Tag Archives: life

Sentimental: Who Am I?

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I am down with my usual migraine attack (on its 5th day now), but this time accompanied by a high fever and eczema too. Whew! It’s kind of difficult to manage everything when every illness you have bolted in altogether. Though I took medicines yesterday, my husband (a nurse) and the doctor at the university infirmary advised me to take 3-5 days of bed rest for my follow-up check-up on Monday, and limit physical activity. While in bed, I thought about writing something.

Speaking of my husband, though, I appreciate him for his nonchalance. That is one thing I wanted to learn from him – how to maintain a worry-free attitude despite the disarray or when things have gone awry. I am, on the other hand, the exact opposite – I worry about everything! 😀 But through time, I have learned to control my worries, and I’ll share how in the succeeding paragraphs.

Dealing With Life’s Atrocities

I know there came in your life wherein you have never felt good enough – as a spouse, as a child, as a parent, as a student, as an employee, as a friend, as a relative, and ultimately as a person.

As a Christian teacher, I have learned that it is even more important to speak life than to criticize students. We might never know; we are already crushing the dreams of a young spirit because of the negativity. Though trials produce resiliency, positive reinforcement is still best. The world is already complicated enough, mainly because we, humans, made it that way.

Every person is different. It’s the same as how every seed grows to be a different plant. Every plant has its own tender and loving care requirements. Yet all plants need sunshine; they all need light.

The Breaking And The Making

When I was a grade school student, I had my first taste of disappointment when I didn’t win as president of the student council, and I was reprimanded during the campaign period along with the rest of my running mates. The offense? We were late in Math class for just a few minutes, and we weren’t allowed to enter the classroom. I took it as my responsibility to take the blame, being the running President, and seeing your peers crying out of shame was enough to break your heart to pieces.

When I was in high school, I had another major disappointment when I only graduated as “special mention” in class after consistently being on the top 3 honors list from 1st year until 3rd year, but failed to meet the criteria for the extracurricular activities, which comprised a huge percentage of the final grades. One of my high school best friends suffered the same fate. We were advised by our parents to never receive the award during the graduation ceremony, though our names were called because they said that we do not deserve it, but we were present during said ceremony.

When I was in college, I wasn’t able to finish my thesis on time because the adviser from our concentration was on sabbatical leave. We were assigned instead to another adviser from another concentration. After submitting my first draft, I got it back only to see red marks written everywhere, and the one thing that was retained in me was this comment: “How did you reach this far if you don’t know how to make a research paper? This is not the work of a UP student!”

I thought, maybe I should also ask my former professors why they passed me in all my other subjects if I am undeserving to be in UP. 😀 Little did I know that there were several of us who got the same remarks. Yep, in our university, you’ll encounter all sorts of professors, but when it comes to critical feedback, I understood it all as part of doing their jobs as teachers.

Then I worked, a dream job it was. But disappointment once again came. The mission and vision of the workplace weren’t met because one of the figures of authority behaved otherwise. I was the recipient of that very unprofessional behavior, and many have seen it. It happened a couple of times, too. I stayed and chose to keep quiet. But after praying about it, I had to let the job go.

God’s Path Towards Salvation

So these were all hang-ups of the past, which I am sure most of us have experienced one way or the other. Others may have gone through even worse than all these, and if given the chance, they are very much entitled to unleash their grievances as much as they want. But unfortunately, as much as we would like to shake them off, they are already embedded in who we are.

All those years, I have struggled with the need to impress, to seriously meet expectations, to be perfect, to excel always, and to prove myself to people. I suffered from anger and resentment boiling in me, and the need to take revenge and retaliate was so strong. I blamed life for bringing me people who did nothing but criticize me for my weaknesses, and only that, and went beyond in criticizing who I am personally, without even the slightest hint of who I really am and what I can do. This resentment and anger included some issues in other areas of my life, too, which I will not share due to their sensitivity. I really thought I was the unluckiest person alive back then.

For 27 years, I have battled with insecurity, the by-product of low self-esteem, poor self-image, and self-worth – the mentality that “I am never good enough.” Failures, wrong decisions, and disappointments became the stronghold that corrupted my entire being until it led me to a major depression – the breaking point, as they say.

Depression robs you of the beauty of life. It makes life look bleak, bland, and distorted. It affects your every decision, and it just kills life itself. Before I was born again in 2013, I committed suicide twice – both were failed attempts.

No, I do not easily give up. I did arrive at that breaking point on the verge of quitting everything, but I still fought hard against it.

I had two options: let the darkness corrupt me and become those people who plagued others or themselves with it OR choose to search for the light, the hope.

Knowing The Savior

The opportunity came for the latter – I was given HOPE.

The greatest moment of my life was when I was born again through my faith. Why? It’s because when I found out who I was in Christ, that was the greatest and the best thing that I have heard about myself for 27 years.

It was on that day when I surrendered myself to Christ that ALL chains got loose – I was set FREE.

The moment has already come for me to look at things from a very different perspective – a total paradigm shift. It wasn’t everything I hoped for, BUT it’s exactly what I NEEDED which no one else could give me except God.

This HOPE taught me even more than what I have learned in the academe or even from life itself. It taught me how to patiently wait for the right opportunities and how to patiently endure every setback. It taught me that there is a time for everything. It taught me to decline job offers and business opportunities that could’ve made me rich in wealth and possessions. It taught me to pass up on chances of earning titles that would’ve given me some sort of self-entitlement and self-fulfillment. It taught me to weigh options, sacrifice if I must. All of these, if they will, in the end, forfeit my soul.

It taught me to choose God’s will over mine. It taught me to rely on God’s plans rather than rely on my own understanding of the circumstances around me. It taught me to relinquish control and allow God to take over. It taught me that GRACE is a gift freely given, even if undeserving. It taught me how to love others even when they do not deserve it. It taught me to find joy, peace, and contentment even when darkness, chaos, and bitterness are all around. It taught me how to let go of the past and forgive.

It taught me what true humility is all about. It taught me to be grateful always. It taught me that simplicity matters most in life. It taught me to look outwardly and consider what others are going through as well. It taught me that if there is a void that the atrocities of life have caused in me, either by wrong choices or by fate, no one and nothing else can fill it up except God.

I found this hope in Christ alone, and I find strength in the Word every day, which is my guide in this life – not any textbook, novel, or company brochure.

“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” – Hebrews 11:1

Faith Anchored To Our Souls

Faith did not make my life free from criticism, condemnation, trials, and suffering. Yet it gave me a way to view life beyond that – salvation in eternity.

I still find myself in situations I have stated in the first part of this article. But this time, I have learned to see these instances from a different standpoint. I have learned to understand first where some people are coming from and why they are that way. I have learned to understand that maybe they are still in the darkness, too, driven perhaps by the need to compete, to be the best, and to meet expectations, dealing with their own insecurities and personal struggles, too. Or they have this false motive to instill in those who are next in line exactly what they went through, because in this “dog-eat-dog” world, repaying evil with evil is normal. Only God knows everything. What I observed, though, is that when people prick each other to bleed, it’s better to choose to be the rose among the thorns – the salt and light. 🙂

There are times the past comes all rushing back; it haunts. Another disappointment will ruffle your feathers. The need to lash out and punish calls. But I choose LIFE. I will speak LIFE.

Because Christ has given me LIFE. He, alone, gave me LIGHT. It is my duty as His follower to use that light so others can walk in and with Him, too, despite the darkness around them.

Ah, yes. Them.

One day, they will be brought out in the light, too. They will break standards, cultural traditions, and not conform to this world wherever they may be and whatever they may be doing. They will choose to fight for faith and spread light when hope seems dim. That was the reason I was smiling because I was praying for them silently, and I am claiming it all in the Mighty Name of Jesus, who made it possible for me, too. 🙂

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth, you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33

P.S.

It’s been 3 years now since I got saved, and when things don’t go the way I’ve expected them to be, I have this bookmark to remind me of who I am. I thank the sister in Christ who gave this when she facilitated a talk during my baptism of the Holy Spirit. I have carried it with me since then. The last verse listed is my life verse. 🙂

What matters is who I am in Christ. 🙂

Oh, and yes, one new thing I have learned too from our couples’ bible study Vgroup 2 Sundays ago (thanks Tito Tony and Tita Len for the wisdom) – the boiling water concept. If you put eggs in boiling water, they become hard. But if you put the potato in it, it becomes soft. I choose to be a potato – a couch potato. Kidding. *wink*

Seriously, it only means that when life and circumstances knock you down, don’t bear any grudge and don’t be hard on yourself and on others. Instead, let it soften you, let it refine you, and let it make you better. Be a better potato, I mean, a better man/woman. 😉

Last but not least, reach out to God, and then God will send His people (spiritual family) to help usher you out of the ordeal. I am praying for your struggles, too, my dear reader and brother/sister in Christ. If you also need to share a tough ordeal and are in need of a prayer intercession, you may always pop me an email. ❤

If Fred Flintstone Is Here…

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I have long been an advocate of protecting Mother Earth. I grew up surrounded by nature in its luscious state. Nope, please don’t get me wrong. I am no Tarzan nor Jane. *wink*

I just happen to grow up in a humble home (our ancestral home in the province) with a garden containing all sorts of flora and fauna courtesy of Mom and her best helper, Dad. Yup, he is the one in charge of the upkeep of the lawn with the lawn mower – it’s a guy thing. 😀

That is their quality time together as husband and wife on a weekend – tending the garden. The children are the ones in charge of picking the flowers for their own agenda and end up being scolded by Mom. lol

Okay so I am pro nature. Does that make me an anti urbanization? I have my own praises when it comes to industrialization. It is, I believe, in God’s plan that man will benefit from his own toil and hard labor resulting in a convenient life. Imagine Fred Flintstone and the difficulties of Stone Age and the primitive days. I am grateful I am not living in a cave and have to deal with bats and snakes or any squishy, wiggling, crawling, flying, spurting creature every night when I sleep.

But are we maintaining the balance? I was wondering what would Fred Flintstone say if he is with us and sees all the modernity around. I think the time has come for our industrial engineers, landscape architects and land developers to consider creating a change in this rapid momentum of skyscrapers being built everywhere especially in the city.

I see it as an idol, a temple. Not of God’s but of something else. It destroys what God has originally built. I no longer see God in those buildings, nothing God-made was retained.

I believe it is man’s obligation to maintain and preserve what God has built. We have been given free will which gave us opportunity to gain knowledge. Knowledge gave way to innovations. Innovations made life easier. BUT too much of it will destroy the very core of life in this world – Earth. Unless of course those innovations are nature-friendly.

If not, there really is indeed a possibility Earth will be nothing more but a rubble in the future and we’ll be living in spaceships. Ever watched the movie Transcendence? It’s basically the same.

I love Science. I enjoyed watching Sci-fi movies. My Mom was my grade school Science teacher and I was usually the one representing our school in Science quiz bees and competitions. I had that thirst for worldly knowledge back then and I grew up being inquisitive of everything around me.

I started asking the “why”  questions which later on I found out that Science has no answers for all of them. Too many unanswered questions brought me to questioning the reason even for my very own existence.

Good thing there was faith – I was saved from the disillusioned self. Now everything has meaning, everything has an answer, everything has a purpose. That made me understand not just my part but how each living and non-living thing created by God are interrelated.

This now brings us to innovations. Are they really supposed to be part of the picture?

I have been sharing on Instagram those that are all natural or which pertain to nature. I saw the beauty of them that transcends beyond the skyscrapers and high-rise buildings that speak nothing else but of man’s creations.

This made me ask again. Is man trying to outwit, outplay and outlast God?

If we are to compete with God in the Survivor game show, there’s no doubt we’d be eliminated first. Can God create buildings? Of course, He can. So why didn’t He create skyscrapers and a whole lot of them for His creations to live in alongside Earth when He created everything?

Too much is detrimental. It speaks of greed – hunger for power and to acquire more than what is necessary.

I have no control over the industrialization age. But I can help the younger generation appreciate what could be the last remnants of God’s creation at its best and original state – nature. I am hoping the younger and future industrialists, architects and engineers will take it to themselves to preserve what is left of God’s creation.

If they wouldn’t make the change then there’s nothing left for our great grandchildren and the children after them to marvel at when it comes to showing them how God created the world. Garden of Eden for them will just be a far-fetched concept or worse, a myth.

And yes, they will be missing out so much. *sigh*

And yes too, this is the first time I am ending my article with a sigh. BUT with a smile – still hopeful. ☺

P.S.

My Dad, by the way, is a retired civil engineer. He builds bridges and dams and facilitates in the irrigation of rice fields with the National Irrigation Administration. He did these not to destroy nature but to help in nourishing it so nature in return can help the farmers make good use of the resources.

If only man would learn to settle with contentment.

*sighs again*

*smiles again*

“A psalm of David. The Earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it. The world and all its people belong to Him.” – Psalm 24:1

Mid Year Prayer and Fasting 2016: July is Enthusiasm

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JulyEnthusiasm

For this year’s mid year prayer and fasting in our Victory church, it fell on the month of July same as the Muslim’s end of “Ramadan” and my Paulo Coehlo planner has “enthusiasm”  as the BIG word for this month. I intended to lessen my social media interaction during this period to lessen distractions and temptations. Compared to my previous testimonies during prayer and fasting which were day by day accounts, I thought about summarizing experiences for this mid year’s prayer and fasting.

Fasting, for me, actually happens every single day. Fasting is denying yourself the desires of your heart which is most oftentimes can be associated to worldly pleasures to be more in tune with the Spirit. In other words, fasting means having self-control and discipline. My definition of self-control means controlling my desire to get any opportunity to try all great food out there in big volumes (gluttony); controlling my desire to get all the new gadgets in the market and other material possessions (greed); controlling my desire to avail all cosmetics, plastic surgery or other beauty enhancements (vanity); controlling myself in acquiring every opportunity to earn titles and be well accomplished in terms of business, career or in academics (pride) and a whole lot more of desires that need to be controlled.

The prayer and fasting that our church has which takes place during the mid year and the start of the year are ways for me to present to God the even bigger “giants”  that I need to overcome not just for myself but for those around me too. These “giants”  could be prayer requests that have not yet been answered and yet proved to be quite burdensome and the circumstances that I have no control over. Thus, I make sure my testimony for the prayer and fasting will be documented and here it is. 🙂

Let’s start with Day 1 (Faith to Speak).

True enough to the word “enthusiasm,”  day 1 has a BIG revelation already. Before I even started my devotion for day 1, I already received a text message, a follow up about something I am sincerely praying for over familial matters. It was followed by a prayer from me and I cried upon seeing it because it only meant one thing: God answered my prayers just to give us hope although more prayers are needed and yet the assurance that He is with us in this ordeal that we are going through is more than enough. It brought back memories of me 3 years back before I got saved and what I also went through. Then, the bell of a nearby church rang, it signified the holy hour of the day – 12 noon. Ahhh yes, the LOVE OF GOD manifests everywhere. 🙂

I shared to my hubby what happened and he told me that I really am dedicated in doing things that are not even required of me. I told him that yes, I am doing it out of love – sharing the love that God gave me. If it wasn’t for Him, I wouldn’t be where I am now. It is the love of God that saved me from the repercussions of my sin and past mistakes and eventually saved me from death – salvation through the Cross.

“For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus, our Lord.” – Romans 6:23

I continued that I am able to share this love that God has given me to others because I know how it felt to be on the losing end, alone, empty, afraid and unsure of everything because of the total darkness around me and yet God gave me hope, He gave me peace and lastly, He gave me security. All because He loves me. True it is when the bible said that,

“We love because He loved us first.” – 1 John 4:19

I want to share this love to others so that they, too, might know who God is and how it feels to be saved by GRACE out of His undying FORGIVENESS and faithful LOVE to us.

It was in this moment that I realized what my brother told me that I was selected for the task, for this mission, being the one who has a flexible schedule because of my masteral thesis and I have no work. So my prayer went like this as I ended my prayer and fasting devotion for day 1:

“Dear Father,

Though I may shed tears as I humbly pray to you now, it is because I am  overwhelmed by Your presence that I am feeling now. You have, once again, through miracles, shown Yourself and how great Your love is for us. You never left me and my family. Through the times that we have to cope with grief, loss, pain and suffering, You gave us patience, courage and strength to endure it all. This goes out to other nations as well and their people who are going through the same thing.

This prayer is not a prayer of requests but of gratitude. I have made my heart known to You and all the needs and the burden that I have to carry and yet I find myself at peace every single day, not worrying about anything (which is unusual) and enjoying a content moment with my spouse. We are savoring these simple but precious moments that we are experiencing now and we never fail to thank You of that every day as we come before You and pray.

Indeed, You are my footprints in the sand, the only footprint visible because You carried me all the way. Thank You for the protection, for shielding us from the attacks of the enemy to steal, kill and destroy, for guiding us in our decisions, for instructing us what to do and showering us with the warmth of Your love.

I know, Father, that You have prepared me and prepared all of us in every circumstance and in every season that we will go through in this life. Thank You, lastly but not the least, for sending to us the Spirit who will remind us, guide us, intervene for us and lead our every moment in our lives. We know that You are preparing us for the second coming of our Savior.

I am lifting up Your Name as I continue to trust in You and claim the beautiful promises that You set before us in every battle that we will go through in this world. We are all victoriously saved through the One and Only Son whom You sent to save us from the perils of this world and take away all our pain, sorrow and suffering once and for all. 

I love others because of You and because I LOVE YOU…I am EXTREMELY GLAD and GRATEFUL that I have come to know You and I will FOLLOW and OBEY what You command me to do through the Mighty Name of Your Son, JESUS,

AMEN.

Your loving daughter,

Tin”

Then, heavy rain poured (I love rain). Was it Your assurance God that You heard me? I bet it is. *insert enthusiasm here*  😀

On with Day 2 (Faith to Fight).

Because miracles do happen, I believe this testimony will attest to that – MORE GOOD NEWS! Though I cannot share the specifics for confidentiality purposes, I know my Father God sees it all and the enthusiasm I have for Him and all His goodness. Ah Lord, You are our Great Healer and Deliverer indeed. Thank You for all You have done. 🙂

This verse indeed came to life for me:

“The Lord will fight for you, and you only have to be silent.” Exodus 14:14

Without even thinking who to encourage as part of the “Respond”  activity for today’s devotion, God already gave the opportunity who I should encourage when it comes to faith. I only realized it some time after I sent the message to these people – God gave the need.

Today was all about fighting for faith and the enemy will never give up without a fight too, will he? I committed to a no-rice, smaller intake of meals fasting being a heavy rice-eater. Oh boy, my neighbor now started cooking deliciously-smelling viands and the aroma is just filling the entire house and I can hear my stomach grumbling its complaints. 😀

Then there went my internet connection unusually going off for some time, which rarely happens, exactly when I am about to share about faith in my social media accounts. Well, the enemy can try but he has found the greatest adversary ever in me – God. Try as he might, I am also determined to do what I was tasked. 🙂

I also had to go to the mall to buy some stuff and hubby and I decided to eat dinner at the mall’s food court. I ordered pita bread while he ordered 2-piece fried chicken with rice. I told my husband while eating, “Honey, you know how enviously you are making me feel with every spoonful you take with that rice.”

He laughed and offered me a piece of chicken skin (my favorite). Then I told him too, “You know that chicken skin too is sinfully delicious. It contains too much allergens and high in cholesterol, I should also avoid that.”

I went on that controlling my desires and avoiding temptations will make me happy because it will make my Father in Heaven happy too when He sees what I did. So now my hubby resolved to have a no-rice fasting too so he could empathize with me and not tempt me. 😀

Though I did not encourage him to do this because he needs all the energy he can get commuting every day to work for 2 hours in every trip and the demands at work. So I told him to eat just the way he would but just be with me in faith and in prayer. 🙂

My prayer for this day went like this:

“Father in Heaven,

You have, once again, tremendously shown that we need not worry and be anxious about everything for it is You who are fighting in our behalf. You have, once again, given opportunities to show how faithful You are to our needs. Indeed, I only need to be silent and let You do what You needed to do. 

I will never stop in fighting the good fight of faith to honor You and Your commandments. Though the enemy may strike everywhere and anytime, I have faith that You will give me the armor that I need to defeat him. 

May You continue to give me the strength and the courage to pursue in living what is good and what is right according to Your standards. I am inviting You in my every fight for faith through the Mighty Name of Your Son, Jesus, AMEN.

Lovingly Yours,

Tin”

Last but not the least, Day 3 (Faith to Overcome).

Today was also another beautiful day receiving a personal message from someone whom we have been praying for – a text of gratitude. It made me cry tears of joy, out of gratitude too. Darkness was overcome and there is now light, a resurrection, a redemption and a new beginning.

Ahh, we have such a loving God. If only more and more people could see it. If only more could experience it. 🙂

I believe the following statement from today’s prayer and fasting devotion will answer this:

“We must have faith to hear from God and do what He says, regardless of how unconventional or illogical the instructions may be.”

I know that faith is the only way to overcome every challenge, setback, trial and suffering – claim the victory that has already been made for us through what Jesus did on the Cross for us. We were already made victorious by His blood shed on the Cross – we just need to CLAIM it. Most probably why the word PROCLAIM. 🙂

We are to proclaim that Jesus has saved us and granted us victory over our sinful lives i.e. bad habits, past mistakes, wrong decisions, lust, greed, pride, wealth, possessions, etc. and over this sinful world i.e. death, crime, murder, sickness, corruption, etc. There is victory to those who believe that He has overcome the world once and for all and all we need to do is to live out this thought in every portion of our lives.

We have to proclaim that God, through His Son Jesus, is the ruler of our lives and the ruler of this world – ONLY Him. 🙂

“For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith.” – 1 John 5:4

So I’d like to end this article with this worship song that I encountered while having my worship time first day of the mid year prayer and fasting. Honestly, my worship time at home means jumping, dancing and singing out loud because I can’t do it in church lest my flailing arms might hit fellow worshipers. 😀

I was singing this at the top of my lungs and…..hubby just got LSS (last song syndrome)-ed by this song! hahaha He and I are humming and singing this song since then every time.

Well, this song reminds me of what true worship should be: the FAITH to SPEAK, the FAITH to FIGHT and the FAITH to OVERCOME….all with ENTHUSIASM. 😉

Thus, for my prayer, I have this:

“Dearest Father in Heaven,

Thank You for giving me two great partners in this world – the Spirit and my husband. 

Thank You for the Spirit who intervenes in all that I do and I thank You for my husband who shares in my every tear and my every laughter through the bad news and the good news, the failures and the triumphs.

We love You so much, Lord, for being with us ALL THE WAY. We are looking forward to claiming life in eternity with You and Your Son. With You nothing is impossible for You have overcome the world.

Thank You most of all for the overflowing love which gives me, in turn, overflowing happiness, peace and security. Thank You for giving me a reason to live life ENTHUSIASTICALLY.

In Jesus’ Mighty Name, AMEN.

Forever Yours,

Tin”

May everyone raise their hands to the sky and give God the praise, the glory and the honor that He deserves. ❤

And may God bless you, dear sister/brother, who is reading this. 🙂

Do You Have A War Room?

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For I certainly need one. 🙂

First, my apologies. I promised to write this after the “tugging” article and yet another article came before this and another one more.

God’s plan – additional relevant info came in along with the recent events which will be discussed at the latter part of this article.

So I thought it better there’d be a “war room”  in churches. If Muslims have a mosque, Catholics have a confessional, I believe born-again Christians should also have a “war room.”  We are all united by one God and we all serve one God. If I am not mistaken, we have been called as “The Prayer Nation” too.

This “war room”  will offer 3 options to believers whichever they are most inclined to do:

1. Pray in the war room alone if a quiet, personal time with God is needed and yet a war room is not available at home, at work or in school during the midweek.
2. Beside a war room there is a prayer box in case they felt the need for more members of the spiritual family to pray for them and yet do not have the courage to meet them personally.
3. Beside the prayer box is an instruction what to do and who to contact when a dire need is there to talk to a spiritual leader regarding a very urgent and pressing concern i.e. life and death, demonic possessions, safety, hopeless cases, etc.

I have envisioned “war rooms” placed in every city which would be similar to the garden that Jesus went to before the crucial moments of His arrest. I thought it better that every church in every city would build what I call a “A Place of Serenity” where it’ll give peace and solitude to those who desperately seek it.

I got this idea from Sagada in the Mountain Province in the northern part of the Philippines wherein it is flocked by visitors who needed to break away from their busy lives and busy environments and I personally call it as “The Prayer Mountains”  based from the experiences of friends who’ve had their “enlightenment”  there.

Unfortunately, it is a 6-hour drive from the metro – something that not everyone have the privilege to do on a regular basis. I thought why not create something like it within the metro but as compared to Jesus’ garden and Sagada, this place of serenity within the metro will be built adjusted accordingly to the demands of the city lifestyle – crowded, busy and noisy.

It could be a small parcel of land, turned into a garden i.e. landscaped and surrounded by trees and at the center will be a building or any structure that holds cubicles built in the same way as recording studios (sound proof) with nothing else inside it but a chair, a table, a pen, a paper and a bible.

Why these 5 things only?

First, God will give His instructions as prompted by the Spirit through the Holy Scripture. Second, a chair and a table are another option if one does not want to kneel while praying, there is a physical disability or an elderly. Lastly, a pen and a paper will be needed for documentation if one needs to write a specific bible verse that the Spirit has prompted or if there is a need to write down his/her prayer requests so more members of the spiritual family can pray over them. This can be dropped in a prayer box which I have mentioned in item 2 above.

This idea of a “war room”  came after watching none other than one of the best Christian films I have watched so far which is War Room: Prayer Is A Powerful Weapon.  It is also because I am in need of one being situated beside a very busy street and neighborhood wherein you hear all sort of sounds and noise any time of the day and night. Our living quarters too come in the form of a small apartment wherein there is use for every nook of the place that does not elicit solitude. So I wondered where would I go if I wanted to seek for serenity within the metro so I could hear God’s instructions clearly.

After our volunteer work at the home for the aged, one of the outreach coordinators asked us who would be willing to volunteer as intercessors to that “special ward”  which I referred in the article. Three of us volunteered and they are my church mates, my sisters in Christ and my former bible study group mates. I just thought I’d totally appreciate finding a place that I can call a “war room”  as being an intercessor would mean I need to have a more quiet and personal time with God so I could present all these prayer requests, be more in tune with the Spirit and discern His instructions – I have so many to pray for in every area of my life and in everything and everyone around me.

In case you haven’t watched the movie War Room: Prayer Is A Powerful Weapon yet, I highly encourage you to watch it for it’s message is just so powerful, it is so real and yet tells so much of the Truth. 🙂

He went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.” – Matthew 26:39 (The Prayer in the Garden, Jesus Prays in Gethsemane)

“But when you pray, go into your inner room, shut your door, and pray to your Father, who is unseen. And your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” – Matthew 6:6 (The Lord’s Prayer)

In case you have been called by the Spirit to intercede for someone or something, this article might help in preparing for the work:

http://www1.cbn.com/questions/what-is-intercessory-prayer

“Lord, we need an army of believers. Lord, call us to battle. Raise them up, Lord. Raise them up.”

The Christian From Bicol

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(This is an excerpt from this post I wrote back in November 2013 during Typhoon Yolanda. I thought this particular content deserves to have its own separate article with a different title this time.)

Wherever God would take me, whatever God would give me, I will bring with me two identities: first, I am a Christian, and second, I am a Bicolana.

I can never be prouder of anything I have and whoever I have become other than those two I have mentioned above.

Why a Christian? I am nothing and nobody without my God, first and foremost. My identity is in Him, and I believe I need not say more as it is what it already is. 🙂

Why a Bicolana then? Ahh, this is most likely where I’ll be explaining more.

I grew up in the province. I spent more than half of my life there. As of writing, that is. There’s no other place that I could ever call ‘home’ except Bulan. Yes, that is my hometown, a small town in the province of Sorsogon somewhere in the southernmost part of Luzon.

Sorsogon consists mostly of coastal areas surrounded by beaches of all sand colors from white, pink, to black –  you name it, we have it. Rich in natural resources, fishing and farming have been the sources of livelihood with almost all the Bulanons (that’s how we generally call ourselves).

Fishing

Fishing

If there is one value that being a Bicolana has taught me, it would be this – knowing your roots. In other words, learn to look back from your humble beginnings. Bulan is the one thing that has taught me how it is to be humble and to be grateful. Humility bespeaks when the heart is in awe of the mediocre. I know you are going to agree with me right there.

I came from a family of farmers. My parents, my grandparents, and the parents before them all came from humble beginnings. We wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for them. Gratitude is what I could offer to my ancestors for the sacrifices and hard work that they have invested in providing the best for their families.

I came from a generation wherein I didn’t have to go to the fields and do the farming myself, and go home with sweaty clothes covered in mud just to pay for all of my expenses and supply my needs. An experience I never had to go through, and yet something that I would want to go through.

CIRCA 1980s: My mom, aunts, uncles along with my grandparents.

CIRCA 1980s: My mom, aunts, uncles, and my grandparents.

They say that for someone to appreciate the value of something less than its market value and more of its sentimental value, you have to work hard for it and have it like how it is usually done and achieved. You have to sweat it out, so to speak.

I was listening to the podcast of Pastor Christian Flores regarding Victory’s new series entitled “It’s Not About The Money” two Sundays ago, and he mentioned the story of a farmer and how this farmer had invested his earnings in acquiring an even bigger barn where he could store more, which actually resulted in his own destruction.

That made me think about our farm, our farmers, and what we really get from it. For starters, our farmhouse did not change, though many years and decades have passed. We are earning just enough, and we are still living frugal lives, though we have acquired some possessions through time – still, I think it is not about the money. Money, for us, is something that has to do with survival, but never to accumulate great wealth and live grandiose, rich lives.

I might be speaking out of righteousness here, but if you will personally ask me, that is how I think it should be. I do not wish to dwell on this matter then and will just leave all the explaining to our Pastors as they lead us on with the series – a reason for you to stay tuned for our upcoming podcasts or better yet visit a nearby Victory church: http://victory.org.ph/. (Sorry for the shameless plugging, but I felt you would understand it better if the explaining would come from our church leaders).

victoryqc.org

victoryqc.org

This is the season of harvesting, and when I went home during the holidays last November 1 and 2, I chanced upon the last harvest in our farm. I have skin asthma, and as much as I should be staying away from hay, I know it would not stop me from going along with my Dad. I suffered the consequences later on – my cough got worse, and itchy rashes came out that lasted for about a week, leaving black spots on my skin, which then stayed on for about how many months.

The last time I was with my Dad during harvesting was when I was around 6 or 7 years old. I could still remember how our parents would ask us (not really me, as I was way too young, but my sisters and brother) to help in drying the “palay”  we had harvested so they could be sold to the millers for a good price before they then sell it to the market.

Yes, how could I really forget all the scurrying here and there, to and fro, when dark clouds come, and heavy rains start to pour. It only means sweeping the grains, piling and covering them up as FAST as you can to prevent them from getting wet, thus lowering the chances of getting a low price as “palay”  buyers measure the moisture content of the rice grains. The drier the grain is, the higher its market value.

Palay

Threshing of palay.

My Dad is not a farmer per se. He is a civil engineer who juggled two occupations at the same time – that of a farmer and a superintendent at the National Irrigation Administration in the Bicol region (officially at San Ramon, OIC in Masbate and Sorsogon City). He is now 74 years old, retired from his engineering career, and yet a continuing farmer. I have always admired my Dad, who, at his age, still manages to do what he would always do at the farm despite his arthritis, gout attacks, hypertension, cataract, and other illnesses of the aged. Although we don’t dry the harvested rice grains anymore to lessen the stress level of all the scurrying and hurrying, tending the farm is still a lot of busy work to do.

I went to the farm with my Dad not to harvest the grains myself and have them threshed out but witness how it is usually done. I have to get into the particulars as to how to do this and that. Well, I might consider farming as my job someday. Yes, “Tin”  the farm girl. *wink*  I think I heard my Kuya’s sarcastic chuckle back there again. Haha Yeah, right. And yes, I wanted to observe how our farmers do it – our trusted and loyal workers. I admired them more than I have admired an office employee (no offense to office-based workers). But hard labor is no easy job. Exposed in the heat of the sun, bending over for hours either planting rice seedlings or harvesting them, soaked in mud or inhaling the itchy hay dust when threshing are, for me, among the most challenging tasks.

I closely looked at all of them. I saw Tio Digoy and Tio Kadog – they are the oldest among all of them. They have been working for my Dad since I was a kid. Now, their sons are working for us as well. I have learned to love them for all that they have put up for me and my family. I am praying that through us, their sons, daughters and grandchildren will one day have a better future because of their parents and grandparents’ hard work. Though that means we might lose workers in our farms, it would also be equivalent to giving everyone the chance to have better lives than what they have now.

I am praying too that someday there will no longer be a need for manual labor and everything will be run by machines operated in a clean office from planting to harvesting rice. That goes as well for harvesting coconuts and converting them into copra. The team of Tio Digoy also does them for us. Skilled, they really are. My family and I will always be grateful to them. We will always be grateful to Him for any blessing that He has bestowed as well as for His guidance and protection not just to me and my family but to our skilled workers and their families as well.

Copra

Coconuts being made into copra.

So if most think this is what I do in Bicol:

http://us.123rf.com

http://us.123rf.com

Nope, that’s not it because this is what I usually do:

"Tin, The Farm Girl"

“Tin, The Farm Girl”

Quite the opposite, right? Well, aside from washing the dishes, cleaning the house, feeding the pets, etc. and having a little vacation time actually. We have no helpers or house maids back home and here in Manila, by the way. As it is written in the bible:

“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.” – Matthew 10:45

Let’s all live a life of servitude, shall we my dear brothers and sisters? 🙂

The Humble Praise

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image

Photo credit: chrisheinz.com

I praise thee God for this LOVE.

This love which I now share to others as an overflowing blessing of which You have showered upon me abundantly.

I praise thee God for this PEACE.

That subtle moment of contentment, unafraid, secured and free.

I praise thee God for this JOY.

Despite the darkness, the turmoil, the terror and the battles.

I praise thee God for this HOPE.

Our resting place in times of uncertainty and the way to start afresh every day.

I praise thee God for this LIFE.

Though it is temporary, we live it not for us but for You as we slowly trudge our way in the life everlasting.

I praise thee GOD for You are WORTHY of all the GLORY. ❤

#Goal

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Dahil kahit sira ang aking laptop, wala pa ring nakapigil sa akin na mag-sulat sa blog lalo na’t ilang araw na akong natengga sa pagsusulat ayan na’t puro drafts sila at kahit pa tinatyaga ko ang mabagal na pag-type nito sa aking phone. 😉

Madalas kong maalala ang nabasa ko sa libro ni Pr. Joey patungkol sa buhay mag-asawa sa libro nyang pinamagatang “The One Thing That Saved My Marriage.”  This was what he shared about remembering an incident where he learned that one lesson that changed their lives as a couple:

We were visiting a church in snow-covered Washington, DC. Though it happened in 1988, I can still remember the moment vividly in my mind. The pastor said, “At the end of your life, you will find yourself in a hospital bed somewhere and the people surrounding your bed will not be your business partners and associates; they will be your wife and children. The saddest day of your life is when you look into her eyes and both of you realize that you did not love her and your children the way you should have.”

Kung interesado kayong mabasa ito, married or not, you can download this sa website nya (joeybonifacio.com) and you just have to subscribe and look for the book in the e-books bar section.

Parang tulad din ng sinabi ni Pr. Dennis sa seminar on careers sa Singles’ Getaway noong 2012 kung saan ako nagkaroon ng altar call. This was about his wife noong ito ay nagbabalak i-pursue ang pagme-medisina para maging doktor at pinapili nya kung buhay may asawa o pagdo-doktor pipiliin nya. He told his wife na kaya ba syang damayan ng kanyang medical career sa mga gabing naiiyak o nalulungkot sya dahil sa isang problema. His wife chose to prioritize him and the family.

I met my husband nasa katapusan na ako ng masteral ko. Ngunit pinili kong unahin ang pag-aasawa thus we got married kahit ‘di ko pa tapos MA ko. Now I jokingly asked my husband, “Hon kung matapos ko MA ko and pursue my PhD, papayagan mo ba ako?”

He seriously answered/asked: “Wala ka na panahon ‘nun sa amin ng mga anak mo. May gusto ka bang patunayan sa sarili mo, Hon?”

And I was silent. Smiled. Then laughed. It was really a joke.

Oo, tama sya. Para saan pa nga ba ang pag-pursue of “greater” things when God wanted us to be content with what we have taking into consideration things that really matter – if you are married, it is your spouse and family. When we claim for greater things then it also means greater responsibilities which as we all know requires these – more time, more effort, and more resources. I guess we never really can have the best of both worlds thus we have to choose and prioritize. Ngunit sa mata ng Dios, what comes after Him if you are married is not your career but your spouse.

Tama sila Pastor na sa pagtanda mo o kapag ikaw ay naaksidente o nasa ospital, it is not going to be your co-workers, your friends or your boss who will be there to stay with you 24/7. Lahat ng iyong kaibigan ay magkakaroon din ng mga sarili nilang pamilya ganun din mga kapatid at kamaganak at ang mga ka-close mo sa trabaho ay magre-resign din ‘di kalaunan.

Though it is nice to get achievements, it will become of no use when you get home and you have nobody to share it with who is there with you cheering you all the way from start to finish. There is a possibility though that your spouse will leave this world sooner which would prove that indeed, things of this world are only temporary.

Yet this will prove too that because life is short and everything is temporary, it is a must we give the necessary kind of love to the significant other that God has appointed to us if it is our calling to be married.

Maybe the best question we should ask ourselves now is to whom or to what are we investing most of our time now here on Earth? Are we using it to forge meaningful relationships living out the greatest commandment of God which is loving someone with a Christ-like attitude and preparing for life in eternity or we are just living the life within this world and conforming to its patterns?

Isa sa mga goals ko ang mabuhay ng simple, working to live and not living to work. I need money for survival and yet I rely on God for the rest of my needs. If we are getting everything we need and want thru our own efforts then we would become lukewarm in our faith thinking we don’t need Him to supply our needs.

Now this is contrary to what God wants from us dahil ang gusto lang Nya is for us to seek Him with all our hearts. ‘Yun at ‘yun lang kung tutuusin ang only goal natin in this world dapat.

With this in mind, I contemplated about not finishing my masteral. I prayed real hard about it and got an instruction from God to finish it in His perfect time. Plano kong mag-shift ng courses noong college at itong Special Education na course sana lilipatan ko. But I was advised na ituloy ko na lang undergraduate course ko and i-pursue na lang as master’s degree ang Special Education kung plano ko mag-aral ulit.

Matagal na panahon na ang lumipas pero hindi pa rin ako makausad sa masteral thesis ko to the point na tinanong na ako ng Kuya ko kung ito ba talaga gusto ko. Sabi ko oo, dahil gusto ko tumulong sa mga batang may kapansanan o special needs. Nararamdaman ko na dun malapit ang puso ko. Kung ‘yun daw ang purpose ko ‘di na kailangan ng master’s degree dahil marami namang paraan para tulungan sila.

Sagot ko naman hindi lang kasi ‘yun. Plano ko magtayo ng isang Special Education school at magiging maganda credibility ng school na ito kung alam ng mga magulang na ang may-ari ng school ay may alam sa Special Education. Plano ko rin maging hands on sa school na ito kaya dapat may alam ako sa Special Education, training at experience nang sa gayon masubaybayan at magabayan ko rin ang mga SpEd teachers na magtuturo sa aking school.

At hindi lang dito nagtatapos ang layunin ko dahil kasabay ng school ay plano ko magtayo ng isang foundation/therapy center na mangangalaga ng libre sa mga batang may kapansanan ngunit kapos para makakuha ng sapat na serbisyo sa kanilang mga needs doon muna sa aking hometown sa Bulan, Sorsogon sa Bicol region. Alam ko na sa mga plano na ito, malaking effort, mahabang panahon at malaking pondo kailangan kong bunuin.

Ito ay isa lamang sa mga long-term goals ko kahit pa ngayong ako’y may asawa na. At palagay ko magpapatuloy ito hanggang sa pagtanda ko. Alam ko malapit ang puso ng Dios sa mga bata at alam ko rin na ang Special Education ay isa sa mga paraan ng Dios para matulungan ang mga batang nabuhay ng may kapansanan. I know the Lord sees the challenges, the frustration and the pain that these kids, who are innocent, go through pati ng mga magulang nila. Ngunit sa kabila ng lahat ng ito, ito rin naging reminder ko:

“Many are the plans of man, but it is the Lord’s purpose that will prevail. (Proverbs 19:21)”

Sa ngayon patuloy akong nananalangin for the Lord’s instructions, guidance and provision. And yet I have faith na saan man ako dalhin ng Dios kahit pa sobrang kabaligtaran sa mga plano at pinapangarap ko ang mangyari, buo tiwala ko na it is for my own good at ‘di lang para sa akin, kundi para na rin sa asawa ko at sa mga magiging anak namin. Nagtitiwala ako na hindi man matupad itong pangarap ko in my lifetime, I have hope na nariyan ang opportunity na ang magiging anak ko ang posibleng mag-sakatuparan at tumupad ng mga pangarap na ito kung ito ay alinsunod sa will ng Panginoon at kung ito rin ang kanyang calling o misyon.

Sa ngayon, binigay sa akin ng Dios ang asawa ko. This means that whatever happens, sya ang pangalawa sa priority ko after ni God.

Ikaw kapatid, anong mga plano mo sa buhay ang inaalay mo sa Dios na bigyan ka ng gabay? Continue praying, God hears and answers. 🙂

“And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” – Romans 8:28

The Battle Cry

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There was once a moment when he asked me:

“Why am I experiencing all these failures and disappointments?”

“If there is a God, then He should not allow me to suffer but how come He won’t listen to my prayers?”

 And my answer was simple:

“There is a God, He listens to you and He answers. BUT you just don’t hear it because you don’t believe.”

And I continued:

“Didn’t you know that this world that we live in now is the devil’s domain?

Didn’t you know that most of the problems that we encounter are all fueled by the dark forces and the evil nature that reside in this world?

Didn’t you know that this world is condemned, it is temporary and this was cursed because of our fallen nature, that moment when Adam and Eve (our ancestors) were banished from the garden of Eden because of sin?

BUT…

Didn’t you know too that God has made peace with us by sending His Son as the ultimate sacrifice so we can choose to have life?

Didn’t you know that that life is not the life lived in this world, but lived in a world where everything is pleasing, good and perfect and everything evil, the ones that we are experiencing now, will forever be eradicated including death?

Didn’t you know that this other world is called heaven, a place of eternity and eternal salvation in contrast to hell which is eternal condemnation?

Didn’t you know that what God only wanted for us is to accept His gift to us which is eternal salvation through His Son Jesus Christ?

Didn’t you know that this salvation means God wants to save us from the dark forces of evil in this world by giving us a chance to claim victory towards life in eternity?

Didn’t you know that God wanted to prove to you that He is more powerful than anything in this world and that He is the only one who can save you from the perils of this world just by simply surrendering to the Way towards salvation, surrendering to the Truth that death has no power over the Son of God, and surrendering to the Life that is eternal and infinite – Jesus Christ?

Didn’t you know that it only takes three ways to believe in God, our ticket towards heaven – to repent, to surrender and to proclaim you need a Savior?”

And so I continued:

“If you don’t really know all these things, then I humbly dare you to ask God to come into your life, reveal Himself to you and prove that He is indeed God of all.”

This was how I ended the battle for I believe God will finish it for me. All I have to do is believe then proclaim – this is my battle cry. 

Courage: The Brighter Side

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If there is one thing that faith, the church, our family and the spiritual family all point to, that would be to look at the brighter side of things. 🙂

The first few months of this year have been a struggle for me and my husband which includes everything about life in general i.e. careers, aspirations, adjustments, financial breakthroughs, settling differences, goals, etc. More trials turned up for the month of March which drove me to devote full time to gospel reading, bible study devotion and quiet times.

There were a lot of times that I asked God for guidance, courage and strength to withstand them all as there are times more often too that I felt like everything is a mess, in chaos, uncertain of what the future holds, and all I ever did/was doing was a mistake. Little did I know that God has everything planned out for me already – all I have to do is to be still.

In times of extreme trials, it is the Word that I turn to and it is prayers that held me through. I tried to find snippets of things that would give me hope and I just smiled when I realized how could I be so blind or how could I let my problems blind me from the Truth.

How could I not trust God at all? How could I speak so much about my faith when I can’t even rely on God’s power and greatness which rule this world and beyond?

Yes, as I have said in my previous articles, when it comes to faith you really have to make an affirmation each and every single day. Life is all about God, faith, and nothing else. As my brother would always tell me, “Life has always been a battle of faith.”

Speaking of my brother, God used him as the instrument for me to know what faith is all about, introduced me to a spiritual family which then helped me get out of the pit I was in and finally led me to my salvation. As our church leaders would instruct us, salvation is just the start of your spiritual journey. As much as you have been renewed, being a born again Christian does not exempt you from the perils and sorrows of this world – faith has only made you and your life storm-proof.

It was all God’s plans. As you begin to understand that every single day of your life comprises the millions of routes in God’s blueprints will you realize that it was God who brought you where you are now. But because most of the time our human selves do not have the capacity to explain our circumstances, we rely on them as what they seem to be.

Yet being the all-knowing God, He knows that too. This is probably the reason why He has already prepared us and what we will be needing through the next course of our lives here in this world. Going back to my brother, he and my sister-in-law have been the constant givers of my Paulo Coehlo planner since 2013, the year I got saved, as a Christmas gift – something that I am always grateful for.

Not that I am advertising but I believe God has aligned it to be this way – why I should get hold of this certain planner. This planner, aside from this blog, holds my day-to-day scribbling in my spiritual walk. It contains the verses of the day, my bible study devotion, my Our Daily Bread quotation, my prayer requests, my gratitude note, my problems and my breakthroughs.

What I love about this planner is that each month there is a value/character trait assigned to it and it just fascinates me that these character traits as well as the quotations in the pages depict so much of what I  have been going through.

There is no coincidence in God, something which I have learned since I got saved. I see this character trait as the one trait that I know God wanted me to have at that particular month/time of the year. It is just that I have to wait at what particular day of the month will I be needing this particular character trait.

For the month of March, this is the character trait: SURRENDER. 🙂

 

SurrenderPC

How timely, how accurate, how helpful – amazing our God is, isn’t He? He knows everything. The general quotation for this month also reveals much of what I needed in my marriage.

The first blog post I wrote for this year was entitled “An Appreciative 2016” simply because I felt that this year will be full of trials and yet we needed to see the beauty of them all. One of my experiences that helped me see things in the Light was after completing a crucial life-changing event which was a test of patience and endurance. After the event, this was what I received from my Mom using my Dad’s number (my Dad always replies in the vernacular):

PhotoGrid_1458616805656

My Mom is the authoritative type of parent. We don’t have the warm and cuddly mother and daughter relationship. YET, I have so many things that I should be thankful for when it comes to my Mom. For though we are so far away from each other and all my other siblings have their own priorities too in life and I used to live alone, my Mom just nailed it when she stressed out what I should be appreciating – the gift that God has given me which is a partner in life through a husband.

I smiled when I read it and of course, I can’t help but cry. Yes, I seldom receive text messages from my Mom because they are busy managing our house in the province and our farm, but when she does text, it is always something special – meaningful. Just that single text jolted me back to not see the negative things in my marriage but look at the brighter side of it.

I know I am not alone because I have learned to rely on God completely for the first two years of my life since I became a born-again Christian and I was living alone. I have devoted those two years in establishing a deeper and more personal relationship with God. God knows I needed that so when great trouble comes in the later years of my life, I know how to go back to Him.

Because I already know the Way, the Truth and the Life.

It is just that God reminded me that He gave me a husband for a reason and that once again, when troubles become overwhelming, SURRENDER. Just like how I surrendered 3 years ago. And after my “dark moments”  post on Facebook, I received a text message from an unidentified number. I am guessing the person is one of my sisters or brothers in Christ who have been touched by God to fulfill the role of being part of those “reminders.”  My extreme gratitude for this person whose heart belongs indeed to God. Praise God for your life my dear brother/sister.

And this was the text:

PhotoGrid_1458616842825

Our spiritual leaders in church, at home or anywhere else in our society have been called by God to receive the gift of prophecy. My Mom is not a devoted Christian but she believes in God and the bible and if there is one trait that I would like to learn from her, that is having a foresight. As a kid, she would always refer it to us as ESP (Extrasensory Perception)  or being able to determine what a person will do next or knowing what will happen next. It is “sixth sense”  to some and foresight to many. As a born-again Christian now, I see it as having the gift of prophecy. She told us that we should learn it and cultivate it for it will become very handy in our future plans and how we do things. Yup, practical my Mom really is. *wink*

My brother’s foresight is now almost similar to my Mom and we sometimes tell him that maybe he is the one who got it all from Mom. I am guessing it is this foresight that made him give the Paulo Coehlo planner to me in the first place and the significance it’ll bring in my spiritual journey. If I am to compare my Mom and my brother, they have one thing in common – they see things differently than all the rest of us. To me, I see all darkness and blur and yet to them, they see the beauty of it all, the goodness of the darkness and the events that will follow after.

Now if I am to compare it with faith, it says the same thing – train ourselves to see the Light. You can only see the Light when you see things in a Godly perspective. That is, allowing God to take over in driving the path of your life. Again, SURRENDER.

During the bad times, I oftentimes try to take control in solving things out. During the bad times, I see my spouse so differently and very much in the dark. But my Mom, the text message, and the monthly character traits, they all point towards the Light.

I have maintained my calm even if I do not understand all things. I have accepted things for how they should be. I have to be content in patiently waiting for the beautiful promises of the Lord. I know the Lord remains faithful to those who surrender to Him and walk in obedience to His ways.

As I end this article, I just want to share that indeed, God has mysterious ways in changing your mindset about a lot of things. Negative things can really replace the good memories, the good times, the good qualities you have if you will allow them to. God cannot allow it even if you persist to think things that way. The way that He gave me hope is the assurance that things right now are never final, they are only temporary in contrast to what is to come.

I woke up today feeling still very sleepy. My husband asked me if we are ready to pray and I just nodded half awake, half asleep. Through the sleepiness in me, there was one word, just one word that woke up my spirit in full blast through his prayer – REFLECT. I never prayed about the coming Lenten Season. Here is my husband though praying about it and how we should spend it together – REFLECT.

This is the perfect word on how we all should commemorate what Jesus did on the Cross for us -an act of SURRENDER, to surrender out of His Father’s and His love for us. It is this love that is keeping this marriage together, it is this love that is changing me and my spouse as a person, and it is this love that is changing our lives every single day.

It is by God’s love that I have been saved, that my husband will be saved including our families and loving another person through a marriage is where God wants us to learn the basics of what love is. When God’s love is in our hearts completely, we can say with utmost boldness that nothing can ever compare to God’s love and who God really is.

“We love because He first loved us.” – 1 John 4:19

God knows that 2016 will be full of trials that’s why God reminded me of that at the start of the year. The character trait for this year in my planner and what I will be needing most is this: COURAGE.

This is the courage to be bold in defying the challenges, courage to seek the Light amid the darkness, courage to stand true to my faith whatever the odds and the courage to proclaim my faith all the more despite my imperfections and setbacks. 🙂

CouragePC

I Had To

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I have to protect my rights as a wife and my children’s rights from being  verbally and physically abused…

I have to defend myself, my faith and my rights as a woman from persecution…

I have to ensure me and my children will have a life of peace…

I have to remember I also have a life outside being a wife…

I HAVE TO…

But I HAD TO…

I had to remember these verses:

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise makes knowledge acceptable, but the mouth of fools spouts folly. The eyes of the LORD are in every place, watching the evil and the good.” Proverbs 15: 1-3

“In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the Word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.” 1 Peter 3:1-2

“However, those the Father has given me will come to me, and I will never reject them. For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do my own will.” John 6:37

Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me.” Matthew 16:24

Yes, I had to. I had to accept, repent and turn back from my selfish ways and I had to accept trials and challenges for it is how I will carry my own cross.

Because I had to do the will of God, not mine, if indeed I consider myself a follower of Christ – Christine.