Embarking On A Solo Journey

I find it a little unusual that I am about to embark on a new journey with a new set of challenges and yet I have reached that point where I am at peace with everything. In fact, I’m very much looking forward to this new journey I already listed out so many plans though I know that God can change them any minute according to His will. And yet I am not a bit worried. I believe there’s only one explanation for this – God’s grace. 🙏🙂


“And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:7


My husband and I have agreed that whether he decides to work abroad or work here in Manila, I will go back to Bicol and live there. In other words, our decision to live separately whether he’s working here or abroad still remains. I told him I just can’t see my purpose here in Manila, and God is calling me to serve there in Bicol. God gave us the opportunity to stay in my hometown during the last quarter of 2022 until 2023 to find out if the provincial life is for him or not, see the situation at the farm, assess what needs to be done, and to also take care of Mom.

What 2022 And 2023 Were All About

The good thing about going back home in 2022 was that we got to see for ourselves that the farm indeed requires a lot of work and our initial plan to have a poultry farm project might have to wait. Our current challenge is the electricity installation which takes quite a long time before the application can be approved since the area is far from the town proper. Without electricity, it’ll be hard to find a farm caretaker who will live on the farm. And without a farm caretaker, we can’t start farm projects that have high-value products.

So, while waiting for the electricity to be installed, I told my husband that I would help him invest his earnings from his work abroad should he decide later on to retire early. And also, he will have a fallback because the future is very unpredictable. We don’t know if the next day there will be a WWIII and economic recession, which will most likely result in retrenchment, repatriation of overseas workers, migration issues, etc.

I’m currently studying recession-proof investment opportunities that won’t incur huge financial losses should the market demand decline given the country’s economic outlook for this year onwards. If God wills it that the investment commences according to the projected timeline, the profit will be added to his savings so he can use it to reinvest for business expansion or to try other investment vehicles. I told him this was my way of returning all the favors he did to help me when we were taking care of Mom at the hospital i.e. driving me to the hospital and back home, buying the meds while I stayed in the hospital room with Mom, massaging Mom because she chose him over me (😀), etc.

What Is It About Bicol As My Favorite Earthly Home

Why go back to Bicol if the farm projects were put on hold? God actually made me realize there are plenty of opportunities that I can explore in our community. I also have this urge to serve and give back to the community since this is our indoctrination in UP as an “Iskolar ng Bayan.” I also have plans to pursue a master’s degree again, but in agribusiness this time if God wills it. I was eyeing Bicol University Graduate School and already inquired back in 2021 if they held online classes for their MS Agribusiness course since face-to-face classes weren’t allowed back then.

Unfortunately, I still have to attend a couple of in-person classes if ever I get in and the campus is in Guinobatan, Albay. I did find another option offered by Bicol University Open University which is their Master in Management course. But, I still prefer a degree that is related to agribusiness. I just thought my siblings and I would benefit from this once we take over our family’s agribusiness. The transition has already started and my siblings and I need to learn everything double time because we don’t have any formal training/basic education in farming and agriculture. It was easy for Dad to manage farm duties because his work as a Civil Engineer at the National Irrigation Administration somehow made it possible for him to hit 2 birds with 1 stone.

Dare To Dream, Care To Serve

I was also considering going back to teaching as a faculty in college and teaching English Literature though I will be more effective in handling Writing classes. I could use my work experience since 2017 as a content writer in the digital marketing/e-commerce industry, which is one of the in-demand jobs right now. Another great opportunity that I am looking into is conducting summer writing workshops for high school and college students. I can also explore teaching opportunities in SpEd (Special Education). If God wills it, I also plan to pursue a doctorate degree much later on in life if it is still necessary.

It is also my dream to work in the public office and be part of the marketing/public relations division. I am also contemplating if it’ll be better if I become a public school teacher instead and help train young minds to create a resilient future. I studied in public schools my entire student life from grade school until grad school, and I observed that there is still more that can be done with our current educational systems. But if I will be a teacher in high school or grade school, I will need to renew my professional license and take CPD units for teachers.

Always Searching For God’s Will In Everything

Yes, the opportunities are endless. And yet it all boils down to knowing what we really want, and if what we want is also aligned to what God wants for us. Choosing for me is difficult because I have to carefully weigh the options considering other priorities and obligations, which will include farm duties. I am forever grateful to God though for these opportunities and yet I know these career goals and plans to pursue graduate studies can only happen given that I am 100% healthy. If not, working from home is the only choice I have.

So, I decided it would be best to rent a place in Sorsogon City and stay there from Friday until Monday because I will be attending Sunday church services in Victory Sorsogon. I already inquired about their Victory group/Bible study group, but unfortunately, they only meet during weekdays. So I’m praying I’ll find one that meets on Friday or Monday because from Tuesday to Thursday, I plan to be in my hometown, which is a 2-hour trip from Sorsogon City. I also plan on doing volunteer work in the church, so I have to be in the city during weekends.

Looking for a safe place to stay in Sorsogon City will be my first task when I get back to Bicol. I see it as the top priority, especially if I will need regular medical consultations, checkups, and treatments. Traveling back and forth from Bulan to Sorsogon City on a regular basis won’t be advisable. And I also don’t want to be a burden to my husband or my family because I know how emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausting it is to take care of a sick loved one.

Health Is Always Wealth, As They Say

The result of my repeated urinalysis last December actually showed that my RBC is still high even after a week of taking antibiotics, and it is still above the normal range. My second sister who’s a nurse in Norway told me I still have an infection and she’s suspecting it’s from dislodged kidney stones, and I might be asymptomatic for now. I actually have not met up yet with an internist at St. Luke’s Hospital because I don’t want to distract my husband since he is currently preparing for his exam. If I will be required to undergo further tests, it will definitely disrupt his plans. I am going back to Bicol anyway, and the doctors there might require that all of my tests should be repeated. So I thought I might as well do the tests when I’m already there.

The only other symptoms I have now are the rashes on my cheeks triggered by prolonged sun exposure when my husband and I started planting the forage plants last year. These skin flare-ups subside every time I take Coaltria, and I take this medicine daily. Coaltria was prescribed by my ENT doctor in 2022 for my severe allergic rhinitis.

I did a little bit of research and my rashes looked like a butterfly rash. I also have trigger fingers or it could be early signs of arthritis. And this led me to think that maybe I have lupus just like Kris Aquino. By the way, one thing you need to know about me is that if my Mom had white coat syndrome, I’m the opposite because I’m a hypochondriac. lol

So I did my research on lupus and found this ongoing study by Yale School of Medicine on how the lupus antibody can be used to treat breast cancer and ovarian cancer. Speaking of breast cancer, I am hoping Mom’s oncologist there in Bicol will be my doctor, too (Hello, Doc Leones! 😊). I hope he still has a Saturday schedule at the hospital in Sorsogon City where Mom was confined. He already knows our breast cancer history so maybe it might help in studying my case. I also would like to ask him about BRCA 1/2 gene mutation testing and know what my options are to reduce the risks of getting breast cancer if I don’t have it yet. My doctor will most probably say, “Christine, we have a lot of work to do because you’ve been delaying your medical checkup for a long time.Well Doc, I guess Science can never come up with a cure for stubbornness. lol But of course, my answer will be something like this: “I’ve been preparing for it, Doc. Let’s get started, it’s about time.

Seeing Problems Differently

I actually have a different approach when looking at problems. This is maybe the result of training myself over the years to always look at things from a different perspective and to go beyond what exactly is presented in front of you more like looking for the good in every bad situation. Or person even. So let’s say my doctor tells me I need to go through chemotherapy. Instead of looking negatively at the side effects of chemo, I’m going to see going bald, for instance, as an opportunity to try different hairstyles through wigs. I also get to try new hair colors because my hair is resistant to any type of hair dye.

So before my chemo session starts, I will already shave my head and start using a wig. I won’t wait until my hair starts falling off one by one because it will only trigger anxiety and depression. I already witnessed it with Mom. I just did not tell her because she loved it every time I combed her hair. I told her instead that the “Donya” hair bun I made for her looked really good on her. 😊 I also want to test if it’s uncomfortable to wear a wig for a long time, especially during hot and humid days.

If my doctor also tells me that it is best if I undergo a double mastectomy/lumpectomy like what my grandmother had (she lived up to 93 years old and Mom had a unilateral mastectomy in the 1990s before her breast cancer recurred), I am also going to look at it as an opportunity to maybe have my “dream breasts” should I opt to have breast reconstruction surgery later on. I call them “dream breasts” because they look like the ones that some actresses have which don’t move to the sides when lying down. 😁✌️

If I still have extra funds and my health is back to normal, I would like to use these funds to sponsor a child battling cancer who lacks the finances to get all the treatments.

God Does Things His Way Though We Can Also Have Prayer Requests

Right now, I’m actually in the process of bargaining with God that I’ll do anything He asks even if I sacrifice a lot of things but in return, He keeps me healthy because I still have a lot of things that I want to do and accomplish not only for me but for other people, too, such as the hospice facility.

The plan actually was originally intended for me and my siblings when we grow old because my eldest sister is the only one among us who has kids. I am targeting that the hospice facility will be completed once we’re in our late 60s if God wills it we reach this age. That will be 30 to 40 years from now. Maybe by then, a hospice facility will be feasible enough. If not, then my proposition is that we will use the project site for our retirement homes instead.

We are a family of planners. However, we are also well aware that plans change. I also look like I have already planned out everything and yet believe me when I say that these are the times when I just don’t have everything figured out.

I actually shared with one of my spiritual moms in church (Hi, Tita Lulu! 🥰) last year that I plan to use the remaining months of 2023 and the first few months of 2024 to sort out my life. She answered me with the best response, “Anak, hindi ikaw ang magaayos ng life mo kundi ang Dios. Hayaan mo Sya. Let go of the need to control everything, and let God take control.”

What Are We Leaving Behind That Will Not Be Forgotten

So why share all of these with the world? I know the world has this rule to not share your plans, but share the accomplishments and what you have achieved so far. We live in a result-oriented world where success is measured by achievements and accolades. The Bible also has a similar reminder to not say that you plan to put up a business in a particular place and make a profit from it. But the Bible also mentioned that we can actually say so but in a way that God will still have the final say on how our plans will turn out (James 4:13-17).

I just want to add that our intentions for sharing are what we should actually look into because I believe not everything we share is about boasting. Personally, I intend to share my life’s journey whether I fail or succeed in my endeavors. I’m a divergent and I don’t conform to the patterns of this world so my definition of success is different from the world’s definition of it. It is also not my purpose to make this blog a bragging wall. I believe that the process itself is as important as the result. My readers can learn from my experience and avoid making the same mistakes I did.

This is why I called my blog “The Journeyman’s Moments.” I am an apprentice, a student of life. The journey matters to me more. This blog is the legacy I want to leave behind as long as the IoT is here to stay. Because I don’t know if I will still be here tomorrow, next week, next month, or in the years to come. I hope that all the experiences I shared here will offer ideas and insights to whoever will stumble upon this blog in the future.

Thus, I am embracing and once again sharing this new journey with an open mind, a brave heart, and a grateful soul. And yet more importantly, I ask, “What else do You have in store for me in this new season, Lord, that You want me to share with the world?” 🙏


P.S. This is a very long read because I might not be able to share some updates once these plans start rolling, and I become extremely busy. But, I promise to find the time to share every twist and turn of my life’s journey. I also want to write a poem or two for you all because well, “love month” is here. Share the love, as they say. But I say, share it every day. ❤️😉

P.P.S. Stay tuned if the plans I listed above panned out as expected or if God has a different plan like 100% totally different. 😀

The 3 Not-So-Ordinary Kids I Met

Last night, I had the urge to eat out at one of the popular fast food chains in our place. When I arrived, all the seats downstairs were taken so I went up and was glad to see lots of available seats. I took a look around and chose the perfect spot for me to eat and stay for a while. It’s a seat which overlooks an intersection and where most of the traffic activity in the place converge. There’s also a glass window which gave me the opportunity to observe people behind me through the reflection.

I never really had an idea why I chose that spot but something in me told me about this word – story. Yes, the reason why I love observing people and activities is that I can get a lot of stories from them. As a writer, these scenes are an opportunity to come up with new and fresh ideas and concepts. They also propose a different take on a lot of things.

I believe God placed me in that seat to write this story.

Being seated at the end of the room, I can see from the reflection in the glass window if someone is approaching me. This night, there were 3 scenarios that came into play featuring 3-not-so-ordinary kids.

Scenario 1

The first kid who approached me was a street kid in rugged and dirty clothes carrying 5 pesos with him and drinking a soda from that fast-food chain which I believe was given by someone who also ate there or he could’ve bought it from the money he was able to gather from begging. The first thing he asked was if I can give him coins enough to buy him a meal for that night. I looked at him and though I normally don’t give out money to beggars, something in his appeal made me do so. I gave him a couple of coins but told him to buy it dinner. He then thanked me and went towards the next table.

Scenario 2

Another kid came by but this one’s different. He’s carrying a basket of packed marinated milkfish. The boy sounded like a young salesman with his bubbly sales pitch that almost sounded like an advertisement you hear on television. I thought it was entertaining and true enough, I wasn’t the only one who was entertained. He approached a couple eating at a table with his bubbly pitch and also joked around with the guy. He was able to hook his client – the guy took his offer to buy 3 pieces (1 set) for 120 pesos. Then the guy started asking him like who prepared the milkfish to which he answered that it’s his aunt. The guy actually tried to haggle saying he wants to buy 1 piece only. But the boy didn’t give in and smilingly told the guy that he only sells a 3-piece set and that he needs to be home soon because he will be going to school early the next day. He didn’t approach me although I was tempted to buy, too.

Scenario 3

Then, a few minutes later, another boy came in carrying a basket, too. But this time, the contents of his basket are polvoron. The boy approached me with a very sad introduction and offered his products almost to the point of begging. He already had around 60 pesos placed on top of the items. I looked at the boy and I declined his offer. He still wouldn’t budge until a high school student seated behind me called his attention saying he wanted to buy one.

God Calls For His Children

Most likely you will think of my actions as unfair. So why didn’t I buy from the last boy? I am unsure how the polvoron was prepared and I couldn’t cook it to make it safe to eat compared with the marinated milkfish. Although honestly, I feel sorry that I didn’t buy some because I really felt that I should. So I am praying to God I’d still have another opportunity to see this kid and I’ll buy what he has to offer.

Some will agree that it’s better to buy from kids than to give money to those who just beg. I also agree with this and that we need to empower them to strive instead of encouraging them to depend on other people for their needs by begging for money. I believe this will help solve the poverty mentality – that everyone has the opportunity to make a living as long as you have the discipline, perseverance, patience, and will power.

But this is not always the case. And this is why I gave coins to the first boy who begged me to give him some. Why? When I looked at the boy, the first thing I thought was, where are his parents? He looked as if no one’s taking care of him. So this means, he’s alone fending for himself trying to get by with whatever he has and what he can get from begging. But what I also thought is that he’s in need of a mentor, someone who can usher him towards the right opportunities to make a living like working in a car wash shop for example as a washer boy, etc.

Compared to the other two boys, they sure have parents or relatives who care for them because they have items to sell in the first place. They already have the means to make it out of poverty and there are people who are guiding them what to do and how to earn a living.

The Other Side of the Coin

Looking at all 3, it can give us the different facets of human life and the different kinds of people:

1.) Trying to live life with no support system – living by grace.

2.) Trying to earn a living with the help of relatives and enjoying it – a positive disposition.

3.) Trying to earn a living with the help of relatives but with a disgruntled heart – discontentment.

These are all hasty generalizations based on the different scenarios I have witnessed and I have no idea what really goes on in their lives or what they went through on that day. And yet each one of them carries a hope that all of us try to live out each day trying to make meaning out of what we do and why we do things.

I am praying for these kids and other kids like them. May God continue to guide them as they go about with life’s atrocities. All may come from different backgrounds and may be given different opportunities, and yet the gift of God is free for all and that is all that matters. I pray that is what they will experience and hold on to wherever fate would bring them as they get older. ❤

‘May the Lord bless you and protect you. May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you. May the Lord show you His favor and give you His peace.’ – Numbers 6:24‭-‬26

Hope for the Young Generation

This is an excerpt from my previous article but I added this part a bit later after the article was published. I thought it would be best if I share it separately in another blog post. 🙂

“I cannot do all those if I lack in finances. Volunteering, for me, can only do so much. I want to help in a way that I can see these people slowly reach their dreams and see them aim towards better opportunities in life.

The recent killings of juvenile delinquents here in the Philippines are very alarming. Not only that. These juveniles are rising by the number and are becoming more aggressive. If only the spiritual family can reach out to them before another young life becomes a collateral damage again, the better opportunities for these kids to have another chance in life. Poverty is not reason enough why these kids should resort to crime, robbery, and drugs and vice versa.

Poverty has an end. Education can be a tool for that – financial education, family planning education, livelihood education, and regular schooling. Faith makes it all happen.

If money is the problem, there are foundations willing to provide scholarships to students as long as students meet a certain criteria and fulfill a set of obligations. Just to mention a few, we have in church the Real Life Foundation. World Vision and Operation Blessing also provide that. These kids don’t actually need a one-time outreach event. What they need is serious mentoring making sure they’ve been given the right opportunities toward a better life through empowerment.

I am never a fan of spoon-feeding when it comes to succeeding in life in general. Just the way my parents have taught me, it is all about personal effort which contains persistence, patience, and resilience. And yet faith has taught me too that it is only God who provides EVERYTHING we need and that we should trust in Him alone.”

These kids need faith. They don’t need money per se but who they really need is God in their lives. I know more opportunities will arise in the following years – game changers, radicals, advocates, catalysts of social change, the academe, and businesses will unite toward one common goal with God at the center.

I am believing there is nothing impossible with God. That’s why I am claiming it as early as now and doing the best I can in my own little way to fulfill God’s will not just for my life but for the rest of the world.

Because this is what it really means to be the salt and light in the world and that is our mission here in this world as sons and daughters of God – preach the Gospel and share the love of God.

“So you see, faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless.” – James 2:17

“Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need.” – Matthew 6:33

Sweet Groanings of the Heart in The 4th Year Anniversary Special

Before anything else, I’d like to share this insightful article from Forbes especially for the young professionals:

“The Top 5 Regrets of Mid-Career Professionals”

So my Mom and I had a serious heart-to-heart talk about some things especially about my graduate study. It’s been taking far too long years are passing by fast and it seems I haven’t done anything productive at all nor made significant improvements not just in it but in my life in general.

So questions like what are your plans, what do you want to do now, where do you want to be when you get older, etc. came popping up.

Truth is, I wasn’t totally pleased with how my life has faired throughout these years. To most people it seems like I have wasted 6 years to nothing. But I think I am going to take back that word “displeased”  because doing a self-assessment, I am happier in those 6 years wherein I am in a limbo and in shambles or I thought I was.

First and most importantly, I found God along the way – I was born again. Second, I found love in this world and my better half unexpectedly – I got married. Lastly, a lot of changes happened internally – major heart reconstruction. These 3 are now my priorities which I was called to serve first.

So my Mom went on, “As parents we only wanted what is best for all of you and your siblings, a better and more successful life.”

I do appreciate this kind of love from my parents. I know when I become a parent I wanted what is best for my kids too.

She continued, “If you wanted to have a simple life though, nothing is wrong with that.”

Now this I loved from her even more. So I smiled and agreed:

“Yes Mommy, that is all I ever wanted in this life. I actually wanted to go back home in our province and raise my family there if God wills it. We wouldn’t have these ideals and values in life if it wasn’t for the humble beginnings of you and Dad in which you have raised us all. City life has far too much temptations and is way complicated.

I want my kids to have the same values and ideals in life too and I think I won’t be able to do that if they will grow up seeing that Brian and I pursue what this world offers as the meaning of success like wealth, possessions, achievements and titles.”

A “higher”  and more successful position/career requires more time at work and more work load. This is practically what graduate studies are for – promotion at work and/or career advancement. I may be earning much and I now have a title that society declares as prestigious but I have less time with my family because either I am too tired when I get home, I am bringing work at home or I have longer working hours in the office. My kids will only be young once and my husband is my top priority next to God.

Then memories of the day I had my altar call which was during the Singles’ Getaway in church back in year 2012 reminded me once again about what Pastor Dennis Sy discussed regarding priorities. He shared an experience between him and his wife who wanted to pursue her dream to become a medical doctor.

What he said made a mark in me as well (paraphrased already),

“Your degree/profession won’t be able to hug you in times that you are sad nor will it be beside you in times of trouble. But I can.”

She chose to let go. Priorities-wise, when we are called to be married and have families, they are to be on top. Indeed, these are the sacrifices that born-again spouses and parents have to make when it comes to priorities. I have read an article (I couldn’t exactly remember the title) by Mrs. Marie Bonifacio, wife of Pastor Joey, regarding the hierarchy of priorities: God, spouse, family, career and ministry.

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A great reminder. ❤

I love God, I love my spouse and I love my family – these are what matters in my case now. My career will have to come next and maybe my other ambitions will have to fade away. I am still seeking for God’s direction in this area though, a period of patiently waiting and enduring.

“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” – Matthew 6:34

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7

There are those who were called to a life of leadership and excellence in the corporate world and professional industry among men and women alike. There are also those who were called to serve the ministry. There are those too who were called to serve their families. These are just some of the areas we were called to serve and we all fall in either of those categories one way or the other.

I believe this is the season that God is slowly clearing the view from obstacles so I could walk the path straight and yet asking me to get even closer and more in tune with Him. I trust God that He will guide me and my future family according to His plans. It may mean denying myself what this world offers at this point going against the norm and maybe going against the wishes of many which can be heartbreaking but I know in the end it will all glorify God.

I am, in fact, happier where God has put me now as long as it gives Him all the Glory and Honor He deserves. 🙂

“Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take.” – Proverbs 3:6

P.S.

This might be my last post for this year or for a couple more years even (only God knows) because I am planning to do a social media hibernation in most of my social media accounts for I don’t know how long as part of my personal prayer and fasting. There is so much I need to pray for in my life including my current health condition, my family, my country and this world and I need to seek for God’s will and instructions without distractions and temptations just like what Jesus did.

So I am temporarily ending my 4-year activity in blogosphere and passing on the baton to the new generation of faith-based bloggers. Today’s the 4th year anniversary of this blog too and I got this notification the other day about reaching 500 readers who stayed patient enough in reading this faith-based blog. Kind of a great way to end a season, eh? *wink*  I believe this particular season has come to a temporary halt and God is calling me to a new season, a new task. Who knows, I might be back in just a week. lol 😀

( To God be all the Glory!)

But I am definitely sure I will be reconnected with you all again in God’s perfect time. So ciao for now my dear readers. Keep praying, keep on blogging and keep the faith always! ❤ 🙂

Sentimental: Who Am I?

I am down with my usual migraine attack (on its 5th day now), but this time accompanied by a high fever and eczema too. Whew! It’s kind of difficult to manage everything when every illness you have bolted in altogether. Though I took medicines yesterday, my husband (a nurse) and the doctor at the university infirmary advised me to take 3-5 days of bed rest for my follow-up check-up on Monday, and limit physical activity. While in bed, I thought about writing something.

Speaking of my husband, though, I appreciate him for his nonchalance. That is one thing I wanted to learn from him – how to maintain a worry-free attitude despite the disarray or when things have gone awry. I am, on the other hand, the exact opposite – I worry about everything! 😀 But through time, I have learned to control my worries, and I’ll share how in the succeeding paragraphs.

Dealing With Life’s Atrocities

I know there came in your life wherein you have never felt good enough – as a spouse, as a child, as a parent, as a student, as an employee, as a friend, as a relative, and ultimately as a person.

As a Christian teacher, I have learned that it is even more important to speak life than to criticize students. We might never know; we are already crushing the dreams of a young spirit because of the negativity. Though trials produce resiliency, positive reinforcement is still best. The world is already complicated enough, mainly because we, humans, made it that way.

Every person is different. It’s the same as how every seed grows to be a different plant. Every plant has its own tender and loving care requirements. Yet all plants need sunshine; they all need light.

The Breaking And The Making

When I was a grade school student, I had my first taste of disappointment when I didn’t win as president of the student council, and I was reprimanded during the campaign period along with the rest of my running mates. The offense? We were late in Math class for just a few minutes, and we weren’t allowed to enter the classroom. I took it as my responsibility to take the blame, being the running President, and seeing your peers crying out of shame was enough to break your heart to pieces.

When I was in high school, I had another major disappointment when I only graduated as “special mention” in class after consistently being on the top 3 honors list from 1st year until 3rd year, but failed to meet the criteria for the extracurricular activities, which comprised a huge percentage of the final grades. One of my high school best friends suffered the same fate. We were advised by our parents to never receive the award during the graduation ceremony, though our names were called because they said that we do not deserve it, but we were present during said ceremony.

When I was in college, I wasn’t able to finish my thesis on time because the adviser from our concentration was on sabbatical leave. We were assigned instead to another adviser from another concentration. After submitting my first draft, I got it back only to see red marks written everywhere, and the one thing that was retained in me was this comment: “How did you reach this far if you don’t know how to make a research paper? This is not the work of a UP student!”

I thought, maybe I should also ask my former professors why they passed me in all my other subjects if I am undeserving to be in UP. 😀 Little did I know that there were several of us who got the same remarks. Yep, in our university, you’ll encounter all sorts of professors, but when it comes to critical feedback, I understood it all as part of doing their jobs as teachers.

Then I worked, a dream job it was. But disappointment once again came. The mission and vision of the workplace weren’t met because one of the figures of authority behaved otherwise. I was the recipient of that very unprofessional behavior, and many have seen it. It happened a couple of times, too. I stayed and chose to keep quiet. But after praying about it, I had to let the job go.

God’s Path Towards Salvation

So these were all hang-ups of the past, which I am sure most of us have experienced one way or the other. Others may have gone through even worse than all these, and if given the chance, they are very much entitled to unleash their grievances as much as they want. But unfortunately, as much as we would like to shake them off, they are already embedded in who we are.

All those years, I have struggled with the need to impress, to seriously meet expectations, to be perfect, to excel always, and to prove myself to people. I suffered from anger and resentment boiling in me, and the need to take revenge and retaliate was so strong. I blamed life for bringing me people who did nothing but criticize me for my weaknesses, and only that, and went beyond in criticizing who I am personally, without even the slightest hint of who I really am and what I can do. This resentment and anger included some issues in other areas of my life, too, which I will not share due to their sensitivity. I really thought I was the unluckiest person alive back then.

For 27 years, I have battled with insecurity, the by-product of low self-esteem, poor self-image, and self-worth – the mentality that “I am never good enough.” Failures, wrong decisions, and disappointments became the stronghold that corrupted my entire being until it led me to a major depression – the breaking point, as they say.

Depression robs you of the beauty of life. It makes life look bleak, bland, and distorted. It affects your every decision, and it just kills life itself. Before I was born again in 2013, I committed suicide twice – both were failed attempts.

No, I do not easily give up. I did arrive at that breaking point on the verge of quitting everything, but I still fought hard against it.

I had two options: let the darkness corrupt me and become those people who plagued others or themselves with it OR choose to search for the light, the hope.

Knowing The Savior

The opportunity came for the latter – I was given HOPE.

The greatest moment of my life was when I was born again through my faith. Why? It’s because when I found out who I was in Christ, that was the greatest and the best thing that I have heard about myself for 27 years.

It was on that day when I surrendered myself to Christ that ALL chains got loose – I was set FREE.

The moment has already come for me to look at things from a very different perspective – a total paradigm shift. It wasn’t everything I hoped for, BUT it’s exactly what I NEEDED which no one else could give me except God.

This HOPE taught me even more than what I have learned in the academe or even from life itself. It taught me how to patiently wait for the right opportunities and how to patiently endure every setback. It taught me that there is a time for everything. It taught me to decline job offers and business opportunities that could’ve made me rich in wealth and possessions. It taught me to pass up on chances of earning titles that would’ve given me some sort of self-entitlement and self-fulfillment. It taught me to weigh options, sacrifice if I must. All of these, if they will, in the end, forfeit my soul.

It taught me to choose God’s will over mine. It taught me to rely on God’s plans rather than rely on my own understanding of the circumstances around me. It taught me to relinquish control and allow God to take over. It taught me that GRACE is a gift freely given, even if undeserving. It taught me how to love others even when they do not deserve it. It taught me to find joy, peace, and contentment even when darkness, chaos, and bitterness are all around. It taught me how to let go of the past and forgive.

It taught me what true humility is all about. It taught me to be grateful always. It taught me that simplicity matters most in life. It taught me to look outwardly and consider what others are going through as well. It taught me that if there is a void that the atrocities of life have caused in me, either by wrong choices or by fate, no one and nothing else can fill it up except God.

I found this hope in Christ alone, and I find strength in the Word every day, which is my guide in this life – not any textbook, novel, or company brochure.

“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” – Hebrews 11:1

Faith Anchored To Our Souls

Faith did not make my life free from criticism, condemnation, trials, and suffering. Yet it gave me a way to view life beyond that – salvation in eternity.

I still find myself in situations I have stated in the first part of this article. But this time, I have learned to see these instances from a different standpoint. I have learned to understand first where some people are coming from and why they are that way. I have learned to understand that maybe they are still in the darkness, too, driven perhaps by the need to compete, to be the best, and to meet expectations, dealing with their own insecurities and personal struggles, too. Or they have this false motive to instill in those who are next in line exactly what they went through, because in this “dog-eat-dog” world, repaying evil with evil is normal. Only God knows everything. What I observed, though, is that when people prick each other to bleed, it’s better to choose to be the rose among the thorns – the salt and light. 🙂

There are times the past comes all rushing back; it haunts. Another disappointment will ruffle your feathers. The need to lash out and punish calls. But I choose LIFE. I will speak LIFE.

Because Christ has given me LIFE. He, alone, gave me LIGHT. It is my duty as His follower to use that light so others can walk in and with Him, too, despite the darkness around them.

Ah, yes. Them.

One day, they will be brought out in the light, too. They will break standards, cultural traditions, and not conform to this world wherever they may be and whatever they may be doing. They will choose to fight for faith and spread light when hope seems dim. That was the reason I was smiling because I was praying for them silently, and I am claiming it all in the Mighty Name of Jesus, who made it possible for me, too. 🙂

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth, you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33

P.S.

It’s been 3 years now since I got saved, and when things don’t go the way I’ve expected them to be, I have this bookmark to remind me of who I am. I thank the sister in Christ who gave this when she facilitated a talk during my baptism of the Holy Spirit. I have carried it with me since then. The last verse listed is my life verse. 🙂


What matters is who I am in Christ. 🙂

Oh, and yes, one new thing I have learned too from our couples’ bible study Vgroup 2 Sundays ago (thanks Tito Tony and Tita Len for the wisdom) – the boiling water concept. If you put eggs in boiling water, they become hard. But if you put the potato in it, it becomes soft. I choose to be a potato – a couch potato. Kidding. *wink*

Seriously, it only means that when life and circumstances knock you down, don’t bear any grudge and don’t be hard on yourself and on others. Instead, let it soften you, let it refine you, and let it make you better. Be a better potato, I mean, a better man/woman. 😉

Last but not least, reach out to God, and then God will send His people (spiritual family) to help usher you out of the ordeal. I am praying for your struggles, too, my dear reader and brother/sister in Christ. If you also need to share a tough ordeal and are in need of a prayer intercession, you may always pop me an email. ❤

For The Love of Teaching

I am a teacher and yet I am also a student. That is, a student of life – I learn from life experiences. Technically though, I am a student.

I was advised to take a penalty course alongside my thesis for overstaying in the university where I am taking my graduate study. We have the privilege to choose which subject are we going to take and I opted Art Education being a lover of arts in all medium – visual, dance, language, music, etc.

We haven’t met our professor yet but when I saw our course syllabus, I smiled and thought, “I like this professor.”  Not that there are professors that I don’t like because honestly, I loved them all even though back in college I had harsh experiences with some of them. I love them for the sake that without them I won’t be where I am now and I won’t be who I am now. I appreciate what they teach may it be in a terrifying or encouraging manner. It doesn’t make any difference at all anyhow – the important thing is I have learned. But if I am to choose though, I’d still want to be a teacher who uses positive reinforcement. 🙂

Going back to Art Education, you might have wondered what made me assume that I am going to like my professor. It is because of this, the one which I encircled in red. It may sound simple enough but we share the same advocacy:

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Amazing our God, isn’t He? He not only gave me the course I wanted, but even more than that. It is always hitting two birds with one stone when God does His ways. I can only hope and pray though that more educators will become like my professor – teaching how to set the limit and the balance in preserving and conserving the natural in the midst of the ever developing modernity through man-made technologies.

I saw myself in my professor. I was given the opportunity 3 years back to teach Grade 3 and 4 pupils in a private school as their sub teacher in English. I have always loved reading and writing even when I was a kid. Why reading? It enhances critical thinking skills and improves vocabulary, creativity, and imagination. Why writing? This is the avenue to use the vocabulary learned while reading so it would be stored up in the memory bank.

I wanted to gauge the students’ English vocabulary so I gave them an activity which will test their visual learning and writing abilities. In a sheet of bond paper, I printed various photos of different kinds. I asked them to write their answers at the back of the bond paper to encourage recycling. They are to write a paragraph of at least 5 sentences wherein they will make a story out of all the photos coming up with one coherent essay. In short, they have to connect each photo with the other to come up with a story line.

I advised that the mode of writing is freestyle meaning they do not have to follow any criteria other than what I have instructed above. I personally love learning outside the box so I am in favor of social and experiential learning wherein learning is not just limited inside the classroom nor textbooks. I tend to miss out a lot of details in the instructions when I was a student so I know how it feels for a student to strictly adhere to teacher’s instructions and guidelines. *wink*

When it was time for the worksheets to be submitted, I couldn’t contain my excitement to read all their works. I was expecting I’d be seeing really fascinating stories knowing that children of today’s generation are more cognitively advanced than the generation my age. My expectations were all met – I found myself laughing out loud with all their brilliant ideas. That is, when you let kids be kids. *smiles*

Most of the kids had fun doing the activity even for those who were kinesthetic learners and opted to add more to the illustrations in relaying their stories or those who preferred to share them verbally just because they learn best when there is physical activity or movement. Now for this latter, this is a challenge since in teaching, there is no “one size fits all”  medium of instruction. Lesson plans and activities have to be prepared and presented in a manner that will meet the needs of most students regardless how diversified they may be and depending upon their learning styles. Not to mention the values and discipline that they have to acquire in class.

This may sound too challenging to a teacher and even more challenging if you are to teach in a public school (my next article). BUT if the passion for teaching is there, the greatest reward is nothing more and nothing else but to impart knowledge. 🙂

P.S.

Sharing some of my former Grade 3 students’ works:

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Movie Feature: “Homeless to Harvard”

I was browsing YouTube for music videos when I saw this in the recommended list. There were about 3, 903, 503 views already when I checked it out. The first few scenes made me a bit sentimental already but the scenes portray so much of what real life is all about it is such a total miss if I do not watch it – the more realistic, the more interesting and inspiring. It is in actuality a true to life story. 🙂

I do not plan on making this article as a movie review so you’d watch the whole thing, but I just want to highlight the role/s of the teachers in this film. I can totally relate to them. Though I do not have an extensive teaching experience (yet) in my work background, I do felt that it is my calling to teach and not just teach but teach those who have only smaller chances of making it out to a better and brighter future. It is about giving chances and about the fact that our circumstances can never define our destiny. It is actually our choices that lead us to our destiny.

This has always been my prayer – not for me but for these young minds and young hearts. ❤

The Teacher

First and foremost, I’d like to give God the honor and glory for this wonderful blessing that He has bestowed upon me – the opportunity to be a teacher. 🙂

I took the licensure examination last March and I wasn’t expecting I’d pass it. I was assigned to take the exam for the Secondary Level because of my undergraduate course which is Literature and I am not yet done with my master’s degree in Special Education. During the Licensure Exam For Teachers, the specialization part of the exam for the Secondary Level takers was difficult. I had a little distraction too as the day before I took the exam, husband and I had a little argument. Not to mention I started reviewing just a week before the said exam as I have a short span when it comes to memory retention. But despite all that accompanied by heartfelt prayers and quiet time conversations with God, He remained faithful – I still passed the exam.

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To God Be The Glory: March 2016 LET

This has made me believe in this – I was indeed called by God to be a teacher. Our family was called to be a family of teachers, from grandparents to aunts and uncles, to parents and siblings.

Yup, I am not the only teacher in the family. I have to thank them too for all the love and support they have given to me in all my endeavors and in my plight to becoming an educator. 🙂

When people finds out that you are a teacher, the first thing they say is that you are brimming with patience. As much as it is true, what people really don’t know are the obligations that a teacher truly have in performing her role in society.

I’d like to share the Preamble from the Code of Ethics for Professional Teachers to highlight said role:

“Teachers are duly licensed professionals who possesses dignity and reputation with high moral values as well as technical and professional competence in the practice of their noble profession. They strictly adhere to, observe, and practice this set of ethical and moral principles, standards, and values.”

The teacher not only teaches but she is also a catalyst of social change. She instructs and yet she disciplines, she adheres and yet she rebukes. Those are her roles in society – far bigger than what we all commonly imagine. As some would say, teachers are the ones responsible for honing the future engineers, architects, doctors, nurses, lawyers and basically every other profession in our society. In other words, the teacher performs quite a huge part in the raising of responsible citizens of the society.

This is a very big responsibility on the part of a teacher for it means that everything she says and does should match what her profession has called her to do. They should include at all times everything that was discussed in the Code of Ethics for Professional Teachers. But greater than that is the set of moral values and principles that she upholds to for these are the moral values and principles that she will be imparting to her students. These set of standards will now become the students’ guide in following who to imitate when they enter adulthood.

Yes, the teacher is the second  “Mom.”  The things that are being taught at home are also reinforced in school. It comes with great responsibility to be the  “mother”  of many children and raise them as individuals who will serve the country and their countrymen with the right and proper moral values and principles.

If you are to ask me why they are important, it is actually these values and moral principles that define who we are rather than what family we came from, what school we graduated from, where we work/worked, what are our titles, what place did we come from or what organizations are we affiliated with. The kind of values system that we have basically affects every decision that we make in life for they are the ones that govern the heart and the mind. Whatever governs the mind and the heart will govern our words, our thoughts and our actions a.k.a. how we speak, how we do things, how we react, how we feel, etc.

If you are a teacher like me, this will sound too challenging. A student can graduate at his worst or at his best depending on how the teacher has honed him/her inside the classroom through what she teaches may it be in academics or moral standards. So if one will ask, where can a teacher find the best guide in achieving such high standards of morality?

The simple answer is this: the BIBLE.

No other scripture or written literature can ever contain what the bible contains. What the bible contains are all instructions on living a life with high moral standards because we have a God who has HIGH standards.

I was called by God to be a teacher not just to teach students about English, Science or any other academic subjects but more importantly, to teach them the necessary moral principles that they need in life here in this world and life in eternity.

Some may have questioned why I need to disclose such sensitive matters on Facebook and my reason was this in light of the Scripture:

“Those who continue in sin, rebuke in the presence of all, so that the rest also will be fearful of sinning.” – 1 Timothy 5:20

“All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.” – 2 Timothy 3:16 – 17

I have made a covenant that if I am to discipline a student or rebuke someone, it will and it should always be in light of the Scripture. I believe the bible holds much authority than I do and will demand much respect from those who will hear or read it for it is God’s word in written form.

There are so many issues that have been plaguing the society, marriages, personal struggles and families for ages and yet in our society, it is such a taboo to talk about these sensitive issues thus resulting to ignorance and mistakes being committed repeatedly. Name all kinds of issue that this world is suffering from, the bible has something to say about it. More often, what the bible says are all for the good of mankind. It is just that there have been only quite a few teachers who were bold and courageous enough to address these issues by sharing the Scripture pertaining to these specific issues.

They say, “History repeats itself.”  Indeed, it is true. What the bible contains are all historical events mainly for the purpose of guiding and teaching us as we will most probably go through the same experiences.

I want to save families from breaking apart, save children growing in hostile environments, and save future generations from committing the same mistakes as their ancestors did only because we did not do our part in rebuking and sharing what should be the right things to do according to the Scripture.

All we need are teachers who will be bold in sharing the Truth and courageous enough to go against what the society calls as taboo or shameful to talk about. Maybe it is time that we, as believers and born-again Christians, shed light upon matters and issues that have been plaguing relationships, marriages and families for decades already.

Wouldn’t this world be a better place for our children to live in when we are assured they’ve been taught how to live righteously so they can benefit from this righteous living and that they will be saved from the perils that their ancestors have went through?

All these can be done with just a simple task of teaching and rebuking when God calls for it. God is calling for us to protect our marriages now, our children’s future families and the families and children of other people as well through the best teaching material which is the bible. He is calling us to LIVE in the BIBLE, teach it to our children and then share it to others so they will be enlightened too.

My challenge? Do not be ashamed of sharing and teaching the Gospel for in it is where all the solutions lies to all our problems. It has been blessed by God for the very purpose of making known to everyone from whom authority does the bible is referring to and the salvation that it offers not just to us but for the future generations.

Another challenge? Obedience and discipline can come too difficult – these have been my struggles until now. My husband and I do not share the same set of values system which oftentimes create the tension in our marriage. But I am assured God will be with me in my every battle and in my every struggle. I just have to fulfill the mission, the tasks that He has set out for me to finish.

In this struggle to abide by the law and to fight for these laws, you will feel pain, resistance, persecution, sadness and yet constantly remind yourself to “fix your eyes upon Jesus, the author and the perfecter of faith.”  The early disciples felt all these too and yet they endured it all in the midst of their sacrifices.

Those who were called to fulfill their mission, this is our end goal – KEEP THE FAITH and TRUST GOD COMPLETELY.

Learn from the One Great Teacher, be a teacher, and be a disciple. I am continuously praying that God will prepare and guide me in this new season. 🙂

Ode On Morality

Tin Ginete

Beauty amid the blackness.

In every society, morality is that one thing that makes civilization intact by bringing public order. These are the moral dictates and code of ethics that I, too, was subjected for strict compliance not because I am a teacher but because I am a citizen of a civilized society.

If we are to look closely on all the generations, past and present, and the standard of morality today, can we actually say and claim that it has declined? Or is it all just a matter of generational gaps, adaptability and acceptance of the changing times?

Laws are the social constructs that preserve any community. As a Christian, I only got to know this one fact when I got saved – we are all governed by one law and that is His Word through the bible.

“Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.” – Psalm 119: 105

“Your Word, O Lord, is eternal; it stands firm in the heavens. Your faithfulness continues through all generations; you established the earth, and it endures. Your laws endure to this day, for all things serve you. If your law had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction. I will never forget your precepts, for by them you have preserved my life.” – Psalm 119: 89-93

Would it be safe then to assume that we actually have no use for our current justice system? What about the laws we are obeying now? They are laws which could be as faulty and imperfect as the one who made them – man. They were made by the leaders of the generations before and the generation now.

Such are the questions that I asked and I was given the answers:

“Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.” – Romans 13: 1

“Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority, because they keep watch over you as those who must give an account. Do this so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no benefit to you.” – Hebrews 13: 7

I used to be a critic of reality to the point that I dare question what is existing or preexisted. But the Truth was given and I stopped asking questions. And I, myself, can clearly attest to this:

“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for good work.” – 2 Timothy 3:16-17

The standards of morality may change over time and yet there is this one law that stays true, valid and trustworthy for decades and centuries:

“Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” – Joshua 1: 8

Bible reading and an attitude of prayer will get you that far in life. Because that is what the Law says. Not mine, not yours, but His. 🙂

“There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the One who is able to save and destroy.” – James 4: 12

Girl Rising: The Undefeated Bella

girlrising.com

girlrising.com

It is all about women empowerment for the International Women’s Month celebration this March. 🙂

To cap the month off, read more from this article for a Girl Rising review and if you want to be part of the women’s movement advocacy internationally and locally.

http://www.wheninmanila.com/rise-up-the-modern-filipina-girl-rising-amidst-social-and-cultural-barriers/