This post is related to my previous post about my Facebook status update on concubinage and adultery. I posted it last March 19 and a month after it is still being shared on the newsfeed.

If I will be given the luxury of time to conduct academic research on the topic, I would gladly do so. But unfortunately, time is gold for me right now. In fact, I will be discussing my observations briefly in this article.

When I posted the status update, I must say it was more of a Spirit’s leading rather than a testimonial because my husband and I never went through the same predicament as the people who shared their experiences in the status comments. And looking at the comments, the statistics came up with 22 females and 1 male who have been victims of concubinage and adultery.

One question came up: Why women?

I cannot make an assumption or generalization that infidelity is an issue committed only by most men based on the results of that one single Facebook post. There are a lot of factors that come into play such as the idea that maybe women are more vocal about it than men. Or maybe men can move on easily than women.

Another question: Should you meddle with other people’s affairs?

There is a huge difference between meddling and providing information for someone’s benefit. I believe I have been successful with the latter and yet there is one thing that I believe is actually the exact reason why I was prompted to post it.

There are so many hearts that are bleeding because of love in what supposed to be holy matrimony – God sees it. The 22 women who have commented and those who have sent me private messages are in need of healing.

And no, I believe this is not the kind of healing where you get to hear their stories, suggest the legal actions they can undertake, and then expect them to get on with their lives. I am feeling there is something deeper than that – the kind of healing that only One person can provide.

Third question: Who will be the instrument towards that healing?

I am 33 years old with only 4 years of experience when it comes to being married. I am neither a professional counselor who went through proper training. And yet I am seeing a harvest, a huge number of it and I think the church can provide the support that these women need i.e. spiritual mentors backed by decades of experience in a marriage – a Godly one.

More specifically, mentors who are married women. A spiritual group, perhaps, where women who went through and are going through the aftermaths of infidelity will feel safe, assured, and last but not the least, loved. A group where they won’t feel left out because they’re no longer with their husbands and yet help them find themselves again through the loving grace of God.

As A Seed of Hope, An Instrument of Change

We are all being used by God every single day in school, at work, at home, and in our community as an instrument to lead people towards Christ and salvation. Just like the metaphor used in the Bible about a Christian and faith. Before a seed becomes a plant, it will go through several phases in several mediums before it will start to blossom or bear fruit. And yet God is the one who will keep it alive.

I felt like I haven’t done much of my part when I shared what are the legal actions to take in cases of concubinage or adultery. I feel that it has to be something deeper and something more than that. It is now my prayer to God to instruct me on how to lead these people towards salvation and eventually experience spiritual and inner healing without being obtrusive about faith. An opportunity where they will be the ones to seek Jesus as their Savior.

But for now, I believe we all need to be ready when the seed is due for planting. Any growing seed will need the TLC of a Gardener who will water and nourish it until it has grown its roots and been firmly planted on the ground. So no matter how harsh the elements around it are, it will and it will survive. 🙂

Jesus called out to them, “Come, follow me, and I will show you how to fish for people!” – Matthew 4:19

“…Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey all that I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” – Matthew 28:19-20

Always a mentee with God as the coach,

P.S.

This post reminded me of a photo I took several weeks back. I needed to place all my herb plants inside our room (a la greenhouse vegetable farming) because the winds are just too strong in our balcony. My plants were having a hard time growing new leaves so here I am, the gardener, “nursing them back to good health.” 😉