Tag Archives: dating

What You Need To Know About Sigma Females And INTJs

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I’ll be very busy this week preparing for my trip back to Bicol next week, so I might not be able to post a new article here on my blog for a while. I thought I’d share with you a couple of articles about “Sigma Females” and the “INTJs.” These two personality types closely define who I am. And hopefully, too, these articles will help you understand why I’m a unicorn, the mythical creature. 🦄😅

If you’re dating a woman or are interested in dating a girl, try to find out if she is in either or both of these categories. Because our types are rare (the rarest actually according to research) BUT not easy to handle. Study her first, and ask yourself if she’s worth pursuing. This might just save you from a painful heartbreak later on. 👍

Identifying An INTJ

“INTJ: Personality Type, Characteristics And More”

“The Philosophy of Why INTJs are So Attractive (And How to Leverage It)”

About INTJ – ‘The Mastermind’

“INTJ Personality Type: The Architect”

“Dating an INTJ Female”

“How To Spot An INTJ Female”

I discovered I’m an INTJ during the volunteers’ training I attended in church back in 2014. The organizers included the personality test to identify what are our strengths and weaknesses that could either help or impede in performing our duties as volunteers.

I’m not surprised I scored 90% in introversion. 😅
For the NTJ parts of the test, I have almost median scores. I am assuming I might also be an INFJ or an ISTP depending on the circumstances I’m in.

Who Is A Sigma Female?

“The SIGMA FEMALE | 0.1% The Rarest Female on Earth”

“Sigma Female Personality Traits Explained”

“Sigma Woman: An Independent and Mysterious Personality”

Myers-Briggs Personality Test

“Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI): A Beginner’s Guide”

“Myers-Briggs Definition”

“Myers-Briggs Official Website”

“Myers-Briggs Type Indicator in Medical Education: A Narrative Review and Analysis”

“How good is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator for predicting leadership-related behaviors?”

While these articles can help you understand Sigma females and INTJs a bit more, I would still recommend being friends with someone for a long time before pursuing a romantic relationship with him or her. It’s best to know a person based on how you two get along – that is, great chemistry. And if God is at the center of it, the bond will be unbreakable. ♥️

Here’s a great article on Christian dating: “The Golden Rule In Christian Dating.”

“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” – Ecclesiastes 4:12

Relationship Advice: Don’t Love The Looks!

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This is a 1 AM thought which is a by-product of too much caffeine in my system. Hello, insomnia! 😀

Just to share with you in light of the topic, I have had a series of failed relationships in my past before I became a born-again Christian and before I met my husband. It was a very “rocky” portion of my life but it’s also one of the seasons where I had the greatest learning when it comes to relationships.

Now that I am married, I am still not exempted from these “rocky” moments but the lessons now are way different. Here are some tips I can share from my previous experiences on relationships and dating.

2014 snapshot for a fashion feature article with When in Manila.

Advice # 1

My advice to the single ladies out there, never ever attract a man by showing too much skin. It does appeal to their carnal senses but in reality we all know a relationship based purely on physical attraction won’t last. Why? You will only look “young” and “sexy” for a short while. If he likes you because of this, expect that when a “younger-looking” woman comes along, he’ll trade you for her.

Advice # 2

Don’t go either for temporary, fleeting mutual attractions that are only good for as long as happy moments last. Nor go after a complicated, no-strings-attached relationship. Believe me, women are always on the losing end and lose more than what they have bargained for in this kind of relational setup. You are only young once – use your youth wisely by investing in a relationship that will last for the long term. This is in fact your only goal why you enter a relationship – marriage until death parts you both.

Advice # 3

Attract a man who loves you for who you are – your good and bad side. And love a man not because he is a smooth talker, but because you are ready to love him even if he is in his worst which you will only see when you share one home for a long period of time – marriage.

Never fall for the “best foot forward” appeal especially if you’ve known him for a couple of months only. A man’s true colors are only revealed when you have known him for years as a friend. Only then can you say that your relationship has a chance to grow and mature on a romantic level. Or if you two can make it “until death does us part.”

What Matters

If you have a choice, choose a man who loves God more than he loves you – this is priceless. Go for the authentic Christian and a man of God in spirit and not by word and by action alone. That is if you want a “less rocky” relationship.

Lastly, go for someone who will fight for you and someone you’re also willing to fight for whatever the odds. This as you both work together in putting God at the center of your relationship and as you both work your way in becoming Christlike with every shared moment as a couple. ❤

From a woman who learned love the hard way but who is now after God’s heart,

How To Identify A Low-Maintenance Woman | 3 Things To Know

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The characteristics of a low-maintenance woman may vary differently depending on a lot of factors such as personality, background, upbringing, culture, etc. But one common feature that low-maintenance ladies have is being low-key in almost everything. You may check out the articles I compiled below about low-maintenance ladies and some things about me and why I’m low-maintenance. 🙂

What Do Low-Maintenance Women Have in Common?

How Am I A Low-Maintenance Woman?

These are my personal preferences but you and I might share the same interests so please read ahead. 😀

1. My ideal date is nature-tripping.

Everything that nature offers is for free. But you might still have to shell out a little cash in some cases. Personally, I am not a fan of mall dates. I regard the mall only as a place where we check out new restaurants to try and where I buy all the stuff that I need. Nothing more.

I see other better ways in spending time than to walk aimlessly around the mall looking at all the stuff that I won’t buy because I don’t need them. I am low-maintenance so I only buy the things that I need which will be explained in item #2.

I am not into fine-dine dates either because I find it too constricting. You have to dress like this, act like this, say this and that, and don’t act like this or don’t dress this way, etc. I guess I adopted this nonchalant attitude way back in college where we have the freedom to do anything we wish as nonconformists of society’s dictates as long as we don’t violate any written law. But do it while keeping our honor intact.

In other words, be yourself. Even if it means wearing “home clothes” going to school. Yep, I always go to school wearing big tees and jeans and my favorite pair of all-around slippers. And Havaianas are not yet out during our time. 😉

Always the T-shirt girl.

T-shirt is life.

So when my husband and I were still dating and he asked me out on our first date where I want it to be, I told him that I want it somewhere surrounded by nature. Not a fine-dine restaurant but something casual. And I believe this is the reason why he got my “yes.” He chose just the perfect spot for our first date at Sonya’s Garden in Tagaytay.

You may read more about it here: “It All Started At Sonya’s Garden”

2. I am very practical when buying stuff.

When I see what I need, I buy it and then I leave the mall. No kidding. 😀 So this explains why I only spend about an hour maximum to buy about 20 items I need inside the mall. I already know what I need so when I see them, I buy them.

I don’t spend so much time thinking about whether I should buy this or that or this one is better than the other. My husband is quite the opposite. 😉

There was even one time I teased him that he’s like a woman when buying stuff – we have scourged all the shops, all the colors, shapes, and sizes, and yet he still can’t find the one he likes. And that is only for one item. Oh, dear me. lol

I also have only the basic necessities at home from clothes to toiletries to make up. I overhaul clothes every 20 years. So the clothes that you saw me wearing 10 years ago, you’ll still see me wearing them now. lol And our bathroom, closets, and dressers still have lots of spaces in them.

Because, again, I am the low-maintenance girl who doesn’t need so much except a toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, and soap for toiletries; eyeliner, lipstick, face powder, and mascara for makeup; T-shirts and shorts that are mostly not branded for clothes.

I totally love wearing big shorts (hubby’s. lol) and big t-shirts and hubby will just tell me, “Hey, that’s my shirt.” Well, it’s mine now. 😀

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Outfit was stolen from hubby. 😉

But I also make a few exceptions when dressing up and I give in to society’s norms out of our love and respect for our families and friends during occasions. Like the photo below taken during my husband’s friend’s wedding last month:

Dressing up only for a day. 🙂

2018-08-30-01-20-30-867_edited

Ladylike for a day. 😉

But because I am practical me, would you believe if I tell you that this party dress belongs to my Mom and also my pumps? They are now 42 years old already (they’re 9 years older than me!). haha Yep, the dress was tailor-made but designed by Mom when she’s in her 30s around circa 1970s. You may check out this article for more of Mom’s vintage dresses. 😀

https://thejourneymansmoments.wordpress.com/2012/11/06/how-my-passion-for-art-and-fashion-came-to-be/

3. I am always after the quality of experience and never about the quantity of material possessions I get.

Any place where I’ll have immeasurable fun, adventure, and learning, that’s where you’ll find me. I love to get down and dirty literally with all the mud, the sweat, and the stink (the good kind). lol So I told my husband that when we have kids, our ideal family date is somewhere in the long trails of a mountain, a wide open field for biking, kite-flying, doing outdoor sports like frisbee, soccer, and a whole lot more of meaningful and yet free fun.

I have never been a fan of Time Zone or any “game zone” in the mall not only because I’m not a mall person but because it requires you to shell out cash to have an enjoyable experience. I’ve been on one because I indulged some of my companion’s wishes, but sadly, it wasn’t an enjoyable experience for me. I see it as some form of gambling like in a casino. Because for you to earn more (either cash or experience), you need to earn more chips and for you to have these chips, you need to purchase them.

But then, it all goes down to personal preferences and differences when it comes to interests and I respect that on other people. 🙂

I’ll end this low-maintenance article right here and I must say that again, it is a matter of personal preferences. Some guys may prefer high-maintenance women while some would prefer those who are just not squirmish about everything. 😉

You may also read this article for the low-cost date with ze husband last month on our anniversary date: https://thejourneymansmoments.wordpress.com/2018/09/20/how-to-pull-off-a-low-maintenance-date-our-r-a-v-e-experience/.

“And I want women to be modest in their appearance. They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves by the way they fix their hair or by wearing gold or pearls or expensive clothes.” – 1 Timothy 2:9

Always the low-maintenance woman,

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The Grey Thoughts

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Tin Ginete

Grey Areas

I cannot, for certain reasons, make myself read about “Mr. Grey.” No offense to those who take fancy and a general liking on the book. But I am afraid if its theme is to devalue women by means of female subordination and male chauvinism through eroticism, then I guess I am one with the thousands who are against it. I know for certain I will be coming up with a review regarding my disapproval on its general content criticizing how it primarily identifies women as sexual objects.

Would I be considered bias and a sexist if I’d rather choose to empower women in knowing their self-worth, boost their self-esteem and have that self-respect through Christ, their skills, God-given talents and capabilities and through them and them alone? And would it be wrong to go against the norms and assert my rights as a woman in a patriarchal system? Is it possible then to have a paradigm shift? They say that for a paradigm shift to take place, there has to be a change in mentality first. And for the latter, I believe culture has a huge role in it.

Back in college, majority of the classes I took are literary pieces that centered on feminism and women empowerment. And I’d like to give credit to some of the major novels we have discussed that made a great impact on me in terms of philosophical influences – possibly the main reason why I am rationalizing the way I do now.

I suggest the all-time classical movies – Jane Eyre; Little Women; Mona Lisa Smile and the more contemporary Eat, Pray, Love for good selections on what it means to be a woman. Great novels, they are.

Or better yet, read Proverbs 31. This last one, I highly recommend. 🙂

Dating Defined

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Before the “love month” ends, I thought I might post something related to matters of the heart which I normally don’t do. Thus, this article. 🙂

If you are to ask me about my thoughts on dating, I believe I have quite a set of ideas that are mostly not in tune with everyone’s ideas on dating. First, let’s define “dating.” The notion of dating is relative. Some of us view it as 2 persons going out together either to watch a movie, have dinner, etc., all leaning towards a romantic inclination – a relationship. Others simply define it as a casual hanging out similar to how they hang out with their friends.

I don’t believe in friendly dates like between a girl and a boy who do not know each other completely because yes, it may not be explicitly implied but the attraction is there since they both agreed to go out together for starters and yes, they are open to the notion that they would end up as a couple after some time. Again, because the attraction is there. You would not go out with someone you are not attracted to, would you?  😀 It is impossible to say let’s go out, let’s just have fun, just enjoy the time being together, etc. and only that.

There will be expectations. That’s a given. Expectations not regarding the person per se but more on how the date would end up. Like would you still go out with that person? Do you enjoy hanging out with that person? So friendly dates, for me, are a no-no, romantic dates would be better after you have been friends for a long time and have spent time together along with a group of friends. Intentions in romantic dates are laid out clear in the open, no room for wrong assumptions either on both parties.

This is another reason why I simply don’t go about dating any guy I like on friendly dates. Why? Because they are all automatically commoditized when you date one from the other thinking that because it did not work out with this one, I’ll just move on to the next.  Exactly the same as buying something from the market. It is definitely not a good way to start a relationship. Now, you most probably would wonder how, then, will I find out who is the right guy for me. Well, I may partly be a cynic at some point but I still believe in fate and faith (God’s plans), patience and waiting (God’s time). Who knows, I might find him while I am dating with my friends and within my circle of friends. 😀

How about the notion of love at first sight, then? Like I have never seen the guy before, never been friends with him and yet I fell in love with him at first sight? Tough question. Which would lead to another tough discussion I opt to stay away from – the definition of love. 😀

Nah, let’s just leave it all to the element of surprise. God’s wonders work in amazing ways, anyway. 🙂