Tag Archives: marriage

The Borrowed Life

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I am supposed to be bed resting. But when my body is at rest, my mind is at its best working double time. That’s why I sleep talk, because the brains just don’t want to stop working. Tsk, workaholic brains. *wink* It’s kind of creepy though if it is your first time to hear me sleep talk. I sometimes laugh out loud all of a sudden or sit down as if talking to someone invisible while asleep. My husband is always amused with this though. Because that means he has something to tease me in the morning. 🙂

Truth is, I am a little bit down under the weather for the past days. Actually a little bit is an understatement because I’ve been having migraines for the past days already – splitting ones. There is a striking pain in my lower back, too, and I have a painful jaw line or it’s my wisdom tooth still trying to come out (at my age, it seems weird). I really can’t tell but this wasn’t the first time I’ve experienced this. Prior to this, a splitting headache that went on for about a week bothered me last Christmas and New Year’s Day celebration along with mouth sores, a painful tooth/gum/jaw, and fatigue though I haven’t been doing much physically.

My assessment was that when my immune system is down, I experience these symptoms. During the holidays, there was a lot of stress preparing holiday stuff, then there’s heavy traffic and long queue everywhere. Now, it was the February “fever” as I only got about an hour of sleep, had to be on the road for about 2 hours and been awake for almost 24 hours to attend the hot air balloon festival as part of our Valentine’s Day celebration. The event was not too tiring and it was so much fun especially since it’s my husband’s first time to attend this event. But standing for very long hours under the very, very hot sun the whole day will no doubt drain you out.

I guess my immune system is down again so here comes the same symptoms. Most of them normally go away after some time, but somehow I’m a little bothered because they could be symptoms of an even severe illness. I did mention in my previous articles that my great grandmother, my grandmother, and my Mom are all breast cancer survivors.

My Mom was diagnosed with stage 2 cancer when she was 45 years old. She has been feeling chest pain for a couple of years already, but I guess my Mom just have this phobia with hospitals and doctors (white coat syndrome). It took my Aunties and my Dad a couple of years trying to convince her to have a medical check up.

By the way, all five of us, kids, were born with the help of a midwife only – yes, brave mom my Mom. She gave birth inside the comforts of our home with no anesthesia and medical staff to help her.

Being cancer survivors though, I guess this will be the reason why my Mom and my grandma are now called as the matriarchs of the family – an epitome of courage, strength and faith. And I believe my Dad’s prayers have something to do with it, too.

My Dad loves to go to church but because my Mom doesn’t want to, he decided to be with my Mom and chose to stay at home with her on Sundays. When I was a kid, I would go to my parents’ bedroom and I’d find my Dad sitting on the bed, with knees propped up, head bent down and hands clasped together – he was praying.

I was too young back then and I did not understand what it meant. I would sometimes play inside the room trying to get his attention and yes, distract him. But I ended up being ushered out of the room and reprimanded to never disturb him when he prays. So I asked him what he was doing, he answered simply with one word, “praying.”

It was this one word that healed my Mom and I believe this held my parents together as a couple during difficult and trying times. So now, I was beginning to wonder, “Is it my time now, Lord, to be in this situation too?” I am the only one among my siblings who didn’t undergo a mammogram. I am 30 years old and these are the years when hormones start to change and yes, cancer cells are getting more aggressive. I don’t want to have a check up for two reasons: 1) I don’t want to hear that dreaded line that “You have cancer.” and 2) I have faith that God would heal me I wouldn’t be needing doctors and medications.

Reason number 2 is somehow void. Why? There was one lecture in church wherein our pastor told us that faith healing is really possible but there is also a purpose why God created doctors and why technology made medicines possible. Jesus, our Healer, is not present with us to perform healing miracles. And yet I believe that along with our faith, it is also through the doctors that He passed on this responsibility to heal on His behalf. So yes, I might have a medical check up next week. I also just found out that the pills I am taking can enhance the growth of cancer cells and are not prescribed to those who have a history of cancer. So, this definitely requires a consultation with my ob gynecologist.

I am not afraid to die. I am, in fact, very much looking forward to the day that I will die regardless on how I will die. Why? Nothing is ever more beautiful and rewarding than meeting your Creator yourself. I have so many questions to ask God regarding His awesome wonders that not even Science or any branch of study can ever explain. Just imagine how awesome it would be to hear the answers straight from the Master, Himself, face to face. Oh, that would be such a wonderful privilege. It is wisdom that comes with no price for it is priceless. And yet it is not my intent to know everything that God knows for no one can ever be like God – He is the Alpha and the Omega, no one and nothing compares.

I am ready but my loved ones are not – my husband most especially. I prayed to God about this that if time comes all my assumptions are right, I pray that He would prepare me and most especially my loved ones for the truth. The truth hurts, it always does. But the good thing is that it sets all of you free. Nothing is ever more painful to me than seeing my loved ones hurt. Being the overly empathetic person that I am, I feel every pain they feel and their emotional burden is my burden too. And sometimes I ask God why He created me that way.

For there were times like during last Sunday’s service wherein my husband and I were seated behind a young lady and a middle-aged woman. During praise and worship, I saw the young lady bowed down with her hair covering her face but her hand is up her cheek – I know what she is doing even if I don’t see it because I feel it – she is wiping tears from her eyes. The pain is there. The middle-aged woman also sat down during worship, stayed silent as if praying a prayer and then took a hankie from her bag and wiped her eyes.

Sometimes seeing them that way makes me want to hug them because I can feel their pain and when they cry, I want to cry with them too. The only times I cried in church though were during my altar call and the baptism of the Holy Spirit. When I saw these two women, I knew I had to do something at that point. So I laid my hands out in their direction during praise and worship and uttered a prayer of healing. I felt like I wanted to tell them silently in my head that “My dear sister, though you are in so much pain now, the Lord will heal you. The fact that you are in front of me and worshiping the Lord in this church means that He has chosen you to be among His people – the ones that He has saved. Be brave for you may not realize it now, but you are more than a conqueror. And this is just the beginning of your journey with the Lord. Be glad and take heart, what you are going through is only temporary.”

It would be really nice to approach and talk to them after the church service, but I am a stranger to them so that might be awkward. I am still praying though that even after the end of the church service, this silent encounter of mine with them will never end there. This wasn’t the first time this have happened. In fact, it happens all the time during church service.

And sometimes I really am baffled because knowing the emotional being that I am, being close to these people seems like me being a sponge and I absorb anything that is around me – and the emotions are all heavy. Ah yes, a call for more prayers on my part. I am more than glad and willing though to be of service by being a prayer warrior. Anything for God and His people – nothing is ever more honorable than that. 🙂

Now, back to the cancer cells, I started talking to my husband about it as my way of preparing him for what could possibly happen. I told him that when I am diagnosed with cancer, I want him to live with his Mom because I don’t want him to see me in pain and suffering. And yet he would just shrug it off and will not welcome the idea that he will lose me early on in our lives together. He would tell me that it will never happen. I would just smile at him and told him that there is a 99.9% chance it will happen. It is only a matter of “when.”

I just want him to be prepared when that happens so he wouldn’t blame God as to why it is happening to me or to us. I told him that God has a good reason for allowing things to happen to those whom He has called according to His purpose. I could die early, but we are all going to die anyway. It’s all just a matter of who gets to die first and who gets to die last.

To be honest, it really doesn’t matter if I live in this world for 99 years or for 30 years. For we all know that this life is only temporary. It is only a preparation for the real world wherein everything is good, there is no death, and life is infinite – eternal life in heaven. For all those who believe in God and proclaimed Jesus as their Savior will all meet and gather one day in that one special place along with our Creator. So I continued telling my husband that if I die early, he should be a good man and continue living a Godly life so he’d be with me, too, when he dies and we’d still end up together. There was silence.

Oh my dear husband of mine, must you always sleep on me while I am still talking? lol *wink* But do understand that these lengthy speeches of mine and weird questions happen quite late in the evening and he’s so tired from work. He is lukewarm about everything while I am so passionate about everything especially with my faith and yet by the end of the day, he ends up believing me. 😀

No credit to me but credit to God for making the impossible possible – even melting the coldest of hearts to become warm. Though I must admit that there are days when my husband and I seem like the worst of enemies. Nothing is sweeter though than him hugging you tight and showering you with kisses even though you look terrible with puffed eyes because of the pain you’re experiencing. And along with the hugs came a remark that says, “Honey, no matter how difficult it is what we are going through now, I will never leave you.” Ahhh yes, these are the moments I so appreciate having a husband – a lovely gift from God. Never mind the “dark days.” They weren’t meant to be remembered. 😉

I should be asleep by now, but I thought I need to finish this first. Being stubborn is what I inherited from my Mom but God is changing that, too. So tonight, as I stare at the ceiling lying in bed, I will raise my hand to worship God. My hand belongs to Him as with all parts of my body. They will all be wrinkled or they will become ashes and yet I can only rejoice when that happens. For it signifies the time to be nearer and closer to my God, my Father and my Creator, and be with my Savior, Jesus Christ, from whom this body originally and rightfully belongs to.

Indeed, this life that I have is only a borrowed life. 🙂

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” – Psalm 73:26

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The Perfect GIF

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Nope, it is not a wrong spelling. And yes,  you are reading it right. GIF. Not GIFT. 🙂

Because what I will be sharing is not your usual GIF or Graphics Interchange Format file – something extraordinary. Well, because we have a God who is extraordinaire.

Since I just recently got married, I was researching online about the laws in our Philippine constitution regarding changing of surnames for the wives. And found out we have 3 options under Article 370 of RA 386 lifted from the website of the Philippine Commission on Women:

(1) Her maiden first name and surname and add her husband’s surname, or

(2) Her maiden first name and her husband’s surname or

(3) Her husband’s full name, but prefixing a word indicating that she is his wife, such as “Mrs.”

I was able to find this out in another blog (indeed, praise God for blogs because sharing became endless) wherein I also came across this animated graphic about none other than but faith.

This animated graphic is what believers commonly call as “The Bridge” illustration. It basically summarizes the Christian faith under the verse Romans 6: 23 –

“For the wages of sin is death but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

God_Man_Sin_Blue 200

I was so grateful that out of the billions of blogs all over the world, I stumbled on this one blog, that also speaks much about faith though my original purpose is something that is not related to faith. Or maybe it is, I mean, my marriage is a blessing from God.

Unfortunately, I cannot trace the copyright of this file thus I just made this article not just to share about it but also as a disclaimer that the GIF file is not mine and a link to the blog where I originally copied it is posted in this article.

However, I believe that God did not intend I stumble upon it for nothing. Everything has a purpose, even the tiniest particle in this world. I just felt that this GIF needs to be shared – thanks to the maker/s of this animated graphic.

Thus, if you are a blogger or a site owner, you can attach this in your page like what I did. Or if you just want to share it on social media, just right-click the image and select “Save Image As” and you’re ready to share it as long as you attach a disclaimer that the image is not yours and origin is unknown or you can trace it back to the blog where I’ve taken it from.

This will be my first article for December, posted on the first day of December, the month when the world commemorates the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ – a symbol of God’s love towards humanity.

Share the ❤ my dearest folks!

How It Feels To Be A Rome

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Most definitely you are wondering how can a person be a place at the same time. Or maybe thought that I made a grammatical error there putting the word “Rome” instead of “Roman.” Or mistakenly put the article “a”  instead of “in.”

Well, I guess this is part of the perks of being married to a man whose surname is spelled similarly to that of the capital of Italy. The only difference is that the surname is usually pronounced as /roh-me/ or ro:me.

This article though is not about my new surname per se but more of being a Mrs. Rome – the real deal. And of course, to commemorate our first monthsary as a married couple. Just a glimpse on how we fared as a newlywed couple since a lot are asking how it is so far with us. 🙂

Two different personalities living in one roof. Yes, basically any married couple will agree to this. We completely have opposite personalities and backgrounds. And funny it is that all the married couple I know who have been married for quite some time now also possess the same opposite personalities. My Mom and Dad’s relationship is the closest example I have.

At night my husband easily gets cold, I prefer it colder. So we don’t share a blankie. Though when it gets really cold and I am sure I am about to freeze to death, there goes my “human fireplace.” 😉

I am a night owl and wakes up late, he is an early riser and sleeps early. Now, this is really amusing. Because you can imagine me in bed at 9pm, which is the start of my “creative hour,” so there I am lying beside him tinkering with none other than the most handy gadget of everyone, the cellphone – writing a blog post, editing a photo on IG, reading articles and new recipes to try, listing down my things-to-do, and a whole lot of other things. Yes, that is how a phone is essential to me lately. He doesn’t like it sleeping alone so that’s where I come in to keep him company.

But here’s the bad part. I don’t like it waking up early because well, I slept late. 😀 But he wakes up early because he sleeps early. He is all “clownish” and kiddie-like in the early hours of the morning, hyperactive, energetic and all and there’s me grumpy and grunting every time he would disturb my sleep. But I had to cook him breakfast and well, I love him being the happy him, so I just make up all the lost sleep I had when he leaves for work.

One very obvious opposite though that we had a hard time dealing with, as it really is far too obvious to dismiss, is my being obsessive compulsive and him being laid back. I am always on the go doing anything that I can while he loves to take such great time in doing everything. I loved everything spic and span while he loves to just put things wherever he wishes to. And the long list goes on and on. 😀 I’ll be sharing more about how we dealt with this in the latter part of this article.

Another is managing our quirkiness like he removes the skin of a fried eggplant whereas I ate everything; I drink half a cup of any vinegar sauce/dip while he watches me with mouth agape. And we let it stayed that way. I mean, it doesn’t harm any of us when we do it. But I really wonder what is the difference of removing the skin of a fried eggplant when he eats the skin of an eggplant in a soup? Probably the same way he is wondering what joy/health benefits can I derive from drinking vinegar sauce. The best thing to do really is to let those quirky stuff about one another stay as they are. They are what makes us unique. 😉

We have opposite interests too that seem to complement like he plays the drums, I play the guitar. He wants to learn how to play the guitar, I want to learn how to play the drums, we want each other to teach one another – we don’t have the time. So yup, we kind of complement each other there having no time at all. 😀

We do have our common interests too like we were so engrossed watching the previous episodes of The Walking Dead at night that we suddenly realized it’s been more than a week since we had our cuddling and romance time. Yes, forsaking romance over a TV show. We just laughed at the idea for we both know cuddling and romance time will always be there. Well, as it is written in the bible, everything has its own perfect time. 🙂

Those were some of our personality differences and commonalities. Here comes the adjustment period or what we commonly know as “compromises” or meeting halfway. And just a heads up, it really is not as easy and as simple as it sounds. This is where the true test of character and faith in God enters in.

We grew up in different family backgrounds, system of values and upbringing which includes personal relationships with our parents and our siblings. Mine was sort of the traditional, reserved and independent kind while they are more of the intimate, really close and dependent with one another kind. This became a big struggle for us both especially on his part as the time has come he has to let go of those attachments and I know it will never be easy. I already made this letting go of attachments when I came here in Manila to study in college and left my parents in Bicol after the first 16 years of my life growing up with them. It was also a tough decision to make but I had to do it, my parents had to do it. It was painful, it wasn’t easy. There will be tears, there will be heartaches and my husband had to deal with it just now.

It took me a while to understand that, like how my siblings were patient with me when I dealt with my homesickness. I, too, should offer the same kind of sympathy, understanding and patience to him. Sometimes conflicts would arise because of this – but God’s grace always intervene enabling us both to consider what really matters at the moment. He helped both me and my husband understand what needs to be understood, what needs to be accepted and what needs to go. Slowly, the changes happened bit by bit and will continue to happen. It is all a question of who should we honor in this relationship – you, me, them or God?

Adjusting to one’s personality is difficult. That is why I would always explain to my husband that it is true what was shared in the Marriage Preparation seminar in church that it is best for newlywed couples to have their own “kingdom” because if it is already difficult for two different personalities to live in one roof, imagine if you are staying with your families, that will be multiple personalities in one roof – it will call for a major clash and chaos.

Sometimes there will come a time wherein adjustments, changes, and compromises do not come as you wish them to be. You have to prepare yourself for deviations, unfulfilled tasks or obligations and unmet expectations – a lot of those will happen which will fuel heated arguments, sleepless nights, crying spells and sadness. BUT take note that they should only happen for a certain duration of time. My brother and Mom told me that both you and your spouse have the choice to make the marriage work at ALL costs and it is only through your joint efforts that you can change the course of your marriage from something bad to something good. Well, it always has been a rocky start for any newlyweds. That is why my husband and I resorted to one best weapon to protect our marriage – PRAYERS.

We have both decided to make it part of our daily tasks to pray during the night before sleeping and in the morning when we wake up. I get to pray at night since he is already tired from work, and he gets to pray in the morning because I am still sleepyhead at that time. 😉

Indeed, I can say that prayers are really so powerful that it never ever, ever failed to lift us up each and every single day. We would notice that when we skip even just one night or morning without a prayer, things don’t go as well as they should be. The attacks of the enemy are greater. So we made a promise that even if it is so tempting to just lie down and not pray or just skip praying and hurry going to work, CHOOSE TO PRAY.

And there really is something about praying that moves the Spirit within us. It always leaves you amazed. For example when we pray, we don’t usually talk what we would pray about, we just leave all of the praying to the person in charge. This way, we let the Spirit lead the prayer. And sometimes when it is my husband praying, I just want to cry at the middle of it. Because he would pray EXACTLY about the things that my heart wanted to pray for. They were not things about the marriage per se so I wonder how could he possibly know that that was what I wanted to pray too. So yes, after the prayer, there I was with a huge smile ready to greet him when he looks up. And when you say “Thank You,” you know that you are not only thanking the person in front of you who prayed for you both, but you are also saying your gratitude to the Spirit within him who made him utter that prayer.

And I have also proven the fact why men were appointed by God to be spiritual leaders. My husband prays very concise prayers while I, being the multitasker woman, with neurons simultaneously working with one another, I forget what I am praying in the middle of my prayer. UGH.

Ugh indeed. 😀 It is a good thing my husband has been listening attentively to what I am praying, so when I asked him what was I praying about with all the giggling and the laughing, he would tell me where I stopped – with all the serious look on his face. 😀

This makes me stop giggling, say my apologies and resume praying. I admit that it is very embarrassing. But how can I help it – me being the amnesia girl always and a lot of things going on in my mind always. Indeed, it is a matter of male and female brains – the male brain was created to focus and be good at one task while the female brain was made to be good with a lot of tasks but not so good in each of them. Men know how to decompartmentalize, while with us, women, well it is all chaos. 😉

Here’s an example. I asked him to chop the ingredients we need for a meal I am cooking. And when I saw it, he got to finish it half the time I usually spend to finish it and he does it with the perfect cuts. I, on the other hand, I get to cook in one stove, prepare the table, wash the rice but with some mistakes here and there.

This is where he becomes my superhero/knight-in-shining-armor Adonis. He does some of the tasks that I can no longer accommodate with the heaps that I am currently doing or about to do. Like after cooking, he does the washing of the dishes. Or if I wash the laundry, he irons the clothes. Like there is one time that though I have listed all the ingredients I needed for a meal, I still missed one important ingredient. So there he went out the door buying that one ingredient. Good thing there is a nearby market from where we live. 😀

This wasn’t all too easy for him, the chores I mean. Since they grew up wherein everything was done for them even until now – from cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. But that was how they were raised so I needed to respect that and yet as my partner, I would need him to help me out with the chores too. I grew up the opposite wherein I learned things quite early in my teens and doing them now is just a piece of cake for me. So the adjustment there was me, handling a bit of an extra work load, as there will now be two persons living in the house instead of only me while he gets to slowly learn how to do things here at home. It required both of us to really exert all the patience, understanding and endurance that we could muster.

And yet God reminded us to do everything with love not as if you are doing it for men but for God. 🙂

I am just grateful though that even if the schedule now for me is pretty hectic balancing everything here at home from budgeting to chores, to reading articles, doing research for my thesis, plan meals, etc. my cooking did not suffer – this is what I dread the most. 😀 I admit I am no very good cook although I do know how to cook. But after getting married, I now was given this responsibility to serve good and delicious meals to my husband and my future family. And if I’d be too tired already, I know I wouldn’t be able to serve the best meals. But because everything should be done with love, the output contains love. 😉

It is enough compliment to see your husband munching and gobbling his food away, texting you after breakfast saying his gratitude for a hearty, delicious breakfast and for taking good care of him and this last one, which I really laughed out loud when he told me this:

“Honey, please don’t cook food that good so we won’t get fat as I don’t go to the gym anymore.” 

Now that really cracked me up. I was having hysterics when he told me that and even more when he said that he really was serious. I mean, how do I cook bad food?! 😀 I did not learn how to cook just so it would taste bad. LOL But oh well, that is my sweet husband back there – yup, my sweet, completely opposite partner in life. 🙂

So the question I asked was, do we have to be really completely the same to get along?

This is where God comes in. If God wanted us to be the same, He would have created us with the same personalities. But we all know that that was not part of God’s universal design. No single creature in this world is the same, not even identical twins. I guess we can settle in the fact that God intended it to be that way because He created each and every one of us unique and beautiful in its own way.

A marriage demands patience, understanding, endurance and most of all forgiveness. A marriage is not about yourself anymore, but more about the other person you married. It is all about giving and never about getting. The most important thing is respect to one another and the differences you have and the willingness to adjust to a routine, agreement or compromise that is comfortable to both of you. I just want to share what we have learned in the Marriage Preparation seminar for it really comes handy when the need arises.

“3. Being united to your spouse requires Christ-like attitudes:

  • When a habit irritates, choose MERCY.
  • When a hindrance frustrates, choose GRACE.
  • When a hurt grieves, choose FORGIVENESS.”

There will be heated arguments, disagreements, failures and mistakes because a marriage is about two imperfect and broken people being joined by God’s Grace. God’s Grace and protection thru prayers will lead the marriage. For God is love and love is God. Without God in the marriage, it is impossible to give our spouses the love that they deserve.

God intends to teach a married couple only two things: for the husband, leadership and for the wife, submission. 🙂

As a wife, I have a lot of questions, fears, doubts and worries. And yet God would always assure me to never worry about tomorrow but just listen intently to what God instructs you to do for today, for the moment.

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” – Matthew 6:34

P.S.

You will never learn the nitty gritty details on how it is to build and protect your own family without the wisdom shared by the families you came from. I love my family and my husband’s family and I wish to honor them as one of God’s appointed blessings in ushering us in our married life. 🙂

On Civil Weddings and Believers

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I’d like to start this article by saying that my civil wedding posed a lot of interesting questions based on two grounds:

  1. I am a devoted believer.
  2. The assumption that I am yoked to an unbeliever.

The following two questions are the frequently asked and I believe it is just right that these questions popped up for a lot have been under the cloud as to what really is what, causing some to stumble in their faith which, as believers, we are not supposed to do to others. I admit I, myself, am being corrected each and every single day. And I mean, each and every single day. So these questions and the answers to them are a breather to me as well. 🙂

First question:

“If you get married through a civil wedding, does that make your marriage unholy or a sin?”

Second question:

“How would you know if your future spouse is a believer or not?”

For the first question, we were already informed during our Engagement/Wedding Preparation seminar in church by our pastors that there is nothing wrong being married through a civil wedding. Tradition, which is cultural, and social norms (which can be a misconception) imply that a couple be wed in church with all the grandiosity of the entourage and the reception. I intend to share this in another article for I did find a lot of blogs of unhappy brides during their grand, dream weddings.

I cannot claim expertise on this matter and our pastors only shared a few insights as to why it is okay to get married through a civil wedding but I did find this article on one of my favorite websites when it comes to dealing with familial and relational issues Christian-wise.

I highly recommend you to read this article and read more related articles in their site as they were all insightful:

http://family.custhelp.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/26434/~/a-christian-view-of-civil-marriage

And also this one:

http://family.custhelp.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/26208/related/1/session/L2F2LzEvdGltZS8xNDQwODM3MTQzL3NpZC9BNVI2TDZ2bQ%3D%3D

For the second question, I honestly admit I struggled with this in the early stages of my relationship with my husband back when we were still dating. And I believed I made two common mistakes that believers do unknowingly: judge and condemn. Reading this article came as a rebuke. And if you are to read my previous articles too, you will know that the Spirit also made the rebuke through the Scripture and selected bible verses that are truly answers to questions and doubts I have been brooding over for a time. I hope to share this article with you as again, I cannot claim any expertise on this matter as I am no minister or theologian, I am just a writer who writes from her soul. 😉

This is a very long read but please do take time to carefully read through the important points:

http://www.concordant.org/expohtml/TheEvangel/WhatIsABeliever.html

And since I have posted articles here written by people I do not personally know, I’d like to post a disclaimer that it is best to read through all of them with the guidance of the Spirit. And by the end of the day, it is still the Scripture that we should rely more for Godly wisdom. But these articles were written by people who also composed the body of Christ and I believe they were also called to do the mission/task that God has appointed to them. As my brother would always say,

“It is always a matter of faith. It has been and always will be.”

And for my personal advice as a sister in Christ, I recommend consistent praying and undying faith will lead you to where God would want you to be. I had a lot of fears, I used to, had a little bit now but this is what God particularly assured me for my relationship with my husband now (shared this revelation in my previous articles):

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” – 1 John 4:18

Tin Ginete

08/17/2015 – Sealing The Commitment

Hold on to God, hold on to His Word, seek His counsel and as one brother in Christ of mine advised, “overload yourself with prayers.”  What matters is the commitment – honor the commitment, honor the decision you made out of love for your partner, honor your God-given free will when you used it to make that decision, then you honor God.

Of course, I am looking forward and very much excited to have our church wedding wherein all our beloved families and friends are complete to witness our re-affirmation of wedding vows to God officiated by a minister this time. 🙂

P.S.

What was so funny during our civil wedding ceremony was that we were told by the clerk that our signatures were almost similar. When we looked at the marriage certificate, we can’t help but agree.

AND I really wonder why I decided, decades ago, to use this signature of mine which is so, so far from my initials. It doesn’t look like a letter “C” or letter “L” or even a “G.” My husband’s signature looked closer to his initials though. Oh well, the wonders and the mysteries never end, do they? 😉

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” – 1 Corinthians 13:13

Leaving and Cleaving in A Marriage

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Photo credit: hayatimagazine.com

Photo credit: hayatimagazine.com

Yes, marriage is one of the greatest fundamentals in our society. Without it, a lot of things will not be made possible – a healthy and loving home, propagation of future descendants who will become future leaders, thinkers, world changers and responsible citizens of the society, among a whole lot of other relevant things.

That is why this word “marriage”  is really not just about papers and agreements, romance and “I love yous” – it is more than that.

Since I am in this season of God preparing me for marriage, I would like to share an article written by singer/song writer Richard Poon and wife actress Maricar Reyes-Poon which my fiance and I also learned in our Marriage Preparation Seminar in church.

“Leave and Cleave 1: Why Living Beside Your Parents Is Bad For Your Wife”

Learning the theories is a must, application is the biggest challenge. Thus, prayer to God is your best tool. 🙂

Tin Ginete

The “Promise” Rings

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(Disclaimer: This is a very long post but definitely worth the read.) 🙂

I believe many are already familiar what promise rings are. But in case some of you still are unfamiliar with it, this is a definition I got from Wikipedia:

“A Promise ring symbolizes a commitment to a promise and is given to a person as a token or reminder of his/her decision…”

But I guess what we could highlight in this definition is this: commitment to a promise.

But before I get on to that, do allow me to share just a quick update regarding my current status. If you have been one of my avid readers, you would know by now that my fiance and I decided to take a two-week “cool off” period wherein we were back to being single and strangers? Definitely not. For God was faithful enough to have kept our communication going and again, not let our hearts be hardened by the negative circumstances that we went through.

We haven’t had the time to personally talk things out and just prayed to God to guide us through the week so we could re-align our plans and our thoughts with His. I shared in my previous articles that during the Mid-Year Prayer and Fasting, I asked God for assurances if the decisions and the commitments I have made were indeed according to His will.

It was hard to let go of a person you love so much, but when God asks you to, you have no choice but to obey just like what Abraham did when he was ready to sacrifice his son’s (Isaac) life. You don’t know in that moment of decision-making why God asked you to. But if you are to ask me if indeed it was what God wanted, I can answer with “yes” for the decision came during our Mid-Year Prayer and Fasting.

And yet during those 3 days of Prayer and Fasting, I also asked God if I should let him go completely or was it something temporary, a “breather” so that the two of us could see His beautiful promise and not drown ourselves in the multitude of conflicts we are having – sort of a reminder where our relationship should be going and how we should be loving each other, God’s way.

Came the sign which I shared in my More Revelations (Part 2) article about my fiance’s name. All I had at that time were prayers and my faith and all that ever mattered to me was conversing with my God and nothing else. Yet, I have put my trust and hopes in God and God alone.

Two weeks passed.

In those two weeks, I was more in tune to the Spirit’s leading. Revelations upon revelations, tangible assurances, more Godly wisdom, more of God’s wonders working anywhere and anytime, everything was all about God. I was able to experience freedom by the end of the Mid-Year Prayer and Fasting, answers were given, Godly wisdom on generational curses, learning about what was plaguing me for the past years without me realizing it, until eventually this word popped out – fear.

Fast forward to last weekend, my fiance asked me for a chance to talk things out personally. I always declined saying we should wait upon God for His right time. I thought about seeking counsel from my first spiritual mentor, my brother, and this was his advice:

Tin Ginete

Brotherly advice from a brother in Christ and my brother for real. 😉

I listened to my brother and continued praying until came the time when my fiance asked me again if he could see me last Saturday, to which I said “yes.” We were able to talk some matters over the phone the past days but I know there are still more that were left unsaid, more that need to be said and more that are better said in person.

An out-pour of prayers came, we met and then came the moment of that big question: “Are you really ready in your heart for this commitment, this big commitment which is marriage?”

Both our answers were a “yes.” The agreement was then mutual. Apologies were said and accepted, love overruled. So there we were continuing on from where we ended. When I made this re-commitment, I felt that I was making a pledge that indeed, no matter what happens, like what my brother said, there’s no more backing out. Fight for faith, continue hoping and most especially fight for love.

I have always believed that God planned everything, and I mean everything from the smallest details and the mundane to the biggest and the marvelous. This includes dates and numbers.

For the date, I thought there must be something to the date when I felt I was ready to talk with my fiance or should I say, it was already God’s perfect time. I am aware that the enemy is also working full time to destroy what God’s plans are. And of course, we all know that the holy matrimony is one of God’s best creations. For in a holy marriage and through marriages future disciples and spiritual leaders are born. But I know for sure as well that God won’t allow a marriage to fall apart if He allowed the union to be part of His even greater plans.

So why Saturday, July 12, 2015?

Okay, I remembered. I was just this total amnesia girl that I forgot it was the day before our 18th monthsary as a couple. 😀

“Praise be to God”  was all I could blurt out. What a beautiful way to reconcile. Indeed, there is always something to celebrate after God gave us some time away from our troubles so we could appreciate the beauty that God has created in our relationship. The first week that we had our “break time,”  his engagement proposal happened. Yesterday was our 18th monthsary, July 12 – what an awesome, wonderful way to celebrate it. I need not ask for any gift or special way to celebrate it, except I could only offer in return a heart full of gratitude to my Father up above who wished for nothing else but a better life for His sons and daughters.

So the day ended with a smile. I slept with a peaceful heart. 

Early Sunday morning, July 12, our monthsary day, I suddenly woke up. I felt the need to urinate. So down I went, drank a glass of water and headed upstairs. When I got back to bed, I was so wide awake as if I haven’t slept at all. I checked the clock, it’s 3:03am. Wow, that is the same time for the past months that I wake up every now and then and could not sleep for no apparent reason at all. The very recent prior to this was the night before I broke up with my fiance and thought I heard someone calling my name. It was during that moment that I contemplated and decided to let him go.

But this time it was different. Here I was in bed staring at the ceiling with a smile on my lips reminiscing the events that happened the day before. Yes, I thought maybe because I just cannot contain my happiness that my fiance and I were back together. Then a phrase just popped up in my head all of a sudden – “real love drives out fear.”

Okay, now where did that come from? It was not even connected to my current thought – recalling yesterday’s events. And the phrase sounded right but not really right to me. But I was sure I have heard or read it somewhere, somehow. So what I did, I grabbed my phone, turned my WiFi on and searched ever reliable Google with the phrase/sentence. And the search results centered on only one thought – a bible verse which says:

1 John 4:18 ESV

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”

Okay, so that explained why it popped up – I definitely have read this before but my synapses could not just particularly locate that memory bank where I stored it. But thank God for technology, I can easily locate those lost memories by giving me something to remember them through more additional information and clues.

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And I smiled even more when upon seeing the search results, the top 3 sources that came up were from the ministries that I highly look up to as a Christian: Joyce Meyer, Rick Warren and Desiring God. I don’t believe in coincidences and I believe God has a reason for waking me up at this hour. So I started reading all 3 articles by said authors and I found 3 words common in all 3 articles: perfect love, God’s love and fear.

Allow me to share some of the screenshots I took for documentation purposes and do take note of the time. For I will be sharing more revelations in the succeeding paragraphs.

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Joyce Meyer

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Rick Warren

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Desiring God

But going back to the bible verse, I was having my dose of Godly wisdom when a question popped in my head again: “why does it have to be “real love”? Usually, for the bible verses, most of the time I get the phrases correct especially if they are the usual bible verses that I have been encountering during devotion time. 1 John 4:18 was not an exemption for I have read it quite a couple of times already. And yet what was with the phrase “real love?” Where did it come from? I am sure I have encountered it somewhere too, something that has quite that significance to me for me to be able to somehow store it in my long term memory but could not point out exactly where.

Then came the “Eureka!” moment and I almost laughed aloud. For this was where I have seen it and now I know why it was retained because it is that significant. The following is a photo of the “dummy” rings that my fiance and I bought a couple months back as during the Marriage Preparation seminar we attended in church, we were advised to use “dummy” rings in the actual wedding ceremony as the real thing might be misplaced and eventually lose them because of all the preparations and the hectic activities lined up for the said event. It was the first thing that we bought and we really don’t know why back then. 😀

I was actually the one who suggested we buy the rings when I browsed online for wedding rings. And I know it was not a coincidence that I felt the urge though I do not know why. But I acted upon it and I believe it was not also a coincidence when came the time that my fiance and I were choosing what ring design would best fit us and this particular design came into our hands. My first choice was a glittery ring but when my fiance tried it, his feminine, slim hands, looked REALLY feminine. So, it was a no-no for us.

The second choice was a plain silver band but then again there’s no available size for my fiance. Then this was the point that the shop owner suggested another pair. I didn’t like it at first. Because I wanted the rings to just have a clean and simple finish since it’s just going to be a “dummy” ring. I mean, it wouldn’t really matter for what matters would be our actual wedding rings. But then again, this pair was the only pair wherein the wedding ring for the groom fitted my fiance’s ring finger just right. And one more thing, I don’t like rings with inscriptions at the outer side of the ring. Well, let’s say I am still a bit old fashioned when it comes to these things. 😀

But in the end, I conceded that we buy this design with an inscription engraved at the outer side of the ring and an engraving of one half of a heart for each ring between the inscription. If you combine the rings, it’ll form into the shape of a heart.

Tin Ginete

“Real Love”

The rings weren’t significant to me for they are just “dummies.” BUT I was wrong – totally wrong. For now, I felt like they are the most important rings we will ever wear. Why?

Going back to the “real love” phrase, I was just amazed when I remembered that this was the inscription engraved on the “dummy” rings. And what was even more amazing was that the revelation with the verse and my interchanging “perfect love” with “real love”  was God’s way of reminding me of His promise to me and Brian – marriage. He wanted me to realize that this is real/perfect love – it drives out fear.

Fear.

Now it dawned on me. This was not about fears in my past, fears in my childhood days but fears that I was unaware I have been bringing in the relationship with my fiance. It was out of fear that we had the conflicts. It was out of fear of the punishments from the past mistakes. It was out of fear of so many things that eventually came to me fearing the worst that could happen in our relationship. It was fear that ruled the relationship.

And this was a portion of the article that made me see the clarity of it all:

Screenshot_2015-07-12-04-21-05

God pulled us out of the relationship to protect us from our own fears and gave us hope instead. God wanted to teach us that that was not how He intended our relationship to be. Because fear did not come from Him. Reading the articles further just brought me once again in that state of utmost humility – being humbled by God’s presence through the revelations.

God’s presence.

This made me think about once again the idea of me waking up at around 3am and why the number 3 proved to be very significant to me like the day of my salvation which was 3/3/13 (which I shared in my previous articles) and was always included in His bigger revelations. Was it God? Did it come from an angel? I was still baffled and yet I know there’s an explanation somehow behind it. So I typed at Google search once again and checked out if there is somehow a biblical significance with the number 3 and the time. The following were the search results that turned up:

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The 3 is always there – even my bookmarks came down to 3.

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The Prophetic News

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The Prophetic News

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The Prophetic News

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There really is something about names. Mine is Christine. 🙂

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Spirit Daily

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Spirit Daily

This was another big revelation. Although the moment I read that 3am is also the time where Satan is at work, came the terrifying fear that I might be possessed by a demon or vulnerable of being possessed. Because I admit I do experience some waking up moments at around 3am feeling a heavy feeling in my heart. But for the recent events, they were mostly uplifting and enlightening.

BUT I think my God went before me, for He knows I will seek for answers and He already assured me through the bible verse I have mentioned above. As the article mentioned, the Spirit commanded him to stand on His Word. Fear does not come from God. So most likely, Satan was also trying to butt in. But sorry, not sorry that I am already protected by my loving God. 🙂

I just felt the need to browse a little more and stumbled across a forum regarding the biblical significance of 3am. And one comment just struck me the most:

Screenshot_2015-07-12-05-40-09

Yes, I believe it was and is all for a greater calling. A calling that involves a greater harvest. A calling that calls for a preparation towards a significant event. Our God is calling out.

And I believe in my church, our spiritual leaders have already prophesied this. For yesterday’s prayer, led by a sister in Christ who is also a spiritual leader, was all about fear. I really don’t believe in coincidence. 😉

So with that I rest my case, and I am just smiling even more as I type this. For it was one of my prayers to God to give me a bible verse during my wedding that is not the usual bible verse I encounter during Christian weddings such as:

1 John 4:19 ESV

“We love because He first loved us.”

So He gave me a different verse instead – a verse that will have a personal significance and impact not just to me, but a verse that will seal the commitment of what “real love” should be for both me and my fiance along with a symbol of that commitment – the “promise” rings.

It was not just a promise/reminder/covenant between me and my fiance to commit to each other until death do us part but most importantly, it symbolizes God’s beautiful promise for us both – God’s advance wedding gift to us. And this reminds me of The God Triangle:

Photo credit: thewerners.org

Photo credit: thewerners.org

Now this is perfect/real love: love is God and God is love. So yes, basically, I just can’t help but thank my God every single day for literally E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. ❤

P.S.

My chosen bible verse for the wedding was not because I chose it but God chose it for me and it was the verse that came just before 1 John 4:19. So I believe it still is in the context of bible verses perfect for Christian weddings. 😉

Here’s a video about God restoring what was lost if we seek Him FIRST.

And here’s a text from him tonight, nothing can ever make me smile the sweetest except when I see the word “pray.” 😀

Tin Ginete

Our God is indeed a God who restores and redeems. 🙂

A Letter To My Father

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This is my biological Dad. Happy Father’s Day, Daddy! 🙂

This post may be a tad late for the Father’s Day celebration, but I was led by the Spirit to write this now. And I believe this will testify to yet another living testimony of God’s grace and love that run throughout all the generations of this world and the generations to come.

I am confident that downloading the movie The Shawshank Redemption (1994) from my brother’s hard drive two days ago where I got this inspiring quote from is not a choice by chance.

“I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up DOES rejoice.” – Red, The Shawshank Redemption

This was followed by a leading to one article I read while browsing in my Facebook news feed entries yesterday entitled 10 Songs To Strengthen Your Marriage which was a breather after going through quite some rough challenges lately when it comes to relational issues. It then finally led me to reading about the author of the article and her favorite Christian movies, one of them is Letters To God (2010).

I was prodded to watch it as I haven’t seen it and after crying buckets of tears and silently praying to God in my heart since I totally can relate to every scene in the movie, I was prompted to write this article. This will be my first and most important Father’s Day greeting I have written in my 30 years of existence to our one and only beloved and Greatest Father of all, GOD.

They are all not a coincidence. God has a plan for everything and for each and every one of us. That, I am sure of. So here goes my simple letter.

Dear Father God,

You have seen my struggles and yet you have opened my eyes to see the struggles of others too. It is hard to love others through their imperfections while dealing with my own and yet You teach me how to love like how You loved us every single day. I can only express my utmost gratitude in this short letter of mine because despite of the pain, the tears and the heartbreaks, You made me see the beauty behind it all.

You have made me see the truth, the “whys” and the “hows” of the existence of this and that from the tangible to the not so tangible. Most importantly, You have showed me that living life without You is empty, pointless and meaningless. Through it all, it is only the Cross that You have taught me to see, to look up to and then have a different perspective of this world and the things around me. 

As much as I pray for the salvation of those around me, I actually pray for the salvation of everyone in this world. The world needs Your healing, Father. It needs more of Your love which never falters day in and day out for as long as there is a single form of life in this world. The Heavens and the Earth are all Yours. You have showered us with this magnificence to reveal to us that indeed, no other person could ever bridge those two together except through Your Son Jesus Christ whom You have risen from the dead who then became our way towards eternity. 

You can see each and every heart in this Earth, Father, and I pray that You would continue to open them hearts and shine Your light upon them. There is nothing I could pray far too deeply right now than to let it be known to Your people how much they are loved by You for we are your precious children. I will continue to sing praises and worship You, my Father, as Your daughter. And I will love you as my Father who is always there for me and always will be until the end of time.

All these I pray in the Mighty Name of Jesus,

Amen.

2 Corinthians 3:3

 “Clearly, you are a letter from Christ showing the result of our ministry among you. This “letter” is written not with pen and ink, but with the Spirit of the living God. It is carved not on tablets of stone, but on human hearts.”

10 Songs To Strengthen Your Marriage

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I stumbled across this article in my Facebook news feed and I thought it best to share it here as it is a compilation of some of the uplifting videos I have watched regarding Christian marriages. May it also uplift you one way or the other, married or not. 🙂

Here is the link to the article: http://www.hearitfirst.com/news/10-songs-to-strengthen-your-marriage

The Couple Sketch

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Couple Sketch

Couple Sketch

This is my first time to sketch a couple and I must admit I am apprehensive when my friend, Jalyn, asked me if I could do a portrait sketch of her friends as a wedding gift. But I was up for the challenge so the answer was “yes.”

This is the 5th sketch that I am to give away. For every art work I make, I feel like a part of me is instilled in it. Something like “The Picture of Dorian Gray.” 😉

The sketch is size 12″ x 18″ and I used just the regular 2B pencil.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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This is what TRUE LOVE means. Love does conquer all. May we not forget that as we celebrate Valentine’s Day. 🙂