountability, hindi mo Sya pwedeng talikuran ng ganun-ganun lang. 😃

Gaya noong isang araw, 2nd day ng prayer and fasting, I woke up with another eczema breakout – just one, right in the middle of my left hand. This one rash reappears on the same spot every time something triggers it i.e. perfumes, stress, food allergens, cold and dry environments, etc.

Noong una itong lumabas last year kung tama pagkaalala ko, na-bother ako kung ano na naman naka-trigger sa kanya. Hanggang sa nasanay na ako tignan sya every time it reappears. I’ve had eczema flare-ups since I was in college, btw. At napatawa na lang ako when I saw it again kahapon.

Because you know what it reminded me of? Para syang ‘yung scar ni Jesus sa kamay noong pinako Sya sa Cross. I mean, sa dinami-daming locations sa katawan na pwede syang lumabas, dito lang talaga sa left hand at saktong sentrong-sentro pa at nag-iisa lang sya.

At ngayon lang sa akin nag-sink in na hindi kaya God is trying to remind me something? And He had to use a visual reminder, something tangible na hindi ko basta-basta madi-dismiss. Because I am in this season yet again na God is telling me to do something that will require me to step out in even bigger faith. At ang sagot ko sa Kanya was this:

“Lord, I am unworthy. I am not equipped. I am not qualified. I don’t want to do it.”

I know God is reminding me of my worth again – in Him. Para bang itong pantal ay reminder ng Dios na, “Tin, my Son sacrificed His life for you and died on the Cross to save you from being perished. Because that is how much I love you and that is how special you are to me. I want you to continue walking the path that I have set out for you to walk on and complete the task that I want you to do. His blood was shed on your behalf so you can be a new creation – because you are worthy. And I want other people to know and experience this, too.”

I guess the calling will always remain, and it will never change regardless of the circumstances we are in. Although hindi ko talaga pwedeng takasan ang calling because Christ is in my name. Unless I read my name backwards. 😅 Kidding aside, hindi ako pwedeng tumalikod sa calling because Christ already lives in me. 🙏

As my life verse goes, “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” – Philippians 4:13. And I will also add that I can do all these things because aside from Christ, I also have people who can help me do the work for the Lord no matter how daunting – they are the body of Christ. ♥️

“Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory He will reveal to us later.” – Romans 8:18

P.S. Every church has its own flaws and weaknesses because the enemy will continue to attack it. But for as long as Jesus remains to be the center of the church, be in that spiritual family. And even if you’ve gone astray, come back. 🙏

Photo of the Day | 10-18-2023

Posted on October 18, 2023 by Christine Lailani

God is truly amazing. He knows how tiring (but very productive) this day was for me, and He knows exactly what will make my heart flutter.

When I was about to pick some Blue Butterfly Pea flowers for tonight’s tea, this was the spectacular view that greeted me – a beautiful butterfly perched just beside the flower. ❤️

*Blue Butterfly Pea Flower & A Real Butterfly*

And because I’m physically exhausted, my brain can no longer come up with enough words to describe the following random thoughts that popped up in my head in the last couple of days. You might want to search them on Google instead. 😉

– Armageddon (not the movie)

– Revelation 16:16

– woman, child, and dragon

– Caden

For Caden, I just had this sudden thought last week of having a baby boy for my firstborn (if I can choose 😀). And I saw the name Caden while browsing on the internet, and I felt like I also wanted that name as one of my choices for my baby’s name if ever.

My other choice for my future (if God wills it) child’s name is Zaphen, which is short for Zaphenath, Joseph “The Dream Interpreter’s” Egyptian name. When I search for Caden on the internet, it means “warrior,” “fighter,” “Spirit of Battle,” or “Spirit of War.”

That’s all for today. A blessed night, everyone! 🙏❤️

Where Do Souls Go? | Allhallowtide 2018 Special

Posted on November 1, 2018 by Christine Lailani

This was a topic that I already thought about when I was making my personal editorial calendar last July. I had no idea what to write for this topic back then but I just thought the title is suitable for the occasion. So methinks I’ll allow the Spirit’s leading. Little did I know God has already prepared the contents of this article beforehand. 😀

Last Sunday’s preaching was where I got the idea for this content. It was the part where Pastor Rev (as in Rev from “revelation?” I’d better ask him next time. :-D) explained the events in Revelation 21. He shared that when judgment day arrives, our souls will no longer go to heaven because there will be a new heaven and a new earth when God brings heaven here on earth.

But then, a question popped in my head and prompted me to ask hubby dear who’s seated beside me, “So, if souls don’t go to heaven, where do souls go when a person dies now?” My husband just smiled at me and I knew what he was thinking, “You need to ask God that because I can’t answer you.” 😀

Do Souls Really Linger in this World?

I searched the web all about where souls stay or go. I ended up reading the entire chapter of Revelation 21 yet again and all other sources I could find over the internet. Indeed, it was all a “revelation” to me.

Ah yes, 5 years of being a Christian and yet there are still a lot of things in the Bible that aren’t clear to me or have to be revealed to me yet. I guess this is part of every Christian’s walk and spiritual journey – wisdom is given not in one, single bulk, but through a series of learning.

So here are 3 ideas I have discovered today while doing my research on this topic:

1. Souls don’t go to heaven. Not yet.

So we have been believing in a misconception that when a person dies, his/her soul goes to heaven right away. There are verses in the Bible which explain that when our mortal bodies die, so do our souls. Our souls lie dormant waiting for Christ’s second coming, so to speak.

“The dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it.” – Ecclesiastes 12:7

The Return of the Lord

“And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died.

We tell you this directly from the Lord: We who are still living when the Lord returns will not meet him ahead of those who have died. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God.

First, the believers who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. Then we will be with the Lord forever. So encourage each other with these words.”

– 1 Thessalonians 4:13‭-‬18

2. Our souls aren’t immortal.

This supports idea #1. According to Bible Info, if we think of our souls as two separate entities, then that means our souls are immortal. But we all know that God is the only one who is immortal. This article continued explaining that this is the reason why Paul said that “the righteous seek for honor, glory, and immortality.” It means, immortality is something that is yet to be granted to us once Jesus resurrects us from the dead, gives us a new body, and we become a new creation living in the new heaven and earth along with Him.

The New Jerusalem

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the old heaven and the old earth had disappeared. And the sea was also gone. And I saw the holy city, the new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven like a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.

I heard a loud shout from the throne, saying, “Look, God’s home is now among his people! He will live with them, and they will be his people. God himself will be with them. He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.”

And the one sitting on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new!” And then he said to me, “Write this down, for what I tell you is trustworthy and true.” And he also said, “It is finished! I am the Alpha and the Omega—the Beginning and the End.

To all who are thirsty I will give freely from the springs of the water of life. All who are victorious will inherit all these blessings, and I will be their God, and they will be my children.

“But cowards, unbelievers, the corrupt, murderers, the immoral, those who practice witchcraft, idol worshipers, and all liars—their fate is in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.”

– Revelation 21:1‭-8

3. Not all souls will go to heaven.

Both evil and righteous souls lie dormant waiting for the resurrection during judgment day. According to the sources I have found, there are two places where people will go during judgment day: resurrection in the new heaven and earth or eternal life and resurrection in eternal condemnation or hell.

Indeed, heaven is God’s home and we can never go home yet without settling our “accountability” first in this present earth. 😉 But for now, let’s remember those who are with our Creator already during this 3-day observance of Allhallowtide. ❤

Feeling soulful today,

It’s 2018!

Posted on January 13, 2018 by Christine Lailani

Fiery 2018 New Year date with sparkling trails

Photo credit: Christmas Stock Images

Hello, everyone! I am back and I am sooooo excited to be back! I have so many things to post (all saved as drafts on my phone) and yet so little time! 😉

I am actually on bed rest because I caught the flu bug and I’ve been sick for almost two weeks now. I easily get sick but I prefer not to take meds and train my body to boost its own immune system. Anyway, I still want to make good use of my idle time while I still have the free time. Thus, the post. 😀

So, if you’ve been following my blog for quite some time now, I usually don’t have a blog entry in the month of December for 2 reasons – it is my birth month and busy holidays. I also take this time off from social media as my own year-ender fasting in deep retrospect.

Speaking of fasting, I think you all know we also have a week-long fasting in our church at the beginning of every year. So the January blog entry is, for me, VERY spiritual and personal. 🙂

No, I won’t cry a river in this post like I did the past years. But if I do shed a tear, that tear is precious. It speaks volume of the countless blessings and answered prayers I had back in 2017.

Ah yes, the Lord is GOOD! Freedom from the stronghold of the enemy, freedom at its finest, indeed. 🙂

2018 is FREEDOM. 🙂

Yes, the year 2017 fared fairly well for me and my hubby and our families. We did have some setbacks but the year ended with such a pretty awesome bang. What I meant by a “bang” is one major prayer request being answered – restoration of broken relationships through sincere forgiveness. Not mine though, God answered it at the beginning of the year 2017. But this is for people we’ve been praying for.

Thus, I just smiled my widest ever smile when on the first day of our prayer and fasting in church, I randomly saw this after accompanying my sister and bro-in-law at the airport:

God is good all the time, all the time God is good. 🙂

The tangible assurance is there. God is always with us – Emmanuel. This is the reason for the season as they say. Personally though, I celebrate Jesus’ birth every single day. I thank Him every day for the greatest gift I have received from the Father which is salvation. December 25 for me is just a widespread, massive, collaborative celebration of the Savior’s birth worldwide.

Since I got saved back in 2013, I have seen the works of the Lord not just in me but through the people around me and even with the nations. I have learned since that year until now the very essence of Ecclesiastes 3, the joy of patiently waiting on the Lord, the complete trust, and the faith that we have such a great God though what we see around is the complete opposite.

I do not intend to make this post a very long one like my previous January posts. But that is only because I intend to write short posts once a week. The prayer and fasting at the beginning of this year imprinted on me these verses:

“Do not neglect the spiritual gift you received through the prophecy spoken over you when the elders of the church laid their hands on you.” – 1 Timothy 4:14

“Give your complete attention to these matters. Throw yourself into your tasks so that everyone will see your progress.” – 1 Timothy 4: 15

This blog came alive right after I got saved. A very trying circumstance prompted me to make one. I made this first out of a need then, later on, I realized God used that circumstance and turned it around to serve His purpose. This blog now serves as the “megaphone” for my faith.

No, I dare not turn my back from my calling – sharing of faith-based testimonials through this blog. God knows there is a possibility I will because of other priorities. But God demands He remains the #1. Thus, the reminders. 🙂

From me, my hubby and our families, let’s all claim for a fruitful 2018 come what may and cheers to more upcoming posts that will glorify His Name!

“As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” – Joshua 24:15

The Ginete Family (missing Ate Ayn and her hubby) with our 94-year old maternal grandma. 🙂

The Ginete Family, now reunited with Ate Ayn and her hubby but still missing another sibling and our parents. 😀

The Rome Family missing my Dad-in-law. 🙂

Always remember, our God is ALWAYS WITH US. Seek Him and you will find Him. ❤

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” – John 15:5

P.S.

My future posts will be written through a mash-up of my native language (Filipino) and English. We have a very rich language and the Spirit also imprinted I use it often. I am sure Google Translator will do a fantastic job of translating them for you all. Or better yet, you can try learning our language too. I say, “yes” to the latter. 😉

Resting in His Saving and Amazing Grace

Posted on May 19, 2017 by Christine Lailani

“Do one thing: Live the life you always wanted to live. Avoid criticizing others and concentrate on fulfilling your dreams. This may not seem very important to you, but God, who sees all, knows that the example you give is helping Him to improve the world. And each day, He will bestow more blessings upon it.”

– Manuscript of Accra, Paulo Coehlo

I can see the cursor blinking in and out like an ellipsis….

So many words and yet so many ways to tell, undecided…

….how do I begin? 🙂

Yes, how do I begin testifying to a series of events that piled up already and yet I couldn’t find the “tugging” to post them until just now? *wink* Honestly, I still don’t have the slightest idea how to arrange the thoughts which have been sitting as a draft since February here in WordPress and share them. Yet I can only trust the Spirit’s leading on how the wordplay will come about in this post.

The posts in this blog for the past 2-3 years have been about nothing else but faith. This was how God intended it to be. Though for the first year of this blog I was grappling on what to write about, now, it is the other way around – I am battling with time for the numerous pending posts that I needed to write and post.

For March, it’ll summarize what went on from February until March. My January post summarized what transpired in the months of December and January. The month of March was about marching forward and yes, the character trait for March is CLARITY. As for February, it was AFFECTION (do read January post for this one.) 🙂

February: AFFECTION

March: CLARITY

This might explain why I was missing in the blogosphere for the month of February and why this post is super long (sorry about that, friends). February was the month of settling things – again, not a coincidence, but I have learned to rely on God’s plans all along even though some are hard to accept, some are hard to understand, and some are impossible to achieve. But then, that is one tough responsibility of a Christian and that is everyone’s calling too – live by faith and not by sight.

Last December, everything was unraveled. It was a moment of choosing among a multitude of choices and tough decisions. Every flaw, every need and every concern were brought out in the open. I have thought for that moment it might seem such an endless feat of emotional roller coaster and yet God had been faithful enough.

Fast forward to January, the start of 2017 was also the start of the turnaround of events. When seasons change and the comfort zone is no longer part of the next plans, it could be daunting. But as it was written, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:7

February was a month jam-packed of events. When you are caught in a whirlwind of events, oftentimes a “soul check” may come as the least of your priorities. But in faith, it is the other way around – a “soul check” is necessary and should be the top priority before everything else. That was what happened in the last few months, a question of am I doing it God’s way or not. I’ll just mention a few and most of them actually were answered prayers – prayers that I never thought I have prayed and yet silently in my heart, I did. Only God sees our hearts, anyway.

Maybe that is the reason why fulfillment in those answered prayers never really came from receiving the actual answer to the prayer per se but more about how God listens and how great He is to provide even the most impossible. It was all about God in the end, never about our desires but a satisfied desire on both our end and God’s that thru this fulfillment, we have established a kindred spirit and a deeper and personal relationship with our Creator. It is all a matter of communicating between Him and you alone – the ONLY thing that He asks from us.

So let’s begin the long journey of disclosing in this online journal what traversed in my moment of hibernation in the blogosphere starting February.

The incident:

A convo between my husband and I took place wherein I asked him what is it that he wants best in this life. His answer made me smile and speechless at the same time making me wonder where he could possibly be generating all these answers. My best guess – the heart. Who really am I to judge, indeed? I don’t see the heart, God does. 😉

“I don’t want material things but eternal rest.”

We came to that point wherein we had that (serious) husband and wife contemplation about priorities, the future and life in general. I can say that throughout the moments since I got saved, I did not regret any decision I have made which included my decision to marry. It is only through the entire duration of our years together as a married couple did I get to see why God gave me my husband in particular – I had so many answered prayers through my husband. It is either an answered prayer to that change I have been rooting to do internally but don’t have the guts to discipline myself or the big and small things that I have been wanting in my heart but never expressed them openly.

But God, once again, proved Himself faithful all throughout.

I have always wondered what if I married another man. Will he be patient, understanding and forgiving enough as my husband is right now to me and my circumstances? I oftentimes ask my husband how he feels regarding our situation and ask him to be patient with me as well and what I am going through. His answer was always a gentle, “I understand.” Though he would always say that, I know that he is sacrificing so much for both of us and as his partner, I have felt this inadequacy when it comes to fulfilling my role and my duties as a wife.

Starting the month of January until now, this was personally, for me, a season of instability. Firstly, every married couple gets to deal with financial difficulties and this season, my husband and I are going through with our own fair share. We have decided to finally move out from the apartment that my sisters and I have been living in for the past 20 years though it was only me who lived in the place for the last 7 years. We have decided to relocate near his workplace as it is more convenient for him and he gets to rest right away after work.

But this posed as a problem since I have no work when we both decided to move out and we are relying on my husband’s income alone for our daily expenses. If you’ll do the numbers from bills to necessities plus all the home stuff that we have to buy, the total suggested more funds. I did get a job. It was a convenient one but, unfortunately, it was not from my field of expertise and ironically, my water loo too – finance. Yes, it has something to do with numbers and money.

If you are wondering how I ended up in that job, I don’t know too. 😀 But I know God has a reason why because I got that job just 3 days after we moved in our new apartment. We were able to buy some of the basic stuff that we need at home. But as you all know it, I had to let the job go. I will not be able to give my best if it is something that I am not familiar with or is not my cup of tea. Numbers make me cringe and the fear of committing a mistake when it comes to computing plus the fact that it deals with money just proved that I might regret it later if I stayed longer. Another thing too, the worry of it all just took the better part of me and stress replaced what used to be a hopeful and positive attitude – I first thought I should give it a try. Employment equates to stress but when I started having stomach problems, difficulty sleeping at night and puking for no reason at all, I know I have to make a decision.

I wanted to go back to teaching. It was actually the very reason I stated when I resigned. The calling of being a teacher is greater. But then again, we all know that a teaching job is even more challenging when it comes to classroom management, multitasking, time management, etc. Again, no employment is ever easy and stress-free. But then again, I did want to try it out. Here came the opportunity – I had everything carefully and perfectly planned out so I’d get the job. But here came unprecedented circumstances which for the first few, I was able to gain control over but it required my husband and me to stay up until past midnight. I was able to pull it off. The next day I woke up with my estimated schedule. Everything should be smooth sailing until news came that the MRT 3 broke down and became operational only at 8am. I didn’t give up. If commuting was not an option then I’d go for the GRAB car – I was wrong. Since majority of the stranded commuters chose other alternatives of commuting, traffic was inevitable and it was worse than the usual. I decided by then that I had to let the opportunity go because it only means that it wasn’t intended for me. If I still pursued it then most likely I’ll be going against the grain of fate and will meet more unfortunate events along the way.

I am well aware of the idea to keep on swimming ahead even if the vision before you is hazy or the waters seem to be too deep and troubled or the shore is nowhere to be seen, figuratively speaking. But I am also well aware that from what I have experienced so far, if everything seems to be failing even if you have tried all possible attempts in getting things right, it only means it is beyond your control and God has intended a different plan for you. It could be God’s way of preventing you from any future loss/failure, future pain, even more hassle and inconvenience than intended.

So I asked God why I can’t have a regular office job. That moment of quietude with Him and me asking all these sort of questions trying to make sense of what has happened and what is happening came to a final halt – a matter of life and death.

I have already mentioned this a couple of times in my previous blog posts and health wise, I know I have nothing to fear. In the recent medical checkup I came clear but if I am not cautious enough i.e. check my lifestyle, sleeping patterns, food intake, physical activity, etc., and all these accumulated through the years could mean my ending up in a hospital bed earlier than expected.

I have to be cautious with everything.

I am not claiming it but I know it as a fact that I am a carrier of cancer genes. It was a generational curse – it didn’t skip a generation starting from my great grandmother (we don’t know if it started even way before her generation) to my grandmother then to my Mom. They were all breast cancer survivors. Most likely you’ll tell me I will survive too. 🙂

Yes, by faith and by God’s saving grace I know I will. But then it should not be reason enough for me to be complacent. My great grandmother, grandmother and Mom spent most of their lives in the province – a laid back lifestyle, pure simplicity, a fresh and clean environment and less complicated than city life. I spent half of my life in the metro starting college which was the opposite.

Again. I have to be more cautious.

If you will notice, I referred to breast cancer in the past tense because I am declaring that starting from my generation, not one among my 3 sisters and I will have breast cancer how many years from now and that the future generations of our family will be free of this generational curse.

There’s another generational curse too that I am declaring for my family and relatives and the future generations in our blood line to be free from starting with our generation but due to its sensitivity, I chose to keep it confidential.

These generational curses have no cure – ONLY God can deliver us from these curses. Not even the fields of medicine and science have the capacity to provide a lasting treatment/solution.

But,

“We can face the reality of our own mortality because we trust in God.” – Our Daily Bread

“Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” – Psalm 90:12

Another thing too, my husband and I have been trying to have a child but time declared we can’t have one as of yet. We did talk about it and he told me that whatever God’s will is, he is happy and content either way.

That, I absolutely and unquestioningly agree upon. I did tell him though that as much as I’d want to have a child, I wouldn’t want to raise a child and let him suffer in this world or be punished for the mistakes that his parents did or bear the generational curse passed on to him. If part of the sacrifice that we have to make in order to break the generational curse is to be childless, then we have to honor it.

But then again, it entirely depends on what God’s will is and what His plans are. Indeed,

“As you do not know the way the Spirit comes to the bones in the womb of a woman with child, so you do not know the work of God who makes everything.” – Ecclesiastes 11:5

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:9

The generational curses and the current situation my husband and I are going through both have one thing in common – stress as the triggering factor.

Looking back to what I had to give up, they were standards that this world dictated as what should be accomplished and yet it all equated to stress. When I gave up my graduate study, I asked myself if it is worth it especially when my eczema attacks started showing up again, I had to deal with black spots in my legs which lasted for how many months and I experienced tension headaches/migraines which lasted for 3 days twice a month. I also had to give up the liberty and privilege of working in the corporate world or in my field of expertise.

Do I have regrets? Certainly not. My decision to not conform to the terms of this world won’t rob me of my dignity and make me less of a woman, will it? My identity no longer is attached to those titles that this world offer but to the title that God has given me – His princess and His loving daughter.

“Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

My situation now? God showed me other alternatives. I know God did not give me skills just to see them all go to waste until I die and not be able to contribute to this world and help humanity in any way – it’ll make Him unhappy. 😀 I told my husband he need not worry because there are a lot of home-based jobs available for me in the fields of teaching and writing, my two best fortes, if I really need to get a professional job as a means to get an income. There are so many of them actually in different fields of expertise and if I will be “takaw tingin,” I’d prefer having at least 2 since their schedules are usually flexible. BUT, God will definitely say “No.” 😀

In addition, I have witnessed a lot of female friends who shifted from being corporate employees to staying at home, being a full-time Mom and housewife with a home-based job, stressed also but FULFILLED receiving the same salary that she gets if she works in the office spending energy and time commuting, coming home extremely exhausted and has no time for her family.

Yes, fulfillment makes all the difference, right? Even if you are paid triple of what a regular wage earner gets if the fulfillment isn’t there, work will just be equated to work per se in all technical aspect of the term. Aside from that, “whatever it is that our hearts value, there our treasure will be also.” The bad thing about this is if we’re putting our hope on treasures that are temporary and will eventually fade away. Building relationships with people I love are important to me – quality time is my love language. I want to invest more in it – being with my family.

What else?

As of the late, my husband asked me if I could do commissioned work for my sketching hobby after I posted the sketch (next blog article) I did of him during his birthday last May 4. He told me that one of his Mom’s friends asked if I could do their family portrait and his Mom and brother also requested the same along with a few of my relatives and friends ever since I posted some of my previous sketches. My answer was an unsure “let’s see.” 😀

If God gives us a talent as a gift, He has a very good purpose behind it all and honestly, I am not yet confident enough to take my sketching hobby to a higher level. 😀 It’s been 15 years since I started this hobby out of my need to have an outlet when things and times get rough. I am not confident as well to tag a price in each of my art work. I intended to give them for free actually and make the recipient of the art work happy – my ultimate goal as an artist. But if God instructs I have them paid, then I believe I should. Now this, I need to really pray hard as I don’t want to disappoint those who have requested to have their sketches done and there are a lot of them pending requests already. I just need more time to pray to God about it and wait for His answers. *insert wide smile here*

Another opportunity also came about my putting up a restaurant/café after hubby and I made this special burger recipe and his brother insisted we make it as a business as he knows someone who can be our supplier. I told him we talked about this option but we have chosen my hometown in Bicol as our business location – yup, you guessed that right, too far. My 3^rd sister and I have actually planned about this already and came up with the concept for the café and went through the basics of business analytics and management and the only thing she said was that it won’t materialize if I am not there with her to get things started and to keep them running. One of my hobbies is cooking and experimenting with different recipes but eating the food I cooked is not part of them. lol I believe I am to blame if hubby gained a lot of weight after we got married. Ooops, not my real intention there though. 😀 I just want to cook for other people and it makes me happy when they are happy with the dishes I serve them. Again, this is another prayer for my prayer line when it comes to wisdom, guidance and instruction.

Honestly, I was never after the money nor the recognition – getting compensated for the things I love to do and the things that God has gifted me with in terms of talents and skills. I’d like to contribute and share them to society and be able to make every individual happy and fulfilled or if what I contributed could help them in any other way regardless if I’d get anything in return or not (awards, recognition, money, etc.). I only needed money for survival and for now, that is what my hubby and I needed – for our daily needs but never to satisfy our wants and live in excess.

Moreover, I told my husband that if time comes God blessed us with more than we needed, I will retain the kind of lifestyle I have now and would still prefer the same living conditions – not a lavish nor grand lifestyle but a simple, minimalist one. Again, by having only the things that I need and never the things that I want.

Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” – Mark 10:21

But as we all know it, I can plan so many things, have so many choices and wonderful opportunities to choose from and small and big decisions to make and yet, “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.” – Proverbs 19:21

Thus, I rest my case. 😀

For all the generational curses, the lifestyle check, the shift in opportunities, the continued pursuit of God’s will in my life – they were not because I live in fear but because I have fear in the Lord and if obedience is what He requires of me in this season so He can usher me towards what He desires for my life, then I should, by all means comply, stop figuring out this life on my own and rest in His saving grace.

Solution? Pray harder and trust God and His plans even harder.

[In prayer we call on God “who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine.”] – Ephesians 3:20

Oh and I think I forgot to mention that in my Paulo Coehlo planner-turned-spiritual journal, April’s character trait is COOPERATION and May is FAITH.

April: COOPERATION

May: FAITH

Did God say, “Tin, you must cooperate with me and have faith?” I think He just did that’s why I wrote this. *insert wide smile here again* 😀

“Since we have these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from every defilement of body and spirit, bringing holiness to completion in the fear of God.” – 2 Corinthians 7:1

P.S.

For the first quarter of year 2017, my life/planner went from having TOLERANCE (January), giving AFFECTION (February), to achieving CLARITY (March), giving COOPERATION (April) and last but not the least, having FAITH (May). 🙂

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

“Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm for God can be trusted to keep His promises.” – Hebrews 10:23

“God can be trusted to guide us.” – Our Daily Bread

“…the challenge is to trust (in) God’s ability to lead rather than in our ability to follow.” – Genesis 12:1

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” – Romans 8:28

Angel, Did You?

Posted on July 9, 2016 by Christine Lailani

FinalFeather

Angel, did you…?

Did you graze upon our home and left this proof of your presence? 😀

Okay, now this belongs to a bird, a small one, which frequents my little garden at the back of our apartment to get bits of a pot made from coconut husk to build for its nest.

But for angels, it oftentimes occurred to me that they do exist with us except that they are not the ones which we commonly imagine or how angels are portrayed in children’s books – with wings of fluffy feathers as white as snow and with silken, long white robe.

I have read in the book of Revelation that angels are actually very huge beings which do not take the form of a human. They usually come in a bright light which, I believe, is where the “white figure” idea of an angel came from.

I know angels can also be spirits and yet there is only one Spirit that lives in all of us – that which is of Jesus Christ, the one He sent to be with us when it was time for Him to physically take leave of this world and be with His Father in Heaven.

But then again, childhood memories are not easy to erase. Though I believe in the Spirit and acknowledge His presence in my life everyday, I will still stick with my bright, feathery angel and this photo I’ve randomly taken will remind me of that. 😉 ❤

“The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear Him, and delivers them.” – Psalms 34:7

P.S.

I don’t have any formal training in photography and I just shoot when I want with what I want on who I want. But I guess you don’t have to travel far and be in grand and new places to enhance your photography skills. Same thing with writing. I was trained to write scholarly and academic papers back in college and even now in my graduate study and the jargon is totally different to that of feature writing like this one which has a very casual tone.

But in life, faith in God and experiences taught me more than the technicalities of photography and writing per se for they taught me more about one thing – appreciation. It was actually my faith followed by my transformation/salvation that brought this blog to life, not to impress readers nor gain followers and likes but to express my thoughts and honor my God.

I was then urged to make the mundane interesting by appreciating what is already in front of me a.k.a. what I can make out of what I already have – God’s love. This is what I call the by-product of “eyes being opened.”

Then, everything becomes worth capturing – they all now have a story to tell. All we have to do is take on the Spirit’s leading in His ways and in His time when to share them. 🙂

A More Appreciative 2016

Posted on January 21, 2016 by Christine Lailani

Ahhh, yes. FINALLY. 🙂

It feels good to be back posting my thoughts in this special place I call “blog.” It’s been a month since I last posted as I’ve promised myself to keep the holidays as solemn as possible – an opportunity to spend quality time with me and my husband’s families and loved ones which equates to less social media interaction and doing the actual interaction with people. Yes, I still believe forging stronger relationships can only be done through meaningful conversations, moments of laughter, of just sitting there, reminiscing and just being with people you love.

Honestly and personally, the beginning of this year didn’t start well for me and my family. An incident during the New Year’s eve wherein my niece had a bad fall while we were using sparklers and a disagreement with my hubby made me tell him that this was the first New Year’s eve that didn’t go right and as happy or perfect. I thought of it as a sign or a meaning that is not just what the circumstances obviously portray.

I was too fearful back then and it was this fear that held back my freedom to try enjoyable and good things. But since I got saved, I channeled these fears of mine through prayers and relied on to God for courage. And what I will share are more like God’s answers in a visible way – a way in which we, humans, can relate. Although faith is the assurance of something that we do not see, and yet God also makes us feel His presence in ways that we can relate.

The first of these was a very visible sign – a rainbow. I know as a kid what rainbows meant, they appear after a storm. When I was in high school, Science have taught me how rainbows were created, it’s called prism. But it is God who taught me now what they really are for – to give hope. When my husband and I went to my hometown in Bicol which was struck by the typhoon Nona, the worst that was listed in the history of the town, we saw the devastation it brought upon my townspeople.

As our bus was getting nearer our hometown, I struggled to hold back the tears as I felt a piercing in my heart from what I saw – every house that we passed by was destroyed, completely roofless or blown away, electricity lines were all down, and the once luscious greenery was now leafless, brown and lifeless. I so felt the heaviness inside my heart that if given a private moment at that time, I want to drop down on my knees and weep. I know I have every right to ask God “why?” but I know God has a good reason for everything and I just have to continue seeing the good in every situation. Thus, I prayed silently in my heart – that God would give us hope.

We arrived home and was glad that my parents and my sister were safe and was extremely grateful that not one of our properties near our home was destroyed – not even our tree house! Which really was, for me, a miracle. It also survived super typhoon Yolanda in 2013.

Though it lifted my spirits up, I cannot stop thinking about those who will celebrate the holidays without shelter, without clean clothes, without electricity, food and jobs.

It was still early in the morning so my husband and I took the opportunity to go out the balcony at the second floor of our house which faces the rice fields and some houses. Lo and behold, our arrival was greeted by a rainbow in its full spectrum – colors as complete and as bold as they are from one end to the other. This was the first rainbow appearance that I have gazed in my entire life that is so complete. Both my husband and I were amazed, so he decided to capture the moment.

Since that day, we often see rainbows, sometimes two rainbows at the same time even. And my husband and I would just gaze up with a smile. Until came the day for us to leave my hometown. It was my sister’s birthday and to our surprise, an electrician came up to our house and informed us that they are now reinstalling electricity. Wow! We weren’t expecting it to be that soon as reports said it will take about 4-6 months to put up electric posts and lines. We teased my sister that she got the best birthday gift ever from God – electricity. 😀

And on that same day, as my husband and I boarded the bus and we were slowly leaving the town, I saw yet another rainbow in its full spectrum. As close as before even though we were in a moving vehicle. I tugged my husband’s arm and pointed the rainbow to him, that’s when I realized what God meant by rainbows. The power lines and electricity being restored were just a few of the many promises that God will fulfill and the rainbow was His sign of that promise. 🙂

PhotoGrid_1452562108095

The second was during the Prayer and Fasting. My hubby and I were having disagreements about future goals that it came to the point wherein emotions were escalating. I went ahead and grabbed a stick note that belonged to my sister to better illustrate my point and started flipping its pages to find a new one when out fell a very old piece of paper. I could tell by the corners of it turned yellow by old age. I was still explaining while picking up this paper until something caught my eyes. The paper was a very old calling card and the most interesting thing about it was the name printed on that calling card, the name of a clinic – God’s Way Diagnostic Center. It looked too old that I was not even sure if the clinic still exists. 🙂

I have long given up the notion that everything happens coincidentally. Nothing happens by chance, perhaps by choice and yet there is this idea of the Grand Plan – God’s will. So I stopped talking, my husband also followed suit. I looked closely at the calling card and scrutinized every detail in it. I laughed. I smiled. My mood changed and here I was just savoring everything that was there in the calling card. Take note of what I have discovered: “God’s Way,” “man,” “United Nations,” Noe Lordan,” and “Sure ka dito.”

PhotoGrid_1452562556835

I interpreted God’s message as this, if my husband and I continue to insist what we both wanted which is different from one another, we will be disappointed, we will be furious, we will have a fight and there will be no peace. BUT if we choose God’s way, then man will be united through the Lord and we will be sure of it.

I shared this to my husband, and we both agreed – God will give us the wisdom and will guide us in making the right decision in His time and at the right place. We have decided then to just include what we were disagreeing about in our Prayer and Fasting, which are now among our faith goals and settled the matter in peace. 🙂

Last but not the least is the color “orange.” Yes, I am supposed to write this article 2nd week of January but I haven’t felt the urge to do so. And now I realized why. My sharing of testimony/revelations won’t be complete as some of them will take place just the 2nd week of January. Yes, everything in God’s time indeed. 🙂

So what about orange? Well, during the holidays I have received gifts from my loved ones and not that I am materialistic but because I am a keen observer, I was able to piece everything together. Or maybe God intended I find it out. I used to own a pen from my brother’s wedding, a green one. Somebody borrowed it and forgot to return it. I loved the pen so I asked my brother if he has spare ones. He said yes and circumstances aligned in a way that the only free time he can give it to me was over the holidays. So I got hold of the pen during the holidays and he asked me to choose from 3 colors – orange, green and blue. Blue is my favorite color, but this time, the orange pen attracted me in such a way that I chose it over the blue one. There were only two left of that color.

Then, when I opened my brother and sister-in-law’s gift to me, it was my favorite Paulo Coelho planner. Now this planner also has a very meaningful part in my spiritual journey as a Christian. And maybe that is the reason why for 3 consecutive Christmases now, I have been receiving this planner from my brother. To which I am very grateful. Nothing is ever meaningful than to write over something that God has meant for you to write on. And guess what the dominant color is in the abstract design of the cover? It is orange. 🙂

I still wasn’t amazed by the orange thing until I remembered our Prayer and Fasting manuals, the dominant color is orange amid the black and yellow. So now…..I am beginning to wonder. There is no coincidence with God, right? 🙂

I thought, there is something that God wanted me to find out with this orange thing. I shared this to my husband and told him, I still can’t decipher what this orange means but I know God wanted to tell me something or He wanted me to know something. This was 1st week of January. We finished the Prayer and Fasting already and yet no clear answers.

Then 2nd week of January came. My sister from Norway arrived and she brought with her gifts from her travel to Prague in Czech Republic. She made my husband and I choose between gold and bronze key chains with the engraved names of Praha and Ceska Republika. My husband chose the gold one and I happily settled with the bronze key chain. And while I was taking a macro shot of it, I noticed that bronze has a similar color to orange like tangerine. Except that it is darker. SO the orange thing was there again even from far, far away like Prague. 😉

2016-01-09 10.06.22

Now I believe God has intended I come to the conclusion of my findings. Something within me spurred the thought that I forgot to read all my devotion in Our Daily Bread since December 20 until December 31 so I did my backlogs. And voila, here’s the finding. In the December 25 devotion, the title is “Christingle.” It’s just like my name Christine, without the “g” and the “l.” Well, the reason why my Mom named me Christine was because I was born on December 22, Christmas time. 😉

Christingle

AND here’s what I found out about Christingle. Do read along the devotion in the picture and be amazed. 🙂

Here’s a definition of the color orange as well:

Orange is the colour between red and yellow on the spectrum of light, and in the traditional colour wheel used by painters. Its name is derived from the fruit orange.

In Europe and America orange is commonly associated with amusement, the unconventional, extroverts, warmth, fire, energy, activity, danger, taste and aroma, the autumn season, and Protestantism. In Asia it is an important symbolic colour of Buddhism andHinduism.^{[1] – Wikipedia}

In other sources, orange also means joy and creativity. I was just fascinated to find out one of the meanings of “orange” in the Wikipedia definition which is Protestantism – the religion I grew up with as a child through my grandmother, the daughter of one of the pioneers of the Protestant church in our hometown.

My grandmother is for me the epitome of a woman of faith. No other woman have I encountered who has as much devotion in faith as she has through the 91 years of her life. We were able to visit her during the holidays and when I saw her, tears came running down my cheeks as I hugged her. She was bedridden from a bad fall and yet we can feel that her spirit is strong. There came a moment when she told us that she is already tired and she does not want us to live as long as she did. But my eldest sister assured her that God still has a purpose why she has to live that long. My only prayer to God for my grandmother is that she will have the peace in her heart that her family will always be guided by God and that her prayers were never unanswered. 🙂

So now I would like to end this article with the question from the theme of our Prayer and Fasting this year:

“Would you dare to believe?” 🙂

And also with this official soundtrack from the movie Prince of Egypt which I know has something to do with me planning to name our first baby boy with Zaphen, from Joseph’s Egyptian name Zaphenath Paneah. 😉

Though Whitney Houston died a tragic death, this song will always remind me of my memory of her and what this song aims to instill in our hearts – how to believe and have faith even with the impossible.

And it has now become my tradition to include a prayer in the very first article that I will write for the new year here in my blog. Please pray this prayer with me my dear brothers and sisters:

“Dear Father,

Though we do not see the future and though fear may start to creep in our hearts for the many trials and challenges, the “giants” that will come our way, we pray that You give us the courage and the strength to overcome them all. Please guide and protect us as we continue to tread along the journey that you have set out for us to accomplish.

We are rest assured that You are and will be with us in all that we will go through. We claim that in the name of Your Son, Jesus, we will will not just be conquerors but we will be game-changers and leaders in spreading Your Word and Your Love.

Thank you for the many things and the many ways that You have assured us of the Grace, the Love and the Hope. We will continue to seek for Your Name and we will give You all the glory and honor that You deserve.

Please teach us how to be more appreciative of the things that we have through what You have given, to be joyful despite the storms and may You continue to be our source of Light despite the darkness around us.

We send this prayer from our hearts with all our love and through the mighty name of Your Son, Jesus,

Amen.”

Let’s have a more appreciative 2016, everyone! 🙂 ❤

What’s In A Name and A Number

Posted on August 27, 2015 by Christine Lailani

What’s with numbers?

I was already prompted to list down this topic a few months back, 6/26 to be specific. But it stayed as a draft until now, 7/27.

I guess one reason was that I only have limited information to share about it at that time. But the Spirit knew that time will come, this article will be published in its due time and will bear more meaning, which is today.

If you will look closely at the time, yup, I had this revelation during my “creative waking hour.” That particular time starting 10 in the evening until midnight. If you have read my previous articles like this one – https://thejourneymansmoments.wordpress.com/2015/07/13/the-promise-rings-2/, it’ll give you a bit of information already regarding the significance of numbers, including time, in the bible. But then, it was a bit vague for me before. But now, looking into the topic deeper made me understand things even better – an enlightenment yet again.

Which will bring us to this conclusion: God did not create Mathematics, numbers, formulas and figures for nothing. Yes, obviously they are what makes some innovations and technologies run in the present day such as the world wide web which is composed of a system or network that deals mostly with numbers.

BUT, a deviation from that is the idea or assumption that God also embedded numerical figures in the Scripture to also serve as “solutions” to “problems” to “make things work.” I know Mathematicians (like a brother in Christ of mine) will agree that the solution to a Mathematical problem is through formulas/computations to arrive to a CLEAR and DEFINITE answer. 🙂

I interpret it in the bible as decoding the numerical symbols. Take note, I now used the word “symbol” which is also similar to “signs” and “codes.” But no, this is not an adaptation from Dan Brown’s Da Vinci Code. I am just sharing a wisdom that was passed on to me and it was out of my passion to seek for Godly wisdom that I believe led me to knowing more about the biblical significance of numbers – through the guidance of the Spirit of course. Reading this article might lead you too in studying more about the Scripture and the numbers and be enlightened, amazed and feel more connected to God. I cannot tell exactly if that is how you will be receiving the information as I believe each of one of us was called by the Spirit to learn and interpret things differently. What matters is how POSITIVE the learning experience was for you.

If it led you to disillusionment or posed more doubts and negative questions, then possibly you need more of the Spirit’s guidance in interpreting what was given or shown to you – through a prayer. Seek for guidance and discernment as doubts will be the enemy’s weapon to use his most powerful way to trap you under his wing – deception and lies. Seek for the TRUTH. Pray it aloud, say it aloud to God, He will and He will lead you.

But if it led you to a positive response such as enlightenment, amazed, a clearer understanding of everything, a process of piecing one puzzle after the other leading to near completion, and a better appreciation of God’s Word, then it is by all means, a guided learning from the Spirit. Say a prayer of gratitude when this happens for wisdom doesn’t have a price tag, especially if they came from God. That is how precious it is and that is also why we should guard it at all costs by not allowing the enemy to use it against us through prayers. He did use it against Jesus but Jesus is the TRUTH and nothing can stand against the TRUTH. For He is the ONLY way and the LIGHT which is stronger than darkness.

As this article tells us that,

So let the fun “decoding” begin. 😉

Let me start by sharing the numbers that are usually attached to significant events that happened to me personally. These realizations came flooding in like one big bright light eureka moment just last night. Amazing, it is. 😀

2002-58885 (This is my student number or ID number in college where I am now completing my graduate study. We refer to this as our “life line” in UP Diliman as you will use it and you will be identified through it more often than you use your name in your entire stay in the university. Believe me, this is how the students connect with each other especially when it comes to “batches” and other interests come after this.)
8/8/2008 (This was my first job wherein I was able to the help the deaf and mute community by relaying their messages to bank representatives, restaurants, personal calls to families and relatives, etc. and allowed me an opportunity to save money and buy this laptop I am now using and my dslr – both are serving their purposes in fulfilling the mission God appointed to me.)
96 (This is my favorite pair of numbers as it stands for my first name which is Christine and my surname which is Ginete.
3/3/13 (This was the day of my salvation, the day that I was born again.)
8/17 (The very recent significant numbers, which is the date of my civil wedding.)

If you will notice, I never selected these numbers. Not even our civil wedding date (I will share more a bit later). Yes, it was predicted already even before the world begun. I think I know what you are thinking. 🙂

For starters, what’s the significance of my student number 2002-58885? Let’s remove 2002 and focus on 58885. In the bible, the number 5 represents “power and Divine grace.”

The number 8 symbolizes the number of salvation. And the “gematria of the name Jesus in Greek is 888: a trinity of eights, the fullness of salvation!”

To interpret my student number it will be this: Grace + Jesus Christ + Grace. 🙂

8/8/2008 was the year that I was hired at my first job, which originally operates after a good cause – that of helping the deaf and mute community in the US. I loved this job, the mission, my workmates, the financial benefits and this is the reason why I decided to pursue a graduate study in Special Education wherein providing assistance to the deaf and mute community is among the areas that this specialization covers. But God intended I leave the company, much to my regret, but it gave me the opportunity to pursue my graduate study full time.

Again, trinity of eights which represents the name of Jesus. Of course there is 2 or 20 but I know that this date is somehow special to me. Again, it is not a coincidence I got hired on this date. 🙂

96 is a pair of two numbers that represents the letters of my first and my last name. Thus, they became my favorite pair of numbers. Little did I know that it has a biblical significance. 9 is related to the number six as stated in the article below:

“It is significant of the end of man and the sum of all man’s works. Nine is therefore the number of finality or judgment.”

3/3/13 was the day of my salvation at the age of 27. According to the article below, 3 is the number of perfect completion for the Jews and it symbolizes the perfection of the Godhead – the Most Holy Trinity. More of this can also be found in this article:

8/17/15 was our civil wedding day. Yes, this is the newest entry in the revelations I’ve had pertaining to numbers. We actually didn’t plan this date as true enough to what our spiritual mentors told us, an engaged couple will be tested all the more as the engagement period gets longer. Two days prior to my claiming our Marriage License, there came a conflict that almost made us cancel the wedding. Indeed, the longer the engagement period becomes, the more that the enemy will get stronger in attempting to make the relationship fail so it wouldn’t end up in a marriage.

We only have two reasons why we pushed through with our civil wedding: loved ones from our families cannot come on the date that we have decided to have our church wedding this year and we were advised not to have a long engagement period.

And of course, since it is a special moment for me and it happened, I sought for the spiritual significance of the numbers. I am already familiar with the number 8 but I am not sure with 17. So I decided to search for it and it is through this need to learn about it that this article came into completion and I was able to slowly connect one dot from the other and put one piece of the puzzle after the other.

What was even amazing is that the combination of the numbers 7 and 8 “has a remarkable connection.”

And that the number 17 “symbolizes overcoming the enemy and complete victory.”

Therefore 8/17 means salvation/resurrection/new birth and overcoming the enemy/complete victory.

And here’s more…

We did not even predict that this will be our wedding day. And yet, when I checked my website out of the blue, I received a notification that my site statistics shoot up on this day. So out of curiosity, I checked it out. And here are my findings:

It is amazing how these numbers fell on the list: 8, 40, 7, 2, 33, 36, 5 which all are significant numbers in the Scripture. Which made me contemplate, were these 8 persons who viewed my page can be called as “angels?” 😀

What amazed me too is staring at this part of the statistics with mouth agape the following day:

I interpreted it as Holy Thursday or Thursday of Mysteries to some and there goes the 3:00 AM time frame. And guess what day is today? 🙂

What about the names?

I have previously contemplated and made an article on this or have mentioned this in my previous articles like my name Christine which means “a follower of Christ” and I ended up being married to a Joseph which I firmly believe as God’s will. And just a random thought came up how many months back that if ever I bear him a son for our firstborn, I will name him Zaphen which is short for the Egyptian name of Joseph, Zaphenath Paneah, meaning “ruler of nations.”

I mentioned in a previous article too regarding my husband’s Dad who has coworkers whose names are Job and Revelation. I have read the book of Job but I haven’t read the entire book of Revelation.

So that’s what I read just recently and a lot of thoughts came in. All were assumptions and yet I know I cannot claim with utmost authority they will turn out to be true. Well, the human part of me tells me I just have a mind of a writer that is why my imagination goes as far as it can go given some certain information – piecing the puzzle together. But I know all will be revealed in God’s perfect time according to God’s perfect ways. 🙂

But do allow me to share what my findings are which I find sort of interesting and exciting but with a little bit of fear and uncertainty. Yet God never fails to assure us in this verse:

Hebrew 10:43 NLT

“Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep His promise.”

The book of Revelation is all about Jesus’ second coming. If you haven’t read it, I suggest you read it as I believe God is calling us to read it. 🙂

It was indicated in the book what will happen in that second coming. There was a mention of the Great Earthquake, thunder, the 144,000 chosen people who will be saved (which includes those from the tribe of Joseph), the 7 churches, the angels, the devil, and lastly the woman who is pregnant with a baby who will rule the world and Satan chases after her so he could snatch the baby away from her but God made sure the woman and the baby are well-protected.

Me and my husband do not plan to have a baby this year, but if God wills it, then I know there will be a baby. If I conceive this month or next month, I am due to deliver the baby by May or June 2016.

The number of the enemy/beast/Satan is 666 or 616. My graduation date from my Master’s degree in UP Diliman falls on 6/26/2016. If I indeed graduate, which I really am hoping will happen, it will be freedom from the long struggle that I have been through trying to finish it for about 5 and 1/2 years now.

I can’t help but wonder, is 6/6/16 or 6/16/16 or 6/26/16 or the days after that be the moment that the reign of the enemy will end – Jesus will come? But then, only God REALLY knows when. 🙂

But when Jesus arrives, I have the Spikenard perfume to anoint Him, like what Magdalena did. Kidding. *wink* Well, honestly, arriving to this made me smile so big that I thought, “Okay Tin, people might think you are now talking rubbish.” Well, I have a God who does a lot of mysteries you can’t help but just smile your biggest and your sweetest when you encounter one. 😀

Sometimes knowing things makes you a bit scared but for the whole part, there goes the enlightenment. Usually it is associated to the purpose that God has called you to fulfill which is your mission. And yet, you will also be reminded of the verse I shared before this. There really is nothing to be afraid of or that maybe things happen by chance. For I believe they all happen because of a purpose – that of fulfilling God’s plans.

Prior to the wedding, I was so busy with everything and yet I felt the urge to share stuff about my faith on this blog but because I was so tired, I always would skip it until the next day. Until a sure message from the Spirit finally pushed me to sharing this. I encountered this comment from a cousin of mine (Hi Nadja! *wink*) in one of the bible verses I posted on Facebook. And I know it is one of the “gentle tuggings” calling me to go back to my mission – share my faith through my blog.

Do you believe in miracles? Yes, I do. Because I believe in God and in Jesus Christ, of whom all the wonders and mysteries in this world were made possible through faith. It’s just that my mind is very limited to knowing and interpreting the entirety of God’s plans and schemes and how they work because I am only human and I am no God. 😉

To end this, I will just share this devotion I had in one of my bible study plans from my You Version bible app and just want to highlight what faith and patient endurance mean. For I know that is what God wants us to have in preparation for the Second Coming. I know that for believers, it will be so much rejoicing and celebration – a very happy one. 🙂

“Genesis 37:1–36

Rachel, Jacob’s favorite wife, bore only two children: Joseph and Benjamin. She died giving birth to Benjamin, at which time Jacob seemed to transfer all his affection for her to Joseph. His favoritism stoked intense jealousy among Joseph’s ten older brothers, and Joseph’s dreams that they would all bow down to him pushed them over the edge.

Even though Joseph’s life seemed to go in the opposite direction of his dreams, God was already working to fulfill those dreams. That’s often how God’s promises function in our lives: We trust in God, but then our circumstances contradict our faith. In the process, our faith is stretched, strengthened and eventually satisfied. Sometimes that process takes years—it certainly did for Joseph—but in the end faith and patient endurance are duly rewarded.”

And last but not the least, it also came perfectly in time that one of my best soul sisters shared to me this great movie on Facebook just a few days after all of these revelations. I highly encourage you to watch this – just the perfect ending perfect to cap off this article. 🙂

We Just Don’t Know

Posted on August 15, 2015 by Christine Lailani

I was in the middle of washing dishes when a thought moved me to a realization, moved me to tears that moved me to declare God’s Greatness.

And the only thing I could blurt was: “How could I be so negative about everything just because what has happened or what is happening are not what I have expected?”

I have learned that working abroad and leaving your family behind is not an option for every couple. I believe this is the reason why more emphasis on this is given nowadays to every young couple. And though I have learned this now, it somehow gave me an opportunity to regard couples who have already made this decision in a negative way thinking why they made that decision or why did God allow them to make that decision – which is wrong.

Because by doing so I was judging them unknowingly. It was only today that the Spirit led me to God’s answers. A gentle tugging of the heart that led to once and again and as always – humility.

My fiance grew up in this set up. I do not know how it was for him as he never shared anything to me about this and I don’t want to be the first to ask him. Guys never share emotional stuff on a regular basis compared to the ladies. 😉

But I did feel the lack that he feels. Especially when as a future husband now, we got to talk things about priorities and me wanting my children to grow up in a setup wherein both of us are physically present advising him that their parents’ case is different than ours. And I cannot tell if I hurt him in one of those conversations touching one deep wound or scar.

And yet this is where God proved to be so faithful in His promises. When I met my fiance, he did not fulfill the requirements that our church asks in choosing a Godly man for a partner. But like I shared previously, my fiance believes in God, goes to church but did not go thru the “legalities” of the church to be saved or like how I was saved.

I prayed to God about this in the Prayer and Fasting 2014. And when we became a couple, I have made my decision without a doubt. But little did I know that this little “technical issue” could be used by the enemy to deceive me with his lies.

And yet I also believed that God allowed it to happen so I could be tested. A lot of conflicts came to the point that I always tell him it is because he is not yet that devoted that is why we are having these conflicts. And yet God would always rebuke me to the point of utmost humility that it is actually I who have so little faith.

This verse was His reminder:

“Yet we know that a person is made right with God by faith in Jesus Christ, not by obeying the law. And we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we might be made right with God because of our faith in Christ, not because we have obeyed the law. For no one will ever be made right with God by obeying the law.” – Galatians 2:16

Daily Devotion

And also this:

“Accept other believers who are weak in faith, and don’t argue with them about what they think is right or wrong.” – Romans 14:1

Then I told my fiance once that as my future husband he will be the spiritual leader of our family – a concept that he had a hard time grasping as he didn’t know how because this was not the kind of family he came from.

And yet God was so faithful. For though my fiance’s Dad is so far away from them and he gets to visit the family for a short period of time once a year, God still made sure he will fulfill his role as the spiritual leader of his family.

Yes, no oceans are wide enough and no land is ever far enough for God’s love and His promises to be fulfilled, which was the realization that I had just now.

My fiance shared to me that two of his dad’s best coworkers were here in the Philippines for a visit and requested they all have dinner with them. He told me that these two are the ones that his Dad are closest with at work and gets to share a lot of things with. And what I heard next from my fiance came as a surprise to me:

“They told me and Buds that my Dad would always tell them that they reminded him of his sons back home as they are our age. But what made me cry is when they told us that our Dad would tell them everything about us and how hard it is to live without your family.”

And it was also this that I cried. For I believe those two work buddies were actually angels sent by God to accompany my fiance’s Dad all throughout the different seasons that he is in away from home. God honored the sacrifice and yet it could also be so that God’s plans will be completed. For it was also through them that my fiance’s Dad exemplified the role as the spiritual leader of his family. For he would request my fiance to download podcasts during church service and the movies that he selected that has something to do with faith. My fiance gets to hear those podcasts and gets to download the movies and he gets to watch it too.

One of those two buddies also happen to have a fiance who is a SpEd teacher in California. The same as the field I am specializing right now and most definitely will be my future career too. 🙂

You wouldn’t believe me, but I know you would just like I did when my fiance told me what were the names of the two best buddies of his Dad at work – Job and Revelation. 😉

I have long held on to the fact that nothing is ever a coincidence with God may it be good or bad in our own knowledge and interpretation. And I believe it is in this faith that God made me see how true He is in His promises. I read the book of Revelation and it all came as a promise of an assured hope.

I held on to my relationship with my fiance though times would come that we are sure we could not see the light anymore and we are sure that we are becoming totally exactly the opposite that God wanted us to become – totally undeserving of His mercy and forgiveness. And yet God stayed faithful and true to His promise in these times of vulnerability and “nakedness.” By prayers, forgiveness and faith, my fiance and I held on to our commitment as an act of honoring God, His unwavering love and His faithfulness.

It is in this relationship that I was brought closer to God. It is in this relationship that I sought Him with all my heart. And it is in this relationship that I was more in tune with the Spirit, the bible verses became more meaningful to me and I can apply what I am learning from the Scripture. It was thru his mom that I got my first ever Our Daily Bread devotional which feeds my spiritual hunger daily and it is thru my fiance’s Dad that I got hold of the Spikenard Magdalena perfume which prompted me to read more about it learning more Godly wisdom in the process.

In short, it is in this relationship that I am learning more of God and His love every single breathing moment that I make each day.

It’s just that, I didn’t know – at first. And I used to have so little faith. 😉

“For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:9

Day 2: MORE REVELATIONS (Part 2)

Posted on July 1, 2015 by Christine Lailani

I knew that I cannot sleep this day off without sharing what happened tonight. For I believe they are all part of God’s revelations.

But first, I’d like to praise God for blessing us with spiritual leaders who took the responsibility of making sure we were all led “home” – in spiritual victory. 🙂

Last night’s prayer meeting at Victory QC in Regis Katipunan, Bishop Manny Carlos said that there will be tangible assurances from the Lord of His presence during this Mid-Year Prayer and Fasting. And this article will be a testimony of that prophecy. For I claimed it and believed in it. 🙂

6pm is the time I lift my “cellphone off” ban and I prepare for our 7pm prayer meeting. Last night, hailing a cab going to church and my travel time were easy. But tonight, it was a challenge. I got out of the house and saw that heavy traffic started to build up in front of our house. I waited for 15 minutes but no cab was available. I haven’t eaten for the rest of the day and I thought, this might be the enemy trying to prevent me from attending the prayer meeting.

Unfortunately I am not just a warrior but a conqueror. For God trained us to be that, right? 😉

So I walked one block to get to an intersection hoping I will have more chances of hailing an empty cab but then again to no avail until I have decided to ride a tricycle going to a nearby mall. Taxi stands are everywhere there. When I got to the mall, oh boy, one taxi stand has a long line of passengers waiting. So I went to the other side of the mall where there are lesser passengers waiting. A lot of empty cabs stopped in front of me but when I told them where I am headed to, they declined.

I am on the verge of quitting out of desperation. But no, I am determined. For I would always keep in mind that the only time I will not be in church is when I am dying and I am physically incapable to move. Yes, never say never. And sometimes, just like in the movie God’s Not Dead wherein the two ministers are having a hard time finding the right car for their vacation, faith is all that God was asking.

So yes, I thought why should I worry, God is in control now. Let things be and keep calm. If it is His will for you to be there in church, He will take you there in His perfect time.

Finally, a cab passed by, passengers got off and one passenger waited until I got in before closing the door. I thanked him and I thought, “Father, this must be it.” I mean let’s admit it, there are only a few gentlemen who are willing to open doors for the ladies now. But I am praying God will change that. 😀

Anyway, I got inside the cab, told the driver I am headed to Katipunan, he said yes and finally I felt relieved. But then it was cut short – Xavierville Ave was in such heavy traffic I thought I will arrive when the prayer meeting is already over. But c’mon Tin, never say never. Never ever give up on God, keep your hopes up.

So there I was at the back seat trying to keep myself mentally afloat and physically present yet spiritually in control. Then came the first of the revelations. Something caught my eye from the passenger’s seat door near where I am seated. Wow, Father. Is this you? 😉

Brian Joseph Taxi

Of all names, of all taxis, of all times, of all dates, must I ride a cab that has a name exactly like that of my ex fiance except that you just have to interchange it – his full name is Joseph Brian Rome.

Now I sure did laugh. I am not sure if the taxi driver heard it but I took a photo of it for documentation purposes. Well, all I ever said was a prayer in my head that “Father, if this came from you, I already am relying on You COMPLETELY.”

I am letting go of the things that You wanted me to let go and yet if this is the assurance You are giving me that losing someone to God is never really a loss then again I can only and will only HOPE in YOU.

Okay, so there went my conversation with God. But then, came this music from the taxi’s radio. And guess what that song was? It’s our love theme song – All of You Loves All of Me by John Legend. So below is a short video clip I took with the cab’s name. I cannot capture it long enough lest the driver might be distracted by my phone’s camera flash.

And so I laughed again and silently said, “Oh c’mon now Father God, you know that I love you and I can ONLY love you for you are my EVERYTHING.” And seriously though I thought, if the enemy is playing with my thoughts then I’ll show him who God really is.

I was about to record another video but when I looked up, I happen to stare at one of the food cart franchises by The Filipino Dream (formerly Filtrepreneur Franchise, Inc.) that my ex bf and I ventured on – Kambal Pandesal from San Miguel Mills Incorporated. And I thought, okay, now this is getting serious. Because I really thought the business was going to fail and it is not God’s will for us but I still prayed for it. This was a sign that God is giving me hope and to just wait a little more. So I took a photo of it while we were on standby mode.

Kambal Pandesal by San Miguel Mills Incorporated

But then, here came another surprise. The song that followed John Legend’s song was One of Us by Joan Osborne. Are you familiar with the lyrics? If not, here is a sample and of course I took a video of it.

“If God had a name what would it be?
And would you call it to his face?
If you were faced with Him in all His glory
What would you ask if you had just one question?

And yeah, yeah, God is great
Yeah, yeah, God is good
And yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah

What if God was one of us?
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Tryin’ to make his way home?”

Whew! I am all smiles before I even get to the prayer meeting. Yes, I was 20 minutes late but I believe God intended I get stuck in traffic so I’d have time to observe things around me and appreciate that really, IT IS ALL ABOUT GOD. 🙂

So came the prayer meeting, we prayed for our campus missionaries and ministries and it was not a coincidence my prayer group that I randomly joined in happen to be ALL educators who are taking up their graduate study. Yes, exactly just like me. And we were praying for the students in the campuses. Yes, sometimes smiling because of these wonders around you is all that you can do. 😀

After the prayer meeting I waited and hailed a cab and when I got in, I checked my phone. 2 missed calls from my ex bf and a txt msg. I read the txt msg first and wow, this was what I read:

Praying for this business venture.

The business deal was successful, we were able to help a future business partner put up their own food cart business and I was blessed too on the other hand. Praise be to God! Now this, I must say, I am already proclaiming with my utmost entity that my God is indeed the everlasting, magnificent God who saves, protects, loves and provides. I still will continue praying though that by God’s leading and grace, this will be successful. I am committing to the Lord’s plans in this venture.

Oh Father, I want to shout your name aloud right now to praise and honor You for Your Glory. But it is a full moon, I won’t do it lest I might be accused of being a lunatic. In Your perfect time and place though. 😛

So I texted my ex fiance as he is my business partner – a reason for us to talk in a casual, friendly manner. But in case he asks me to take him back and start again, I am afraid my heart is not yet ready for it. I have forgiven him but the time is not yet right to re-commit with him. I am not closing my doors though. I am just happy things were going well this time now that I have decided to give my all to God and to Him alone. 🙂

When I was about to get off the cab, I looked at the cab’s fare counter and it was 78.90. I have no smaller bills so I thought I’d just give my 500-peso bill and ask for a 400-peso change. Yup, I usually round it off (sometimes a little too high) when I pay my fare. Sort of helping them too from the extra.

But this time, the cab driver told me he doesn’t have enough money for my change as he only has 300 pesos at the moment for he just started taking passengers tonight.

So there goes me rummaging my bag for smaller bills to pay the exact amount and was glad to find 70 pesos. But I am still 8.90 short. I told the driver, “Manong 70 pesos lang po ang barya ko. Okay lang po ba?”

He didn’t hesitate and just easily answered with an “Ay okay lang po ‘yan Ma’am.” And I just thanked Him and thanked God for meeting a good soul back there. 😉

Oh what a night of my second day of prayer and fasting. I will eat my first and last meal of the day and pray to God for more of Him tomorrow, last day of the prayer and fasting, before I hit the hay.

But one thing I can promise, if these were distractions (for tonight’s prayer meeting focused on discerning distractions), then definitely the enemy failed. For I have already made a re-commitment to my Lord and my Savior – way solid this time. I will continue praying that God will unveil my eyes from any deception and lies placed before me by the enemy and lead me towards the Truth.

Goodnight for now my sisters and brothers! 🙂

	Christine Lailani on Why I Am Keeping This Blog AI-…
	Akhtar Munir on Why I Am Keeping This Blog AI-…
	Free KetoDietRecipes… on Home Cooking Made Even Better
	legendsfeedback1233 on Home Cooking Made Even Better
	Christine Lailani on Brief Encounters, Souls Intert…
	MERCY on Brief Encounters, Souls Intert…
	gold ira reviews on 1208611_4979879545525_10205000…
	company website on 8 Signs You’re A Literat…

Share this:

Share this:

Do Souls Really Linger in this World?

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this: